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dreams
Saturday. 8.25.07 7:15 pm
I had two really odd dreams last night. The people in them were the same, but the events taking place were very different.

The first one took place at night in an apartment that I had. I was with a few friends, some of whom I know in real life, others I knew in the dream, but not in real life. The three people that I knew, I know would never be together in the same place. So that in itself was weird.

I had just turned 21 a few weeks prior and we were meeting at my apartment to head out to a bar. The guy who was my boyfriend, I didn't know. Steve, a friend from Tucson, Denise, my best friend in middle school, and Ashley, Denise's sister were the three people who I knew. One of us had an 8 seater SUV, a light blue color, but I don't know exactly what kind or whose it was. Not all of us would fit in the SUV so the 4 people who didn't fit went in another car.

It skipped ahead to a few hours later. Our group had shrunk by about 6 people, but my beau, and the three friends I know were still there with me. That's all I remember from that one.

The other dream, it started out during the day. I was looking at myself in a mirror. I was wearing a beautiful white dress. My hair was done up and there were a few other girls flitting around the room, also wearing beautiful dresses. Their dresses, however, were a darker grey color. It was then that I realized I was only an hour away from getting married. I was going to get married!

It skipped ahead again, and I was at the alter. The guy I was marrying was the same guy who was my beau from the other dream. Steve was one of the groomsmen; Denise and Ashley were two of the bridesmaids {my sister was the maid of honor and will be in my real life wedding.} I was done saying my vows and was about to say my "I do." I took a look around at all the people who were attending, thinking about the things that got me to this point in my life and then I looked back at my almost husband ... that's when I woke up.

I sort of wish I knew what these dreams meant, but I know they have no significance. Oh well.

Anywho, I seem to be getting more and more boring. I'm not getting many comments. Again, not that I care ... I just like seeing proof that people actually read what I write.

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boycott...
Saturday. 8.25.07 12:15 am
As much as I want to boycott food right now, I seem to be unable to resist, especially the munchie food. Why am I boycotting food you might ask? Well, lemme tell you.

I have a wisdom tooth trying to push its way through my gums ... for the umpteenth time in the past few years. It hurts to chew anything solid. Even something as soft as a Hostess cupcake or macaroni. I've dealt with this pain before, but I don't remember it being this bad before. The last time I had to go on a "liquid" diet was just after I got my tongue pierced and I had a bad burn blister right by the new piercing. {that shit hurt worse than this}

But you may ask "why don't you just chew on the other side of your mouth?" I can't. The other side of my mouth is screwed up to the point where I can only have it fixed through surgery. The only thing I'm able to chew on the left side of my mouth is gum. Other than that, nothing.

The thing I'm not liking about the wisdom tooth trying to push its way through, besides the pain, is that most people I know got them much earlier in life. Then again, I know some people never have to deal with wisdom teeth. I wish I was one of those people. I deal with enough pain on a regular basis, with the constant headaches, the hip problems and my joints hurting until I crack them, that I don't need any additional, unnecessary pain.

Anywho, I've applied at a few more places in hopes that someone will call me. I really, really need a job. My money seems to be running shorter and shorter by the day, even though I'm not spending it.

The car still isn't fixed. Its putting a slight strain on me working towards getting my license. I'd really rather not drive the car in the condition its in, {check out my gallery if you want to see what the car looks like} but if I have to I will. I really hope it gets fixed in the next week. If not, I'll have to start driving it in its current condition.

Uhm, I think that's it for now. I can't think of anything else to say so I'll write again whenever.

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bah!
Friday. 8.24.07 4:41 am
I'm not very happy with the whole computer/router/internet thing right now. We started having problems again and I've just spent another 4 hours of wasted time on trying to fix the problem. I'm not sure if its completely fixed, but it seems to be working better.

I'd hate to jinx it by saying that, but I'm taking the risk.

I have two indicators stating that I'm connected to the internet. One is telling me that I'm connected with excellent connection. The other one is still saying that its 'acquiring a network connection.' I'm gonna go ahead and believe the one that's saying I'm already connected seeing as how I'm ... well ... connected.

I just needed to get that out of my system. Its quarter till 5am and I'm going to attempt at getting at least a few hours of sleep.

BTW, I didn't get any comments on my last entry ... not that I really care ... I'm just saying it'll give you something to read other than this.

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Odd feeling
Thursday. 8.23.07 1:45 pm
I feel really weird right now. I'm not quite sure why or exactly what it is that I'm feeling, but its not right. Like, I'm emotionally not into it today. I feel more down than usual. I hate to say that this is the type of thing that occurs right before something bad is about to happen. I had this kind of feeling a few days before the car accident we got into last week. We really can't afford to be in another accident.

But its not just a bad feeling either. Its a feeling ... I dunno ... almost that I'm completely alone? Or maybe feeling unloved? Not necessarily by my family, but just in general. I have no one out here at all. I feel kind of like the last time I was out in Vegas. The only difference is that I'm not freshly out of a bad relationship and my heart hasn't been freshly ripped into a million pieces.

But just like the last time I was here, I have no one and I'm searching for a job, but am having no success. This really is starting to get to me.

All they hype that I had about my birthday is gone now. I care as much about this one as I have every other birthday that has passed. I realize that some of it is due to the fact that I have no friends out here and the possibility of spending it alone has crossed my mind more often than not recently. Whatever. It would be just like any other birthday that I've celebrated. I think the last one that I actually celebrated, was my 17th b-day. And before that it was my 13th b-day? I don't remember exactly if it was my 12th or 13th. So I seem to be celebrating my birthdays in 4 year intervals. . . except in this case.

If that were the pattern, then I should be celebrating my 21st with much enthusiasm. Unfortunately, it doesn't appear to be happening that way. Huh. You know what I just realized? I had wished that my b-day was on Feb. 29th so that I'd only have to really celebrate it once every 4 years. And oddly enough, even though my b-day is on a normal, regular day, it seems to be playing the way that I wanted it. Again, making this upcoming b-day the exception.

Even if I got a job tomorrow, I'm a little over a month away from turning 21; would I make a close enough friend to acually enjoy going out with to celebrate the illustrious day? I'm leaning more towards no right now.

Ugh, this is turning into an entry about how depressed I am about my b-day. But that's not the reason I seem to be carrying this burden of emotion. I just ... I dunno. I just hope this passes soon. I hate being like this; it seems that it adds to the depression.

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Take out
Wednesday. 8.22.07 3:55 pm
Apparently someone cashed out up at mom's work and tipped them $50. So, evenly split between the two people working, my mom got $25. She texted us {my sister and I} asking if we wanted take out for dinner and if the answer was yes, we had to make our decision before she got home. And the answers food, edible food, etc were not acceptable.

So ... we're having take out for dinner. My sister and I discussed it and decided that, depending on how much money was available to spend {since ma hadn't told us our limit yet}, we'd either go with Ruby Tuesday {which I still haven't had} or KFC. When ma got home from work, I told her our decision, she told us the limit and we're going with KFC.

With 5 people living in this house, when it comes to take out or eating out, it takes a little bit of time for everyone to decide and agree on where to go and what to eat. There have been times {before I moved back in} where my mom ended up going to 3 different fast food places because no one could agree on what they wanted. My mom doesn't mind as long as its within a reasonable driving distance. Nothing too far out of the way.

Anywho, mom is off work tomorrow so the car will be available. I'm not sure yet what we're going to do. It'll be the last time we'll be able to do anything that involves staying out late because my mom has to work this weekend and my sister starts school on Monday. I mean, sure, I'll be able to go out and stay out till whenever I want once I get a working schedule and my own car, but who knows when that'll happen. And my sister will be able to go out and stay out later on weekends because she's got her boyfriend. But for the three of us {myself, mom and my sister} to go out, this is the last chance we'll have until the next break in school.

Uhm, I'm not sure if I mentioned this on here or not so if I did, I'm saying it again. I have mentioned that I was planning on going back to Tucson for about a week in the beginning of October so that I could go drinking with the people who wanted to take me drinking and also so that I could hang with some of my friends who were still underage. I'm not going to be making that trip until March. I won't have the money by the beginning of October and I also don't think it wise for me to be driving across the state alone with only having had my license for a mere 3 weeks. So now the plan is for me to take a week off in March and go out there during their Spring Break. This way I'll have had plenty of time to plan and save up money and also I won't have to worry about school interfering with spending time with anyone.

Ugh! I don't want to have to wait until August '08 for Breaking Dawn {book 4 of the Twilight series} to come out, but according to the web site, it won't be out any sooner. It also seems to be going with the pattern of one book out each year, with New Moon and Eclipse coming out in August '06 and August '07, respectively.

Anywho, this seems to be a longer entry than planned, but I guess I had a lot to say. I can't think of anything else worthwhile to write about right now so I shall end this entry here.

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Cilohocla
Tuesday. 8.21.07 3:51 pm
Here, Jon. Here is my "update."

Yesterday I actually got up before 10am. I took a shower and did some dishes. Then I got on the comp for a little bit while my sister did some cleaning.

After a little bit, I made some phone calls to the places that I applied at. Only one was somewhat promising and even then its not a definate. Other places flat out told me if they were interested in hiring me, they'd call me. It was quite rude. So I put stars by those places so I would know not to call them again.

Around 1ish, Tony came over to pick up Lori. I went out with them because I needed to go to Target to return a couple shirts I had bought. I bought them without the time to try them on, otherwise I wouldn't have bought them. I ended up going with them to PetCo afterwards because Tony needed a heat lamp for his new snake.

Before we went anywhere, though, we stopped by Tony's place so that he could get his snake. His sister sold her to him, including the tank, the mice, and some other stuff for only $200. The snake is a 2 yr old 4ft long ball python. She looks a little shabby right now because she's molting, but when she's done, she'll look beautiful. Her name is Cilohocla, which is actually alcoholic spelled backwards. I think its kinda funny.

The only person in Tony's family that knows about the snake {besides his sister} is his dad. No one else in the house knows about it. Unfortunately, while at Target, we ran into Tony's grandmother. Tony had Cilohocla around his neck. So what Lori and Tony did was tell her that the snake was mine so she wouldn't get suspicious. It apparently worked.

I got munchie food. Before we came home yesterday we stopped by mom's work so that we could say hi and get something to drink. I gave mom $20 so that she could get me more water and some munchie food. So I now have Hershey's Assorted Miniatures and Reese's and Kit-Kat miniatures. Tasty stuff.

Anywho, I haven't done anything today. I didn't get up as early, but I was still up before noon. The AGT 2 hour season finale is on tonight. They're going to be announcing who won the million dollars. There are two people that I want to win, the other two, not so much. One of the people in the top 4, in my opinion, shouldn't have even made it through to the top 10, but hey, I can't control who the rest of America votes for. I can only decide who I want to vote for.

Uhm, this hasn't been one of my most organized entires, but it'll have to do. I'm not going to rewrite it. And with that, I'm done. Till next time.

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