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Crazy like a bedbug!
Contesty Things!
This spot is totally for all of the "post a link on your page/blog/thing to enter the contest!" sorts of things.

My 3DS friend code is 1676-3752-0625, and here is my Mii QR :

My Mii QR Code
Nice Fish!
Sunday. 8.3.08 9:48 am
I was awakened this morning by someone sending me a message.

Oh, maybe it's Jeff, he wants to take a shower.
Oh, maybe it's Dave, he wants to send smooches.
Maybe it's Donnell, his mom is being insane.
Maybe it's one of my friends who like to send me odd chain texts.
Maybe it's Tammi who took a picture of something. Who knows.

I finally get up, to check my text, and it's a picture. Oh, maybe it's from Dave or Taylor or Tammi.

So between getting up, doing my morning routine, and checking this picture, I wonder who it is from, and what it could be, since the text at the least doesn't tell you who it is from.

Okay, so I am logging into the page, since my phone doesn't do pictures (I like it that way), nor does it do internets (doubly better).

What do I find?

A fish. From someone I don't know.

Might I add, it is a very tasty looking fish.

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Friday. 8.1.08 8:07 pm
I founded it!


Here is my friendly buddy code, if anyone wants to leave theirs in teh comments.

0988 9333 9502

Maybe one day I will show up to battle teh pokeymans.

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Whoo PB!
Thursday. 7.31.08 12:19 pm
I've won some peanut butter from Melting Mama, who writes about her weight loss surgery and life afterwards.

This peanut butter sounds pretty tasty, as I've taken a liking to things with flax seeds (even though they get stuck in my teeth and are really hard to bite). I'm pretty excited, even though I have about 3tbsp of regular PB, a whole unopened jar of natural PB, and then I'm getting this fancy flax PB.

I'm thinking that I should start reviewing all of the random things I win. Like that salad dressing from a while ago. I still haven't tried the berry one, so I don't know if it's any good or not...

Guess I'll have to have a salad party and a PB party.

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CRAZY NEWS! Eminem's making a children's CD!
Thursday. 7.17.08 6:07 pm
So I am reading my local newspaper's website.
I click on one of the sections, only to find the following news with the writers in parentheses:

Eminem To Produce Childrens Album (Duff Severe)

Britney Spears Finally Gives Up On Music Career (Mary Ellen Krabofski)

Film Festival Movies Not Really Very Good, Admits Organizer (Florette Smugnose)

Stock Alert: Yoda To Take Over The Empire In $313 Billion Takeover (Obi-Wan Kenobi)

Micro$oft Fails To Buy The World (Linus Torvalds)

The Sky Is Falling The End Is Near (Throckmorton P. Waterbody III)

The articles say, repeatedly:

"This copy is used for placement only. It is not meant to be read. Designers use this to show clients how copy would look if it was inserted here without the client getting caught up with what it really says. Without the client getting caught up with what it really says. Again, this not meant to be read."

They've been up for about a month and a half.

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Free coffee!
Wednesday. 7.16.08 6:03 pm
No, I'm not giving you a link to free coffee.

The local 7-11 seems to have problems selling hot drinks, so every now and again they will have some crazy promotion to get people to buy coffee. Every so often, the person working will just let me have a free coffee, because they're cool like that. I think the coffee doesn't sell because the mean old lady who works there makes it very weak. Also, she's mean, so I don't like to go in when she's working.

Anyway. Back in January there was a "free coffee" sign. Of course, I suspected monetary involvement, and didn't ask what was going on until three days before the promotion ended. Coffee wasn't selling between 4p and 11p, so they figured that giving away hot beverages in any size of their paper cups between those hours would get people used to buying it. I made sure to get as much coffee as I could. If only I'd asked a week earlier. Bah.

In the months between, I realized that I shouldn't go to 7-11 every day to buy a coffee for $1.29, as it adds up. I wanted to buy a travel mug, but the one I wanted was 7 dollars. Even with one free coffee and $.69 refills, I couldn't justify the initial cost. Oh, but it's 7 dollars. Oh but I have to wash it. Oh but.

A few days ago, we went to 7-11 to check out the milk prices after my Wal-mart milk expired. (The organic milk is everything I wanted and more... maybe I'll go have some with this coffee. Stupid pricey tasty organic milk.) On the door was a "buy a coffee mug and get a week's worth of coffee free" sign. Of course, I had to look into this, having wanted a mug and never turning down free coffee. I found the mug that I'd originally wanted, and now I have 6 free coffees, as I've used the initial and first free coffees. I figure that I wasn't going to buy the mug without any major incentive and would have kept paying $1.29 for a cup of coffee, so 8 free cups of coffee almost means that the mug is free and they are paying me to drink their coffee, since I won't have to buy coffee for at least 3 days.... In actuality, it's more like I've paid 3 dollars or so for the mug, with refills being $.69 each. I like it better in the "I wasn't going to buy the mug, so under that assumption..." sense. Mmm, coffee.

I also made more mini-oreo-pies, this time I actually put whipped cream and extra oreos in them. They're tasty.

I leave you with this tooly guy (my apologies), introducing a song that I have been singing for the past forever. Darn you, Shonen Knife! Also, the video... is interesting.

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I haven't eaten in a year! Or something.
Thursday. 7.10.08 1:26 pm
Almost like pyrogrl12's entry on esteem and body image and how it's no ones business but your own, but not quite?

But first, some background.

Quite some time ago, I was numerically obese. By a whole .2 on the BMI scale! Whoaaaaaa! Moo! Oink! (other disparaging anti-fat remarks here, including that backing-up warning beep).

Quite some time longer ago than that, my mom decided that she had ... issues. I've griped about them before.

Some time inbetween the two events, my mom decides to take her issues out on me. I've already realized that it seems mental illness runs in my mom's side of the family, and I'd like to stay as far away from those issues as possible.

Nope. Zomgah don't eat that, you will get fat. Zomgah blahblahblah. Wonderful growing up with mother who thinks you are garmonguous, even though you are quite... underweight. On top of this, of course everyone decides to point out that "whoa what is going on?" and poking and grabbing things and such. WTF, that's mine! Hands off! I totally should have bitten people.

Of course, between "zomgah don't eat that" and such, I ate many times more of it than I should have, and puberty and college were oh so generous with their gifts of womanly curves, yes, that's it, "womanly curves". The kind that apparently make you look pregnant (even though you have never even had a boyfriend, or been kissed, or anything like that), which is totally someone else's business for them to go ask my parents about. "No, she's just fat". Thanks.

Now the kvetching.

Between quite some time ago and now, I have fallen victim to my mother, her crazy, the media, its crazy, and who the hell else knows what. I am no longer... large Marge in charge, at the risk of a bit of sanity that I'd like to think I'm pretty good at holding on to. Some days it gets away, that sanity, and I find myself wearing a bit of my mother's crazy.

Anyway, no longer "obese", but merely overweight, and then "normal", I figure it's great, maybe people will STFU and go away. They won't poke at me and my bits anymore, grabbing handfuls and going "zomgah what's this" or such. Perhaps I can wear my shirts, or some pants, without hearing all of the bullshit that people like to give you.

Oh, was I right. Oh so right. It seems like even more people want to pay attention to things now. It's wonderfully awkward.

"You're looking great!" Um, ok? I wasn't before? Thanks...

"You've lost weight, haven't you?" Actually, yes. Yes I have. I can't seem to find it, do you know where it's gotten off to? It answers to "glorb." How the fuck do you answer this question without coming off as snooty and full of yourself? What kind of question is this to someone you haven't seen in a while? Couldn't "you look well/healthy" suffice? Is it even that important to point out?

"What did you do so I can do it?" Um... I fought a bit of crazy off with a stick, and now I've got a small shield holding it at bay? Do you want some crazy? I'll gladly give it to you. Here, have some extra crazy on top of that. I've got more than enough to go around. Of course then, since you have achieved the USA-ian holy grail, also known as weight loss, EVERYONE wants to pay attention to what/how you eat, and then comment on it. It's my plate, EYES OFF! You like this thing that I don't want? Have it. Please don't say "zomg no wonder, you aren't eating _____!" Of course I'm not eating it, I don't want it! If I do want it, I'll eat it, yes, I know, it's horrible for me and will go straight to my large, fleshy parts.

"You're tiny!" No. I'm not. Even without the crazy, I'm not "tiny", maybe smaller than the average, but not "tiny". Especially to someone who is taller, probably has kids, and isn't all that large themselves. Tiny is Jaslene Gonzales or Nicole Richie. Maybe even the Olsen twins. Tiny are the people that I would worry if they got caught in a strong crosswind. You'd never see them again! I'd like to think that I am healthily built, though I will agree that my frame is small. I'll also give them that compared to the city/county/state/country/world/solar system/galaxy/universe, I am tiny.

And my absolute favorite: "what, did you not eat for a year or something?" Consider the aforementioned crazy, and it's associated upbringing. As often as I dislike my mother, I find this sort of comment slightly offensive. What am I supposed to say? "I appreciate your attempt at flattery, but my mother is ill, and I'm trying to work doubly hard so I don't fall into it too." That just kills any sort of positivity in that statement, and is slightly rude. Yes, I am smaller than I was a year ago. It happens.

What do you reply to these people? I mean, sure, I can't deny that at some point in my life I was larger, but whose business is it other than my own? I do something so hopefully people won't keep commenting, and they just comment even more. Woo. At least my mom has stopped bitching at me.

Maybe I'll start telling people that I used tapeworms or cut off my third arm or have some sort of serious illegal drug habit. Maybe I engage in a bit of Pica. I sold both of my kidneys and my bladder to science. I had a few ribs removed. Who knows. Ooh! I'll tell them my TB went active, and now I've got consumption.

Can I have my body and not have people comment on it?

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