I'm a Megalomaniac, dude.
Location Somewhere, VA
» More info.
Buncha Fuckin Jibberish
"Hate Humanity? Yep, sure do. There's such a lack of responsibilty for one's actions in the world, a selfishness, and a great destruction in the way people live their lives. It's all instant gratification,and who cares how my instant gratification affects those around me, or on a small personal level or a global level. The way people treat eachother is truly disgusting, and we've created an environment through advances in science and technology that allows for a very septic society to thrive. And we breed and breed, and all the wrong people breed while all the right people don't wanna have children because they don't wanna place them in this world"
Lyrics of the day
Totalimmortal by AFI
Hope unknown. Sometimes just waking is surreal.
I walk right through the nameless ones.
I know that hope's unknown.
Sometimes the water feels so real.
As I walk through it fills my lungs, my god, I'm drowning.
This day never seems to end.
This pain, never.
This rage I will not let go.
I hear them calling.
I feel them gnawing out holes through flawless souls.
So alone. Sometimes I swear that I can hear the taunting of the voiceless ones.
I fear that I alone fear those who ceased to feel that they're alone inside this place.
I am the misplaced.
Now ever face, it looks familiar...
then every face would melt away until..
now everyone, do you know, I know your deception?
S M T W T F S 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28
My Current Playlist
- All That's Left
- Paper Tigers
- The Melting Point of Wax
- Under a Killing Moon
- Blood Clots and Black holes
- So Strange I Remeber You
- At A Glance
- Narrative of Soul Against Soul
- Fall Children
- Soap Box Derby
- Days of the Phoenix
- Total Immortal
- The Despair Factor
- Rotting Vampire Eyeballs
Damnit, all these good concerts comin'!
Tuesday. 9.23.03 2:32 pm
311 is gonna be at the vcu siegle center along with alien ant farm. OMG i wanna see that shit so bad but i don't think i'll have the money for it.... i mean i got the money, but i just don't wanna spend it. lol! i've been doin good with savin, i don't needa start gettin in the habit of spending again. Thrice and Thursday are gonna be havin a show too. :( AND the white stripes are on tour. too much stuff man. lol. oh yeah and brit finally got her power back. i know she's happy. within two minutes of it comin on her ass jumped right online. lol!!! and i did the same thing when mines came on. now we just gotta wait on laura.
Me and laura gotta call up ECPI too about our financial aid stuff but i talked to this guy who goes there on the comp. last night and he said that they're still out of power and they moved to another campus to conduct business and classes, i was like 'geez!' we start in just two weeks so i dunno what's gonna happen. we may have to start at the other campus, but i dunno where its at.
My damn income is SUCKING right now because i haven't worked in a damn WEEK. lol. in a way yes its very nice to get this lil vacation but at the same time... my ass needs money. lol. tommy is probably down in virginia beach tryin to see what he can do about his beach house, because i'm sure the hurricane took that thing out. and Laura wants us to go to Nags Head next month, i hope its kinda back to normal by then because from what i saw on the news, it was like that place just got wiped out. but i'm gonna be like my mama and bring a camera so i can take pictures of this stuff. lol.
Tuesday. 9.23.03 10:57 am
You want me to stay out, yet you come back and comment on MY page? only reason i saw your damn page was because SOMEONE brought it to my attention, i wasn't even gonna look at your damn page. and i didn't do anything as immature and commented IN yours either, i'm just writing my own feelings in my own blog. and oh i got some logical shit to say, but i didn't feel like getting all into it, cuz then youd get even more pissed and this keeps goin, but here we go. She's tryin to make ME out like this lying, two-timing, cheating, self-righteous slut who doesn't care about anybody or anything. hmmm. i find that so funny because all they did was actually show their true colors and described themselves... seriously. not to be a smartass. and that i try to act like whoever i think is the slightest bit unique? and i try to act like i have so much in common with everyone? wow, that sounded really... intelligent. especially since for the longest time SHE was the only person my ass ever hung around, so u mean to tell me she's sayin (in so many words) that i acted like her and I'M the self-righteous one? please, that's funny. but its about time she saw what a unique and creative person she was. but see if that was brought up to her she'd be like "i never said that. you obviously must think you acted like me because i never said that" and blah blah bullshit. mmhm. yeah... i'm just tryin to live my life with no drama man. that's all i want. cuz i had enough crap go on in the last two years or so to last a lifetime. i'm just tryin to move on from this and get around a more positive atmosphere. and i'm doin that by surrounding myself with ppl who actually CARE about me and isn't putting on an act and holding in years and years of resentment that was never... ever shown. and its funny how certain ppl can think they're mature now just because they don't act as fuckin stupid as they used to and acts "selective" about the things they tell ppl now.... wow, thats a big step up! its sad it had to get to this point. it literally makes me sick to my damn stomach that it's gotten to this point and its so petty to me. but u know me, i always gotta run my mouth sooner or later on an issue, huh? and i supposedly "use" people too. hm, that's amazing how she says that when she doesn't even know the whole situation of what happened, and that things are put in the past and its time to move forward in life. i never use/used anyone. i just happen to have true friends that don't mind bein there for me. but its funny how this person played so many tricks on ppl and backstabbed people she thought was so two faced (Jessica) yet she acts just as buddy buddy as she wants to act to their face, but i guess Tammi's actions are always placed under special circumstances, huh? like she could NEVER do anything wrong, cuz she's the funny girl... oh everything is just one, big ass joke. Cuz i bet tammi would never tell jessica to her face all the times she's talked about how ugly she was, talked about her dirty teeth that she never brushes, talked about how she was on medication cuz she caught some kind of disease, talked about her boobs, talked about how stupid and how high and mighty she acts, how spoiled she is and she needs to stop bitchin about the shit she doesn't get cuz her mama always buys her anything she wants, and talks about how she needs to suck a cock. Sounds so immature right?... hell yeah i partook of this but i didn't act like i was this good friend to her ass at the same time either. Tammi and this guy who also knew jessica, jokin on her all damn night. jokin on her and cory, talkin bout how cory is probably buttugly, and so much other shit i can't even remember, because this happened on a nightly basis, yep that's her buddy! But heeey, i guess that's how life goes right? I guess their common bond right now is hating me and thinking i'm a bitch. I do see my faults i never said i was perfect or always right, i know i'm far from perfect and i sometimes think i know everything... i know that. i got my father to thank for that one. i have admitted that me keepin me and quincy from her for so long might of have been wrong, but ever fuckin thing i ever done was in her best interest in mind, but i knew me going out with her "ex boyfriend" wasn't something she was gonna appreciate, so the only thing i knew to do was hide it cuz SHE didn't seem to understand where i was coming from. and plus when i tried to shed some truth on us, she goes off sayin she can't talk to me nor him anymore and slits her wrists at the same time... ? what the hell. and her not wanting to explain her feelings to me because i wouldn't understand, i don't buy that crap cuz u don't know how the hell i'm gonna take stuff if u never ask. and about that whole stupid lil bryan thing. was i aware that she felt like this? ooooofffffff course not! why? because she never tells me SHIT. so i'm left to look like the bad girl who continuously hurts her feelings but is never aware of it. he gave ME his number then he asked for mine, and only reason i gave it and took his is so u could see how fuckin triflin he was, and i thought that sank through your thickass head. and i even told you about the whole damn convo we had, about how yes he did ask me out and i was like 'you're talkin to my best friend, tammi ain't ya?' and he was all like 'well yeah' and i was like 'well then that wouldn't be right now would it?" and he was like 'naw' and i could tell he had that stupid ass grin on his face, cuz he knew wtf he was doin. and i talked to him to get info outta him for YOUR ass, and we even laughed and joked about the things i told you he said on the phone, but i guess u forgot about that too. i could give two shits about what bryan thinks about he cuz he don't fuckin know me. cuz he ain't a fuckin saint himself. he knew i didn't like his fuckin ass. and these lil games u claim u catchin on to? i don't even know what the hell you're talkin about, so keep on thinkin that in your lil paranoid mind. and i don't need your ass for anything, i HAVE been stayin out your life, but one lil thing got flipped into an arguement, so fuck it. i'm the slut? hm, did i have a threesome which i kept from my best friend for lord knows how long and got fucked in the ass? oops! no i think that's someone else. i actually DID cheat on my boyfriend with a fuckin ugly, asshole of a guy, yet played it off like i got raped? oops! no i think that was someone else. seems like ppl can say whatever the fuck they want about ppl, yet the second lil quiet stephanie decides to say something, she's always in the wrong and needs to stay out. please. uh huh... now you go find someone else to fuckin prey on.
This is funny
Tuesday. 9.23.03 2:24 am
Awww looks like i pissed someone off... wow, my feelings are like... so... hurt. lol! i'm achin here, i really am. ::rolls eyes:: funny how when someone tries to talk about you, they describe themselves to a fuckin TEE. but its all good. i'm tryin to live life with no drama man. its sad its gotten to this point, but hey, that's life. and i like how they tried to put my business out there, but i'm not even gonna go on that level cuz there ain't no point, petty junk. the end.
I'm seein Good Charlotte, baby!
Tuesday. 9.23.03 12:15 am
lol. I just got the tix today. me and the girls are goin to see em in Norfolk. i'm freakin excited man... just gotta figure out what to wear... ::strokes chin:: hmmmm.
I'm chillin dawg
Monday. 9.22.03 7:10 pm
Yeah i just got home, and now i'm bored. :( lol!... i was at brit's house last night. and her and laura still don't have electricity yet, and yes i know i know, u wonderin "why the hell u stay at someone's house who DOESN'T have power when ya just got your power back the night before?"... welllllll ya see its because i'm a DUMBASS! yeah... that about sums it up. lol! naw but it was to get my mind off things and cuz they're just fun to hang out with. laura spent the night too... of course. and as usual we were actin crazy then after our energy got drained, i was laura and brits pillow and we were all just sittin there talkin. then the rugrats came in and they were bouncin off the walls like they always do. i love playin with haven, he just turned 4 like a couples weeks ago and he is just a trip. callin ppl stupidheads and fartheads and beatin up on ya. he's a spunky lil thing. but then me laura and brit went ridin around and laura let me drive like half the day and brit was support-en me. lol. cuz laura used to always scream out us when we drive but laura only screamed once so i musta did a good job. lol!!! but later on we caught up with brit's guy Preston... my gawd they are so damn cute together. we went to food lion to go visit him at his job. and he's so funny. i love his sense of humor. preston and brit's personalities just work so well together. so we hung outside of food lion like it was "da chill spot" or somethin for like an hour i guess. and preston was talkin bout how he was gonna bump Choppa Style in his car. LoL! that was so funny, he's like a ghetto white boy. then afterwards we finally decided to meet up at brit's house since preston was finally off the clock and didn't have anything to do, so laura and preston raced eachother to brits house. then we hung out for a while outside of her house because she didn't bring her freakin key so we had to wait for her mommy. then today preston came over again and just chilled while me and laura ran some errans (sp?) then came back with 25 dollars worth of taco bell food. lol! laura treated everyone... she's a sweetheart. haven was eatin the stuff like he was a dog and preston was ticklin brit cuz she sounds like a baby when she laughs, it was just madness in that room. but we finally got it together and just chilled the rest of the day. and now i'm here. and me and laura were goin through OLD pics at my house of me and her when we were like four years old. laura had the prettiest eyes ever in those pics. and in each pic we were either holding hands or hugging. it was so cute. lol! and both of us had these big ass grins. laura HAD to take em home so she could scan em whenever she gets power back. lol! oh yeah and laura got this guys digits the yesterdaaaaay. :) and she called the kid and had the biggest smile on her face when she called cuz she usually doesn't call guys and get their numbers and what not. i was so happy for her. and i was happy for brit cuz she seems to have so much fun with preston. he's a cool guy. on a whole, it was just a nice time.
Isabel was a BITCH!
Sunday. 9.21.03 5:59 am
Thank God we made it through that. The wind and rain was a lot worse than i thought it was gonna be. it sounded like the oceans was making waves right beside your window. I know virginia beach is just straight tore up.and Nags head. everyone was callin the house makin sure we were alright, and termaine, jessica, brit and laura called complainin about how they were bored. lol!!! laura said me her and brit were goin through computer withdrawl. lol! it did suck majorly not havin a puter nor LIGHT, or any kind of electricity for like 3 days. it was startin to get under my skin once the second day started to kick in. but i'm really worried because i haven't heard from quincy at all since the day of the storm. his mother called me askin if i heard from him and i said no. so we were tryin to hunt him down for the past two days. his phones were out of service so i couldn't reach him that way, so i went by his dorm to see how he was doin and to surprise him if he WAS there but when i walked in, the room was empty. both quincy and ernest's beds were made and i saw quincy's computer was gone, so that gave me the idea that he packed up and went somewhere. usually he goes home when he's packed up like that. but i left him a lil note and placed it on his pillow in case he returned. then i tried callin his dorm later on that day and ernest picked up (finally) and he said that quincy had went home which baffled me cuz i called his mom like a while after i had got home from his dorm and she said she hadn't seen/heard from him at all. soooo that made me highly worried. lol. makes me think somethin seriously happened to him. but u know, u try to think happy thoughts... :-/
Since we finally have electricity, i probably have to work today. i'm gonna get dressed and all that good stuff and go by there and see if tommy finally opened up the place. i hope nobody broke in there cuz i heard there were a lot of breakins since there was no electricity. if tommy is open, work is gonna be a bitch i know, because there are gonna be people out the ying yang tryin to get their meds filled. if tommy does happen to have electricity, he's better off just waiting until monday where he has a full day to do everything and more than just one (me) girl working the whole day. and plus that way he could just take today to straighten out the place and fix the clocks and computers if they need it. well i'm going back to bed. later kids.
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