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xxJillybaberzxx
Age. 32
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. White
Location Gillett, PA
School. Other
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Welcome Back Seniors of 05!
Friday, June 3, 2005
Heck yes! The senior trip was pretty awesome. There was some problems that arent really solved but Im just going to let them go and not let it bother me, because I dont want to live my life thinking about how other people feel. Whatever right? :) But..Washington is beautiful. Those who didnt go on it, can go there, and be like yeah this is it, but experiencing it with your friends and having so much fun together, is something that youll never be able to do. My suggestion, if you have the chance... go! :) Im definatly glad I got too..even though it did rain while we were at the beach. But Tabby getting her tongue pierced, and Lev getting her cartiledge pierced definatly made it worth it. Plus Ashley, Jessica, Asti, Zach, and I all got henna tats. It was an amazing time! The cruise...was MAD awesome. I have never ever danced so much in my entire life. I love Tom and Im going to miss him soooo much. It's going to feel good going back on Monday and seeing some people that I didnt get to see on the trip because they didnt go. Hopefully Ill get to talk to them this weekend or something. The only thing that really sucked, was riding on the bus, but I layed on the floor with Tom for awhile so it made it all better because I could stretch my legs out. I got a henna tat on my ankle because you could see it with my skirt on at the cruise, and plus it looks hot on my ankle. Lol, it makes me really want to get one there. I told my dad and mom about Tabs tongue and they both just laughed and said dont come home with anything. I couldnt anyways! I told my mom it was only 28 to get my belly button done and she is like, well I would have done it, and Im just like..ugh Im not 18, and she is like maybe I could have talked to them! Wouldnt have that been awesome if I could have done it? Well, I guess I can wait and go get it done at bring your skin for a higher price. Let's talk about Tabby's experience shall we? Well... we were standing out in the lobby because she was gagging on the piece of paper towel he had to dry off her tongue, so we all left so she wouldnt like..start laughing or something, and like we are standing out there and we hear..HOLY SHIT! and we look at the guy beyond the desk and we're like, does that happen a lot? and he is like..not usually. And she comes out sticking her tongue out with a big smile on her face. And we're like, did it hurt, and she is like YEAH! lol...Then she told us she said holy shit after it was over with because she couldnt believe she did it. I was really jealous. I totally would have done that with her or something. Haha! Anyways..it was an awesome time, but Im going to go to bed now because Im flippin tired. :) Have a good one..peace

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*cheers* It's all over! *clap clap clap*
Friday, May 27, 2005
ummmm..yeah Okay. It's a little softball cheer going on but thats okay. Actually, I got it from when our football team was actually good and like used to win every friggin game. But even the best fall down sometimes...right? Right! Anyhoo! Im really tired, and today was my offical last day of high for the rest of my life. It makes me sad. It's not like Im going to miss school, Im going to college, which is a new reality, but I definatly am thinking right now..where did my life go? I mean, it feels like just yesterday I was watching Saved By the Bell, and like..wishing I was them..being in high school, and now I just lived it all? Does that not freak anyone else out? I mean, not only is that part of our lives over with, but we cant have it back, and pretty soon, we'll be old, have grandkids, and thinking about our families, when to retire, and then we die. It makes me step back and go, omg... I only have like what..less then a 100 years to live? Life is too short. Yeah, Ill be the first one to admit that I have made some mistakes, but that doesnt mean that they those mistakes havent made me a stonger person because they have. I mean, I let go of a lot of people because they werent healthy for me in my life. No way at all! Im a better person...well not really. Im just still really a bitch, but I had a rough last year or two... so Im trying to get back on the wagon and make everything better for me. I didnt cry today...amazingly enough. Ill cry on graduation though. Definatly! I mean, there will just too many people that Ill wanna give a hug and be like, I love you forever and dont ever leave me! Lol! Like Tabby! I mean...I love that girl to pieces and we have been through more shit than anyone I fucking know! I love her so much, and I dont want to lose her, but she is going to Messiah, and like in a year..Im going to Ohio! That scares me right there. I mean... it's friggin scary. Im never ever gonna talk to some of these people again? Oh the game last night, made me realize all that. It was friggin crazy. We stood out in the center field..all of us..for 20 minutes, just crying, hugging each other, and saying how proud we were of each other, and it's all like a sisterly love. I love it.. We lost last night... 1 to 2. Which...kinda makes me sad. Well it does make me sad.. and they...I wont talk about it. It just makes me mad. Moving on! Monday..Im getting up at 3, to get ready to go to TROY, to go on the senior trip. I cant friggin wait! It is going to be so much fun hanging out with Tabby, Jessica, Asti, Levii and all my other gal pals. We are going to have so much fun getting tats and piercings and shit! Getting into trouble. Remmy Lev, you gotta help me from the oxygen bar. lol It's going to be a flipping blast. Im glad there is only 55 of us going. It kinda..sucks, but like, someone I dont want going that are, but its better than someone people that could be going right? right! Oh man, I cant wait.. Im going shopping with my mommy for the senior trip tomorrow. I think my grandma is going so it should be lots of fun! It ususally is with those two around. My mom and I got into a fight last night, which Im really trying to understand her, but..it just.. I dunno. It's weird. I love her to pieces, but I just want her to let me go...ya know? Im so glad she has been here through the years though, I dunno what I have done without her. I couldnt imagine her not being around, and for so many people, they have that problem, and I feel horrible for them, and it makes me feel selfish. If my mom wasnt here for prom, to see me graduate...or something, Id friggin cry like everyday. Well, I cant say that. My mom wouldnt want me to cry all the time because I know she's be around me when everything happened. I love ghost and spirits...UGH! I love it..Im gonna go.. Peace out!

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HEY LOOK WHAT I FOUND!......I got it off my Xanga.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
HAVE YOU EVER .. ?

[x] been drunk.
[x] smoked pot.
[x] kissed a member of the opposite sex.
[ ] kissed a member of the same sex.
[ ] been to japan.
[ ] rode in a taxi.
[x] been dumped.
[x] shoplifted.
[ ] been fired.
[ ] been in a fist fight.
[x] had sex.
[ ] had a threesome - kissing or otherwise
[ ] snuck out of your parent's house.
[ ] been arrested.
[x] made out with a stranger. well..he wasnt really a stranger...much
[ ] stole something from your job.
[ ] celebrated new years in times square.
[ ] went on a blind date.
[x] lied to a friend.
[x] had a crush on a teacher.
[ ] celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans.
[ ] been to europe.
[x] skipped school.
[ ] thrown up from drinking. mmhmm :) go me
[ ] lost your sibling.
[x] played 'clue'
[x] had a sleepover party.
[x] went ice skating.
[x] cheated on a bf/gf.
[x] been cheated on.
[x] had a sweet sixteen.
[ ] had a quinceaera.
[x] had a car.
[x] drove.
[x] cut myself on purpose
[ ] seen someone die
[ ] been to africa
[x] driven over 400 miles to attend a show/festival
[X] been to canada
[ ] been to mexico
[ ] been on a plane
[ ] seen the rocky horror picture show
[ ] Thrown up in a bar
[ ] purposely set a part of yourself on fire
[ ] eaten sushi
[ ] been snowboarding
[x] met someone in person from the internet. someone I knew! lol
[ ] been moshing at a concert
[x] had feelings for someone you knew only online
[ ] had plastic surgery
[ ] been in an abusive relationship
[ ] gone to college
[ ] graduated college
[ ] tried killing yourself
[x] thought about trying to kill yourself
[x] taken painkillers advil?


ARE YOU .. ?

[ ] ugly.
[x] pretty.
[x] ok.
[x] bored.
[x] happy.
[x] bilingual. in my own way...hehe
[x] white.
[ ] black.
[ ] mexican.
[ ] asian.
[ ] short.
[x] medium-height
[ ] tall.
[ ] grounded.
[ ] sick.
[ ] a virgin.
[x] lazy.
[x] single.
[ ] taken.
[ ] looking.
[ ] not looking.
[x] talking to someone.
[x] IMing someone.
[x] scared to die.
[x] tired.
[x] annoyed.
[ ] hungry.
[x] thirsty.
[ ] on the phone.
[ ] in your room.
[ ] drinking something.
[ ] eating something.
[x] in your pjs.
[x] ticklish.
[x] listening to music


DO YOU .. ?

[ ] have a bf.
[ ] have a gf.
[x] have a crush.
[x] feel loved.
[x] feel lonely.
[x] feel happy.
[ ] hate yourself.
[x] think youre attractive.
[x] have a dog.
[ ] have your own room.
[x] listen to rap.
[x] listen to rock.
[ ] listen to soul.
[ ] listen to techno.
[x] listen to reggae.
[x] paint your nails.
[x] have more than 1 best friend.
[x] play an instrument.
[x] have slippers.
[x] wear boxers.
[x] wear black eyeliner.
[x] like the color blue.
[x] like the color yellow.
[ ] cyber.
[x] like to read.
[x] like to write.
[x] have long hair.
[ ] have short hair.
[x] have a cell phone.
[x] have a laptop.
[ ] have a pager.
[x] miss someone right now.

DESCRIBE YOUR..
[ x ] Wallet-brown, black..and....looks awesome haha
[ x ] Hairbrush - blue
[ x ] Toothbrush - ..it's pink :D..I think it's like Colgate or something
[ x ] Jewelry worn daily- hemp necklace, hemp ankle braclet, class ring
[ x ] Pillow cover- ..Rubber duckies, flowers, and maroon and black
[ x ] Blanket- tan, leopard, white, california blanket, and red and blue softie
[ x ] Coffee cup- Black
[ x ] Sunglasses- they are weird..dont really wear em much
[ x ] Underwear- black..
[ x ] Favorite shirt- hmm.. lol, my what not to say to your b/f shirt
[ x ] Cologne/Perfume - wink!
[ x ] CD in stereo right now- American Idoit - Green Day
[ x ] Tattoos - none...unfortunatly..but Can I say what I want? I want a sun with a moon mixed together on my back..and a fairy tat on a mushroom on my butt..a small heart on my right hip, and a star with a buncha little stars on my right hip
[ x ] Piercings - just my ears so far..then Im getting my belly button, industrical, and tongue done
[ x ] What you are wearing now - softball sweatshirt, softball sweatpants, a white tshirt, a wife beater, a sports bra, and my cool panties that say..three strikes and you are out!
[ x ] In my head - wow, do you really wanna know?
[ x ] Wishing - ...this was over with..SCHOOL!
[ x ] After this - studyin a little and going to bed!
[ x ] Fetishes - biting
[ x ] If you could get away with it and murder anyone,who and for what reason? no one too special
[ x ] Person you wish you could see right now - hrmn! him! dammit UGH ID love to see him again
[ x ] Is next to you- *looks* a chair.. and on the floor..my basic science stuff
[ x ] Some of your favorite movies - super troopers... interview with the vampire, queen of the damned
[ x ] Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month - YEAH graduation and my birthday :):)
[ x ]The last thing you ate- ummm, cereal
[ x ] Something that you are deathly afraid of- dying alone
[ x ] Do you like candles? you bet
[ x ] Do you like incense? ...like the things you burn? haha yeah
[ x ] Do you like the taste of blood? it's ok
[ x ] Do you believe in love? yes
[ x ] Do you believe in soul mates? yes
[ x ] Do you believe in love at first sight? yupperz
[ x ] Do you believe in Heaven? mmhmm
[ x ] Do you believe in God - yes
[ x ] What do you want done with your body when you die- I want my organs donated to people who need em
[ x ] If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be - tiger!
[ x ] Can you eat with chopsticks? - ...a little bit
[ x ] What's your favorite coin- dime
[ x ] What are some of your favorite candies- toostie pop suckers! I love sucking on stuff...*add to fetish* haha
[ x ] What's something that you wish people would understand - I only get to name one thing? hmmmm... that you are beautiful the way you are!
[ x ] What's something you wish you could understand better - that I am beautiful
[ x ] Who is someone that you really wish was still around - my great grandma..

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
01 | losing people i love
02 | hights..sorta
03 | dying young
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 | tabby
02 | asti
03 | amanda..I wanna say more people!

THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | my friends
02 | my family
03 | my bed

------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 | stupid people..lol
02 | cocky people..b/c I cant take it..I can dish it ..but not take it..sometimes
03 | not gettng enough sleep
-----------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 | my bear claw clip
02 | the computer lol
03 | and a buncha papers
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | doing this
02 | talking to jeff..yeah
03 | wishing I was talkin to someone lol
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | ride a big ass roller coaster
02 | bungi jump
03 | own a vineyard with my own bar..after Im a successful pharmacist with my own shop of course
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | ..write poems
02 | sing
03 | dance! woo! and play softball
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | kind..which goes with nice and sweet :D
02 | bitchy..but sometimes people deserve a good smack in the face
03 | funny
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | do that thing with my tongue to make it look like a flower
02 | fly
03 | umm... climb very high? I dunno
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 | Music..EVERYDAY
02 | the sounds of the waves
03 | your friends when they need you
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 | umm..lol.. loud annoying bird noises when you are sleeping
02 | loud annoying people in the house that..make loud noises when your sleeping
03 | alarm clock when all you wanna do is sleep
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 | fuck
02 | Wtf
03 | awesome
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 | steak...country girl I am..haha
02 | pasta.. I loveeee pasta!
03 | salads.
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN:
01 | Japanesse
02 | French..more...
03 | Spanish
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY:
01 | water
02 | milk
03 | orange juice..Im putting gatorade with this one haha
------------------------------------------------------------
THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
01 | gummi bears!
02 | care bears
03 | under the umberlla tree





anyways, the game was cancelled..sooooooooooooooooooo I have the game tomorrow..the first final I took was easy..and well, the second one..we wont go there, but I have another final tomorrow, then, Im going to go with Sarah, Em, and Rach to Sarah's house I think....so..Im out for the night. Time to study a little bit more and sleep. Peace!

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Fudge
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
WELL! I have a district game against Wyalusing tomorrow...
I have two finals tomorrow..
Im friggin tired... so Im gonna go study and go to sleep...
Gots to get up early for breakfast w/ my sball girls... peace

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Evening
Sunday, May 22, 2005
And while others have their heads rested against their pillows...sleeping such beautiful dreams, Im awake and thinking about going to bed. And while others, cry as the pools of teardrops take notice on their pillows, Im sitting here, just crying as the tears pool on my pillow thats sitting on my lap.. what is the world coming too.. And why do I feel so depressed at times, when others Im so happy. Well...that is a thinker huh? It must be the rain.... So gloomy.... I love it though. Well...Im heading off to bed I guess. Another weekend down in my life that I wont be able to change... I wish better things would have happened and Im kicking myself for not just doing it. *sigh* Oh well..sometime...someday.. Ill find a way..





In the words of Travis..."I wanna do it..hardcore doggy style..." just playin...

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Boring
Saturday. 5.21.05 3:43 pm
So anyways...I had practice this morning at like 8 because it's prom today and well the girls had their time to get their hair done and stuff. It is getting to look like rain outside, so I really hope it doesnt rain on them. Well, some people I wouldnt minded if it rained on them. Woo that is an evil face. lol! So anyways, my friend and I had it planned that I would go over to his house to hang out, but that didnt work out because my mom was like no, you arent hanging out with him and all this great shit. Thank you for taking over my life and not letting me make decisions for myself. I really appreciate it! Seriously, she pisses me off sometimes. I really wish that she would let me live my life, and not... take it over. She is going to be sooo suprised when I go to college. I need to break out..Im serious. She is gone this whole week, and Im so glad. I love her to pieces but I wish she'd just.. let me go. Seriously.. I mean, I love her, and everything, but its annoying as hell, and she doesnt even realize it. You can only hold on to a person so hard for so long... before they just wanna freak out and say fuck you, leave me alone! Ugh anyways... I wanna do something tonight so maybe Ill figure out something to do. Im doing laundry right now. Heck yeah! I was going to sit out and tan, but that doesnt seem to be a good idea now since the sun isnt on. Oh well! Maybe someone will talk to me that I want too.. oh wait, they are talking to someone else and not me. Talk about being shafted. Gotta love it...right? Im glad Im the only person who knows what Im talking about. :) Cheers! Peace

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