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Memores acti prudentes futuri

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no surprise, no mystery
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
~ Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
~ William Blake
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It's just another day
Sunday, February 14, 2010
I don't know how I feel about time, or days, or weeks.

Hours, minutes, seconds. Dates on the calendar. Appointments that must be kept.

It's all very constraining. Of course I see the practicality of it all, but still, I often wish these labels and boundaries didn't exist.


Boyfriend Dearest got my package today. He said the people who told him about it kept laughing.

They probably would've laughed more if they knew what was inside.

He... didn't understand the first one in the beginning. I had to tell him I'd been going around telling people I gave my boyfriend HIV for Valentine's Day before he got the joke. X|

I still don't know what he got me, although he said he bought one of those big fancy cards with sound. :P

Kinda wondering if I should've sent a card. I've no inspiration... :|

My reaction to his joking "will you be my valentine?" was as inappropriately unsubstantial as ever... so basically I just laughed.

I do not give direct answers.

There are things that need to be done. I don't want to do them.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...
Saturday, February 13, 2010
And by "brings all the boys to the yard" I really mean "makes me gag every few minutes in anticipation of throwing up in the near future."

Where did I find this wondrous milkshake, you may ask? Well, let me recount to you the events of my day...

The first half of it was pretty typical. Got up, went to go eat, came back and... did not do much. And then I took a nap at around 4:45 PM. Woke up at six because Casey texted me and told me we were going to the hookah bar at eight, and we were going to meet up with some people at Montgoris beforehand.

So I went back to sleep... dreamt the hookah bar was some dude's house... woke up at seven thirty due to another text, and headed to the dining hall.

We had some food and then walked down to the hookah bar. For some reason we took the long and icy/snowy route, so it took longer than it should have to get there.

Once there, they did not bother to ID us, though we had all brought out our IDs. We ordered a combo appetizer (fries, chicken, mozzarella sticks... and four little cups of sauce; what kind of sauce is uncertain.)

I didn't really want to try the hookah (which was strawberry flavored). So... I got a milkshake to sip at. It was okay, but honestly, Johnny Rockets makes them better. Better, cheaper, and bigger.

I ended up trying the hookah after awhile. It was.... okay I guess? I wouldn't do it again. It made me feel light-headed and I giggled for about a minute, but after that nothing happened.

Got another milkshake, which was a big mistake. I started to feel really sick, which was probably a result of the greasy food, milkshakes, and hookah.

Had to go outside a couple of times, which... helped very little. Eventually I just walked back with one of the other girls who came with us.

And.... now I am listening to opera on the radio. It's not bad, actually. Much better than whatever hip-hop/rap junk is on all the other stations.

OH! Also, my mom called and told me that my eleventh grade English teacher reads my poem (The Barrel and the Maiden) to all his classes.

Yay. :D

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In such a situation
Friday, February 12, 2010
Girl: UH, EXCUSE ME? When you left you bumped me, so next time could you say 'excuse me' when you go?
Me: Okay, I'll do it if you'd please ask me before you use my chair.
Girl: Well you weren't IN HERE and there was NOWHERE else to sit, unless you want me to sit on your BED.
Me: Um, no.
Girl: Then we're settled.

Fact: there was another place to sit-- the chair belonging to my roommate, whose friend this girl is.

Fact: I was outside of the room for a good twenty minutes before I returned, meaning she waited that long to give me attitude.
Opinion on said fact: um, if it happened once, let it go. If it happens five times, then you probably have a right to say something.

Additional commentary:


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We had a snow day
Thursday, February 11, 2010
So they canceled my counseling appointment.

Guess I ought to try again tomorrow.

Ironically enough I was feeling fine before this happened.

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A quick one before bed [2P]
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Before I begin
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Have a look at this video:

That's not related to this entry in any way. At least, I don't intend it to be.

I called up Info Tech about my connection issues. The guy said they'd send someone over to look at the jack.

School is canceled tomorrow. Supposedly we're going to get a big storm... There isn't any snow right now though, and it's almost forty degrees. Hmmm, what?

Boyfriend Dearest called me today. We talked about.... something. Or other. I was kinda out of it the first time he called because I had been taking a nap and I just woke up right before the phone rang.

I was having a dream that I dragged my bed into the lobby of the building and was sitting there trying to get a wireless connection when Boyfriend Dearest came for a surprise visit. I ran over to him and hugged him and he was really cold... :S Like, no body heat.

That dream was too realistic to be any good. And I don't mean realistic like "this would actually happen," I mean it like "nothing excessively outlandish happened." Disappointing.

Also dreamt that my phone fell on the floor, so when it started ringing I was confused and unsure of where it was at first.

This is the kind of thing that someone tells you right after saying "oh, I had this weird dream last night!" And afterwards you're like "wtf that wasn't weird."

It's so annoying when people do that. You get all excited because there's the possibility of hearing something interesting and then they say "I dreamt... my cat was black! And it isn't black! I don't even have a cat!"

That's not really weird, it's just kind of boring. Seriously.

I don't want to go to Philosophy.... I hate sitting in that class for three hours and just wanting time to move faster so I can leave. Unfortunately we have a test today though, so I can't really skip it or anything. Not that I would anyway...

Meh... I'm kinda hungry but I don't want to eat. I have class in about an hour, too.

Counseling on Thursday... ha...


I love old commercials. They're so hilarious and zombifying.

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My internet isn't working right [2P]
Monday, February 8, 2010
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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I seem to have forgotten
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Did I ever mention getting my MBT shoes? I don't think I did...

Anyway, here they are:

Love love LOVE them. Heh. It's a good thing I like them, too, because I don't think I can buy shoes for awhile now...

My entries have kind of been devoid of pictures lately, so I figured I'd try and take some.

TEA. 'Twas once my favorite, but now is just kinda okay.

I bought this with the intent of reading it, but so far not much has happened...

I don't know why I took a picture of my clock. I like my clock, though, so maybe that justifies it.

Oh, and if you're wondering why I have three toothbrushes... uh... I do not know. But dental hygiene is good.

This is my calendar. I would've liked something a bit different but this is okay.

My wall, which Casey likes to compare to a ransom note.

We are thinking about ordering food tonight because neither of us really wants to go to Montgoris... I'm hoping we actually go through with this.

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