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Memores acti prudentes futuri


So when I start to see some face in neon dreams
engulfed in fantasies, the world seems more inviting
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
~ Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
~ William Blake
TICoSME
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I did this mostly all day
Friday, June 18, 2010
Well, after pancakes with Lucy and Varsha.



I have... twelve more videos or something. XP



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What... who... what?
Thursday, June 17, 2010
[random stranger] has entered the room.
[Angie]: varsha?
[random stranger]: Who me?
[Me]: new SN?
[Lucy]: hey varsha?
[random stranger]: I'm just a random.....but lets gossip about ZSuttonPhoto. Yes?
[Angie]: um...
[Angie]: who let you in?
[random stranger]: ahaha
[Lucy]: i'm confused
[Me]: wtf
[Angie]: well you did pick a common room name
[Me]: I didn't realize other people could invite themselves to chatrooms?
[Lucy]: nice to meet you new person
[random stranger]: Pancakes is probably the most common room name ever
[Me]: we were actually talking about pancakes
[random stranger]: Ello [Lucy]a
[Lucy]: hello
[random stranger]: Oh snap. Whats everyones fav type of pancake?
[random stranger]: Catch me up to speed
[random stranger]: I have alot to offer
[Angie]: well we did stop talking about pancakes..
[Angie]: but i like banana
[Me]: uh...
[random stranger]: I'm a fan of Blueberry, call it old school, but whatever
[Me]: I don't have a preference...
[Lucy]: butter and jam's good
[Me]: um, but anyway
[Me]: cherry picking
[Angie]: right
[Me]: did you guys want to go?
[Lucy]: sure!
[Me]: I was looking at a list of places
[random stranger]: No, seriously though, a couple hours ago, a few photography friends of mine started a chatroom with the title being 'pancakes', they obviously have since left. I am just late to the party
[Angie]: ah
[Angie]: that's funny
[random stranger]: I'll let you be, take care everyone
[Lucy]: bye!
[Me]: alright... bye
[random stranger] has left the room.
[Me]: that was f*****g weird

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Remember that other entry about squirrels?
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Well, I got a video of some squirrel haps.


(I trimmed it down quite a bit... my Flip was recording for awhile before the squirrel decided to show up)

We're thinking of new obstacles for the squirrel. Any suggestions?

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It Would Be Nice [DP]
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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I swear this tastes better than it looks
Friday, June 11, 2010
I made dinner tonight (again). Pesto salmon with Israeli couscous and Caesar salad...

The salad isn't pictured because I'm pretty sure everyone already knows what that looks like.

It actually looks like someone threw up on it, doesn't it? XP It tastes awesome though, I promise.

I saw the Tillamook Loaf Love Tour bus today, but didn't take any pictures, sorry. It's a really cute little VW van, and they gave us a $1 off coupon for cheese. :D

Yesterday I went to visit my favorite high school teacher. He actually recognized me, which made me happy. I was worried he'd say something like "oh hi Erica!" (It's ONLY happened TWO or THREE times before...)

But no, he remembered me. Unfortunately he was busy, so we didn't get to chat much, but it was nice to see him. He had a sort of a buzzcut, and I was afraid to ask about it in case he said something like "oh I have cancer and I had to go through chemotherapy"...

Last night/this morning I hung out with Alice. My mom dropped me off at her house around midnight and we walked around and talked a bit. I stayed until a little after four. New record!

We're kind of worried she'll grow dependent on me. I mean, I'd like to believe that won't happen, but it kind of already is... at least she's got a psychiatrist to talk to as well.

My parents bought a big bag of peanuts, so we've been throwing them outside for the squirrels. Sometimes we hide them under pots and the like to see if they can get them. So far all the peanuts seem to have been found. Fun fun.

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Amused and confused
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
(As I usually am when I'm not just depressed?)



I went ice skating with Alice today, which was not much fun. One of the local high schools was having a fundraiser there, so there were a bunch of people just standing around on the ice and hanging out. I only fell down once, but I was worried the entire time that I'd bump into someone.

We also looked at the furniture/shower setups in a Eurbana, which was cool.

After that we went to Barnes & Noble, where I got a book about interior design (it was on sale!). I didn't know they had a whole section about interior design, but it was an awesome find.

So... I might possibly major in that? I have to research it a bit, but it's definitely something to consider.

---Edit---

Me: would you rather date a girl with no legs or three legs
Dude: three
Me: what if the third one was coming out of her shoulder
Dude: still better then pushing around a wheel chair

Me: okay what if it was just that in the womb she had a twin but they merged in a really weird way so she also has an arm growing out of the back of her knee
Dude: well shed probably be really insecure and let me get in bed with her really early on
Dude: and then i'd cut that fucker off
Dude: id be doing her a favor
Me: gross
Me: you'd get so much blood on your sheets
Dude: my sheets? fuck that, her bed,
Me: I think she'd break up with you
Dude: yeah but in like 3 weeks she'd come back to me when she realizes how great life is without that extra arm
Me: what about the leg growing out of her shoulder?
Me: and that would hurt like a mofo
Dude: id do the same thing
Dude: maybe id drug her or something
Me: boy, you sure are cold hearted
Dude: I WOULD BE HELPING
Me: WITHOUT HER PERMISSION
Dude: only because she doesn;t know any better
Dude: parents do it all the time
Me: that's kind of different
Me: this girl would be like, the same age as you
Dude: but i'm a man so it doesnt matter
Dude: i mean
Dude: wait
Dude: what


Well... after a few amateur surgeries...

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Birthday present-ish?
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
I helped my brother write a poem (meaning I wrote it for him) for this contest he wants to enter. If you win you receive a longboard.

I probably shouldn't post it before the contest is over though, so nothing for now. At some point in the future though, it will probably appear here. Just lettin' ya know.

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I shouldn't be up at such hours
Monday, June 7, 2010
"Happy Man" by Covenant is playing on Pandora...

I don't love anyone
I'm a happy man, yes I'm a happy man


Are love and happiness important factors in each other's existence?

I know people can be fine without love, and happiness is optional for a few.

I'm not sure if any of this will make sense, since it's four in the morning here and I'm a bit zoned out.

So then, this is what I'm thinking:

Happiness without love = emptiness?
Love without happiness = desperation?

I tend to associate love with happiness, but only when it's mutual. One sided love is probably pretty devoid of happiness unless the individual in question is quite removed from reality.

Yeah I don't know. I should go to bed.

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