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Speak to My Finger
Meowing WAR

Books I have completed reading since January 2018:

1. No Man's Nightingale - Ruth Rendell
2. One Day - David Nicholls
3. The Door - Margaret Atwood
Please don't kill my brain cells
Wednesday. 5.2.07 9:45 am
I had a rather long holiday from work this week. Imagine yesterday was Labour Day and today is another public holiday for Wesak day. And then tomorrow I will be attending some workshop. And then the next day I will be heading to Penang with my manager-who-wants-face.

Although it's a long weekend, I spent those hours replaying my conversation with two people I had earlier before the holidays. One is with the office jerk and the other is someone from damn famous environmental NGO worldwide. Let's start with the office male jerk.

If you have been following my blog entries, you will definitely know I have a renaye 'fan' out there who calls my office just to say hi to me. He called me on Monday - again. He really freaks me. Which fan will constantly call you to say hello?? If it's on my cell, I'm less freaky. I told that jerk to reveal every caller of mine before forwarding to me... so I could always be mentally prepared ... not only to my fan but to all of my clients.

So I innocently answered the call. And yay! it's from my fan. No choice. Have to keep on talking. I told him in a nice way that I'm not interested to have a boyfriend at the moment and I'm only interested to be ou friend ONLY. He said no worries because all girlfriends and boyfriends started out as friends FIRST. Wah ... so positive thinking. Bad for me. And then I told him I can't talk to you long because I'm coughing and having flu. Then he said I got sick because of my monthly p.e.r.i.o.d. Excuse me? I can't get sick because I was drenched in the rain from head to toe twice?

I managed to bat him off. And that male jerk was laughing while listening to my conversation.

I told the jerk to please think of my safety nicely. If my fan could think of calling me up, there's always a possibility of him showing up at my office. Don't worry. If he did that, I will invite you all to my funeral. That jerk laughed at the SAFETY word. Do you, especially if you are a girl, think it's funny? I asked him if you have ever been stalked before? He said yes. Ok. Good. Then why are you not understanding my feelings?

He added "But I'm a guy. So what if the girl rape me? I got nothing to lose" in an stupidest male egoistic manner. That point fried my brain cells. I realised I'm working with a guy that doesn't care of his fellow workmate safety. I feel like I'm in a danger zone. I feel sad for him. I feel sad for his future girlfriend.

Even I - an "oppresser and a surpresser" of guys' rights - won't make a joke like that. I would just tease guys but not jeopardising my male friends' safety and trust in me.

And then my mind wandered to my other workmates. And then I realised I'm all alone - all alone - in my working environment.

The second conversation I had was actually more of a correspondence. I was asking him if my mother, a fulltime housewife, could participate in his volunteer project in conserving the turtles in Melaka. You know what he said?

"Sorry if I addressed you incorrectly (i hope you don't mind cause i was simply adopting the name attached to the email address). Don't worry we do take in people from diverse backgrounds. Our only concern here is that bare in mind that it's nothing like a holiday, as this is hardcore field conservation work and it can get very physical and the conditions are not at all condusive for a normal living. I'm not sure if you would one to put your loved one through all that cause it may be very challenging; but only for those who are not used to the camping environment."

I have informed my mum the conditions before asking the guy if my mum could volunteer. Do you think she's that weak. What if my mum is just 40 years old and been on those 4 wheel drive in Siberia? Man. Don't judge a book by its cover.

And worse thing is this guy don't bother to see my name signature of my email. And you got the guts to say you are adopting the name attached to my email address. So unprofessional. So what if I'm a Tan Sri and my honourable title is not attached to the email? Man. You got to think further than your turle nest.

That's all for the complains.

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Whatever Monday
Monday, April 30, 2007
I'm having flu and cough. It sucks and I'm at work. That sucks more.

I think my blog need a new outlook but I got no idea what to do with it. So at the mean time, I might just make everything transparent because I'm just too tired to look at flowery backgrounds. And it sucks that I can't manage to get modules on the right not only on the left. Man. I'm mad.

And before starting work, I was telling one of my workmates that we shouldn't bother about arrogant and backstabbing people due to karma. So I asked the male jerk in my office to explain what is karma knowing he knows much more than me. But then, I was under torrential attack verbally by gibbering that some Chinese religions don't believe in Karma ... Indian religions don't believe in Karma ... and damn ... Chinese don't believe in karma. What the hell??

I have never ever been this mad on a Monday MORNING. So I declared WAR on him by not talking to him the whole day. This has alleviated my mood tremendously and I feel so much happier.

That jerk deserves it. Bwahahahaha.

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Meow is Alive!
Friday. 4.27.07 9:20 am
Meow people.

Thank you so much for visiting my blog although you will be wondering what happened to my wallpaper and the transparency. Right. I was just experimenting with the css codes for the past few days. Haha. What You See Is What I Did. Haha. Of course, this time it's another failure.

I just can't seem to have left and right modules. I cut and paste a lot of css codes onto my blog and no results. Damn tired.

And ... there's no internet in my house at the moment. No idea what happened but the technicians are working on the problem.

And ... I'm having sore throat. Right. Hopefully I don't get fever.

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Pandang Belakang Idiot! [Look Behind]
Sunday, April 22, 2007
I'm aware of the title.

That's because I went to watch a horror Malaysian movie called Jangan Pandang Belakang. The English translation title is Don't Look Back. Right. I thought it will be cool to supoport and watch local movie. So I chose this movie. No idea who is the director and the actors especially the person in designing the hantu [ghost] for the movie. Mr. A thought it was crap and I thought it can be improved. But I really feel it's better to use a real human than using some plaster and bamboo stick to create the hantu.

Beginning was good. Not so scary. And then later, it was getting scarier. Someone even screamed at the sound of the microwave beep. I was still 'ok'. But the frequency of my hand dipping into the popcorn increased. And Mr. A was laughing. In fact, all of the audience were.

You bet I didn't scream? Wrong, people. I did. But only for a short while. My mind was wandering a bit while watching this particular scene: the hantu was sitting at the passenger seat and of course our hero didn't see it and then there was a guy from the highway wanted to give assistance to the hero. HAHA. This guy saw the hantu floating behind the hero. And I SCREAMED. Because my mind came back from wandering and saw something disgusting on the screen.

Thank god. I was not the only one who screamed. And there was also a scene like The Ring: the hantu was crawling not out of the tv but from some kitchen. Funny. But I shut my eyes. Because I just don't like to see a hantu without a face.

Ending? Just like your average expectation. Sweet as.

You know I once saw a woman with long hair trying to have a look on me from my upper deck of my bed. But I only saw the hair. Not the face. Thank god.

Another one was ... the night I moved out of college hostel. I was living in my newly rented room. And I could feel someone standing outside of my room door. A woman. I can't see her face because she was looking at the ground. She had long hair. Dressed in white. A long white gown. Frizzy fringe. She just stood outside of my room door for 2 nights. Sometimes I could feel her presence in the house. But I told her to please let me sleep in peace. And I had since then.

Any ghost stories to share with me?

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Short story
Saturday, April 21, 2007
jolenesiah was telling me her occurring nightmare - something like that - last night. And she is weaving them into a story. I read it and I was just wondering what is the ending but she said she doesn't know. And then it gave me an idea to write a story that very night. What gave me the enthusiasm was related to something I read in the office earlier. The article I read in the office was about this author writing 350 words of short story every morning just to get his brain working. Right. So I decided to take up the challenge for myself.

I wrote this story within 30 minutes. Seriously. I didn't bring it out well so most likely it won't enter my writing corner. But if you were in my head, you would then understand the storyline better. Enjoy people.


How long have I been running? How long have I been running in these woods??? Why is there no ending??? What am I running from???

Pearl didn’t recall anything except the strong urge to run as fast as she could. There was blood everywhere on her but she could not recall how she got them. She could not even remember if she had injured herself. All she knew was to run like a wind.

She was panting. Panting hard. The cool air of the night burned her lungs but she didn’t care. She didn’t care if her lungs burned into ashes as long she runs like the wind. She didn’t care if her aching legs melted on the spot as long she runs like the wind. She didn’t care if she had lost her directions in the woods as long she runs like the wind. She knew she would regret until the day she dies if she heeds her instinct. And her instinct was telling her to sprint.

She kept looking back. Nothing was behind her but she kept running despite her feet screaming of tiredness and her arms roaring of tensions. The only strength she had now was to clutch a silver hook pendant in her right palm. The glow from the pendant against the moonlight boosted her energy to run.

She kept on running but suddenly her feet pulled to a complete halt. The pendant was held closed to her bosom. She peered at the edge. If her feet didn’t stop, she would have plunged down the cliff. She shut her eyes and think hard. So intense was her brainstorming her head was throbbing and birds were flying around her head like a halo.

No. I cannot stop here. I will just climb down, thought Pearl.

“No. You are not climbing down here,” said a slender and meek looking guy with his arms crossed, standing a few meters away from Pearl.

Her eyes widened with horror with a small ‘o’.

“See you, Nefri,” replied Pearl with a broken tone. And she jumped.

Nefri ran towards her but it was too late. She had jumped.

She felt like she was flying in the air. And she felt free like a bird. She smiled.

I’m going to be free … thought Pearl. Her brain system shut off and she fell into a deep sleep …


Pearl could feel a soft caress across her face. Warm and comforting. She could feel the strong feeling of love in every stroke.

She opened her eyes gently and a soft orange colour ceiling greeted her. She could hear the fire crackle in a distance. The crackling soothed her mind. Gathering up all her strength, she averted her eyes to the direction of the caress.

“Welcome back, my love,” greeted a young man with tanned looking skin. He continued to stroke her hair tenderly.

Her heart ached as if an arrow has gone through it. Tears streaked her pallid face. She turned away from him even though she could see crease of worriless painted on his forehead and the eyes filled with excruciating hurt.

But she didn’t care. She just wished she was as dead as a corpse.

Sahidiwara pecked on her cheek and left the room for her to rest.

She closed her eyes and dreamed of freedom that very night.

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My anime list
Friday, April 20, 2007
Interested to know what anime I have seen? Check out here

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