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Saturday. 5.10.08 11:16 pm
I missed the 11:11 strike by 5 minutes.
And I had a wish, too.


-is sad-

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Thursday. 5.8.08 9:50 pm
I get lost in my own world every time I listen to this video.
At least the first 5 minutes of it.

P.S. He is really playing; pay no attention to the lag YouTube applied to the video.

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I've come to realize.
Wednesday. 5.7.08 8:59 am
That I don't really like my dad's side of the family all that much.
My uncle is a dick-head all the time already, so that's a negative already. My dad's girlfriend is nice most of the time, but blamed me for something that was an accident then kept trying to squeeze apology after apology out of me after I had already apologized like, 15 times and MEANT IT. My grandma has been sour towards me lately, which I don't like. My dad is usually the one I can't put up with because of drinking habits and such, but right now he is my favorite.

An incident happened the other day at my dad's golf tournament where I needed to use my dad's girlfriends purse for a minute. Well, I forgot to give it back, and my dad and I were already half way across the golf course when I realized I still had it. I didn't know it had her cigarettes and money in it, it was a complete accident. (I'm going to call my dad's girlfriend JM to make typing easier) Well, JM and my uncle waited around apparently for an hour and a half waiting for us to return. What they didn't know is that the last half hour we were looking for them, too. We finally found them, JM came up to me, snatched the purse violently from my hands (yes, violently, and I am not over exaggerating) and said "You know that was really inconsiderate of you." Then she just walked away with my uncle. While they were walking away my uncle flipped me and my dad off, which REALLY pissed me off.

I know I wasn't thinking when I forgot to return the purse. But seriously, why wouldn't my uncle have money on him in the first place? SERIOUSLY. A 49-year-old man going to a golf tournament with no money? BULLSHIT. But what made me mad the most was that it was completely my fault, and JM and my uncle knew that too, but they had the fucking nerve to blame my dad. I'm sure he's done stupid things that were meant to be blamed for, but he didn't do anything. It was my fault, I took the purse, I forgot to return it, I am sorry.

And THEN, while they're getting all mad, they're making a scene in front of some of my dad's coworkers. It's none of their business, so they don't need to witness it. My uncle was only waiting with JM, so he needs to keep his nose on his fucking face and out of other people's business. The whole situation was between me and JM, but they decided to involve my dad, his coworkers and my uncle.

Bah, I'm done ranting. I just got mad because my dad does some stupid stuff sometimes, but when he is not in the wrong, LEAVE HIM ALONE.

Damn. O.O

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Monday. 5.5.08 8:59 pm
I feel so amazing!

I've been so happy the past two days! I've been all over the place! So happy! So hyper! So free!

I hope this isn't fake happiness. Because I love it too much. I want it to stay stay stay, don't go away!

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So many mistakes that are made.
Friday. 5.2.08 8:51 am
On my part.

-sigh- Why is it so easy for us to see the mistakes in other people, but when we do them ourselves, they're no longer mistakes, simply the actions we take. There is nothing wrong with what we do, because it is what we are doing. We are blinded by our own feelings, unaware of the consequences that may follow.

Ugh. I've been neglectful to one of my best friends, and it's stupid. I want to take it back, but you can't change what's already happened.

Gah, why do I keep doing this! Stevie, you know who I'm talking about. You know what happened at the fireworks. I don't MEAN to to it, but I end up doing it anyway. And now it's happened again, and I feel twice as horrible.

I am going to make damn sure that I make it up to her come her birthday. And I don't make the same mistake again. EVER.

(And, no, this isn't a pitty party for Steigen. This is simply me seeing my mistake, and sharing it with you. And maybe asking for help.)


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I can't help but somewhat believe this.
Wednesday. 4.30.08 8:28 pm
"Guys use the emotional to get the physical. Girls use the physical to get the emotional."

I'm reading this book called Dateable (I would underline the title, but NuTang isn't letting me D:) It gives away secrets and thoughts that teenage guys and girls have when dealing with the opposite sex. A lot of the stuff it states makes sense, and a lot of things I have seen happen before.

This one quote, though, scares me. Hopefully this only applies to teen guys, and not older men as well. I would hope to God that not ALL teen guys are like that, but unfortunately, seeing as I am not a guy, I wouldn't know.

It was sad to read that a guys' ultimate goal was sex and that a girl's ultimate goal was love. Most girls think that sex is a symbol of their love. Most guys ultimately don't see it this way.

Please don't think I'm totally close-minded. I'm just giving my response to the quote.

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