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My Unkymood Punkymood (Unkymoods)
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a little tmi, a rant and other things
Sunday. 9.6.09 6:29 pm
I haven't had any kind of alcohol in about a month and I wanted to drink today. So at quarter after 11 this morning, I took my first shot of Jagermeister. After about 10 or so minutes I did this again. And over the course of the following 45 minutes I ended up with 5 shots of Jager in me. Not a lot if you think about it, but enough to definitely make me feel it.

So what's the issue? I had just finished eating a fun size Three Musketeers bar prior to taking shots. I find out the hard way about two hours later that Jager and Three Musketeers don't mix. I don't feel quite as shitty as I normally do when I've sobered up after drinking, but I still don't feel too good.

I'm going to rant, again, about how sick of this place I am, again. Nothing has really triggered it this time, which is odd. Usually something happens and then I want to leave. This time, nothing really, but I still want out.

Have you ever wanted to get away, but there was literally nowhere on Earth you could go that would make you happy? I want to escape to the stars. I want to be up there, out there looking down on the Earth. Looking over at Venus or Mars, depending on which side of the Earth I've managed to escape on. Is it even possible to see Venus or Mars from just outside the Earth? I don't even know, but in my own fantasy world, you can.

Over the last week I've been working as best I could to keep myself calm. Ever since finding out that Jacob will be having his surgery this month, I feel like I've been working overtime to not freak out. The thing is, even if I found out two or three months in advance, I'd still probably be exactly the same way.

I knew this surgery was eventually going to have to happen. And for some reason I don't think I'd ever be ready enough. No matter how much time I had to prepare myself. . . Wait!!!

What the hell am I saying? I'm not the one who's going under the knife. I'm talking like its me! Maybe this is my issue. I don't know. I'm still nervous about it, though, because it's someone who I deeply care about who's going in for a dangerous surgery. If all goes well he'll be healthier than he has been.

We just don't know the exact date yet. All I know is that it's soon.

So yeah. I feel like ish. I want to leave planet Earth. And I'm nervous about Jacob's upcoming surgery.

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I got a nice surprise today
Friday. 9.4.09 11:46 pm
Work was the same as always. The only good thing: it was Friday and there's a long weekend ahead of me. Labor day is Monday and the warehouse is closed so that means no work.

After work, I called up Jacob to see if he wanted company and I ended up going over there. After about an hour or so, I heard something outside. It was either rain or strong winds. Since it was sunny and hot on the way over to his house, I assumed strong winds.

Boy, was I wrong.

It was pouring!!! I don't know where it came from, but it was amazing. We both rushed to put shoes on and went outside to play in the rain. After about 10 minutes of standing in the rain it began to hail! Amazing stuff.

We were out in the rain for a good 15, 20 minutes before going back inside. Our clothes were completely soaked so we threw them in the dryer.

It was nice putting on warm clothes after getting rain-soaked.

Tomorrow I get to see Tim. It'll be the last time for a while. I'll explain later when I have more details. I'm going to tell him in the morning that I'll be seeing him so he can remember to bring the pictures from Germany.

I'm so glad we have a three day weekend. I need a break from work. Even if it is only just an extra day off on the weekend. It's a much needed break.

No big plans for the weekend; just hanging out. But still. I could get some much needed rest.

Damn you cravings! I really want McDonald's right now. Do I have the money for it? Not at all. Am I going to get a sandwich anyway? Possibly. I don't know. Probably not. I'm getting food tomorrow. It can wait 12 more hours ... I hope.

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yeah, I'm bored
Wednesday. 9.2.09 1:34 pm
Wednesday. As if you guys didn't already know that.

Obviously I seem to have a lot to say. Heh.

I suppose I've managed to start a rumor and the two people I've told {in confidence so I guess it's not really a rumor if it's not being spread} have completely agreed with me. There are these two characters at work who appear to be very much in a relationship. And if they're not, then they should be. The way his face lights up when she walks around the corner. The way they interact with each other; how they both are always in laughing, smiling moods around one another. It is pretty cute. They even park next to each other in the parking lot, though they come in and leave at different times from each other. I guess it's just the idea of parking next to the person you like. I can understand that. I did it for months. I still do when the opportunity arises.

I want to run into them in public just so that it can be confirmed. It's the type of situation that even if true, when confronted, it would be denied. Rules are rules and this would be breaking them, but its just so darn cute they way they are around each other. I wasn't the only one who noticed. I was just the only one who came out and said something.

Gotta love work drama. No matter where you go, you won't be able to avoid it.

Anywho, I'm so glad that I can eat normally again. Stuffing my face with a sandwich from Jack-in-the-Box this morning was wonderful. I was also starving so it was gone in a matter of about 5 minutes. I bought three and ate two this morning. I'm saving the other one for tomorrow's lunch. I dunno what I'm going to do for lunch on Friday.

Alright, I'm pretty tired. I think I'm going to nap. Or play a video game. Either way.

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and so it begins again
Sunday. 8.30.09 7:32 pm
The only benefit to having a job like this is that it's routine. The money is the biggest reason anyone has a job, but the routine of it gets me out of my house on a regular basis. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure I'd end up as a semi-hermit. I only say "semi" because I do tend to leave my house on weekends. But during the week, I only really go to and from work.

Monday is always the hardest day of the week. Or just the day in which you happen to go back to work after more than a day off. For example, next week Tuesday will be hard for me because I'll have just finished a three day weekend {due to the building being closed for Labor Day.}

Anywho, I can eat actual food again. The blister is still there and it's really sensitive to hot foods, flavor-wise. I ate some buffalo wings from Wendy's last night {really good, btw} and every time the sauce hit my blister it stung. Same thing with the flaming hot Cheetos. Either way, I'm happy that I can eat normally again.

There is a catch ... I can't afford to buy anything. I really, really don't like using my credit card {especially since I only have a few hundred left, total} but in this type of situation, that's all I have. As soon as Blockbuster takes out their money for the month, my bank account will be negative and there's really nothing I can do about it right now.

I'm trying to think of something that I can buy that I can cook that will last me the whole two weeks until I get paid again. Nothing is really coming to mind. Besides maybe spaghetti salad ... I might have to make that. One pound of cooked spaghetti should be able to last a single person two weeks, shouldn't it?

I really want Carl's Jr. I just want their jalapeno chicken sandwich and some chili cheese fries ... maybe for my birthday ... if I have the money. I'll probably just settle for the cake. Something no person should be without on their birthday.

Uhm, so yeah. It's almost quarter till 8 right now. I should probably sleep. My alarm is set for 2am.

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thursday is not friday
Thursday. 8.27.09 4:03 pm
Every Thursday for the past who knows how long, I always seem to be continuously reminding myself that I still have one more night to work. That today is not Friday and I do not get the next day off. It's terribly frustrating.


Anywho, I'm still on my yogurt and pudding diet. However, I've discovered that if I eat things in little, tiny pieces and chew slowly I can eat normal food. So whenever I do happen to have normal food, I'm eating like a toddler. I'm looking very forward to being able to stuff my mouth again without worry of taking another chunk out of the inside of my lower lip.

The swelling has gone down some, but the white blister mark is still very there. And it hurts. I have a feeling it won't be completely gone over the course of tomorrow. One can still hope though, right?

I'm pretty tired. Maybe I'll go to bed early today. Here's to hoping I'll actually get some reasonable, decent sleep tonight.

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no chewing
Tuesday. 8.25.09 6:13 pm
Today was the first time in a while that I left my apartment after I had already showered for the day. And it wasn't to bring food to Jake. I needed to go to the grocery store, but on my way home I decided I'd just put it off again. I knew that I had bread at home so I could still make PB&J ...

I did just that, but I couldn't finish it. Why, you ask?

A couple days ago I bit the inside of my lower lip pretty hard and it left a blister. Over the last couple days, though, I've still been able to chew gum and eat regular food. Well today, I was almost finished with my sandwich when chomp! I bit down hard on that blister. If I'm not mistaken, I'm pretty sure I even took a small chunk out of what was already healing.

That sucker hurts! Even when I talk I can feel my teeth up against it. So over the next few days I'm restricting myself to a yogurt and pudding diet. Basically any kind of food that doesn't require me to chew it. So ice cream is still a go. But gum is not. I have to go three days without chewing gum. Ugh.

Luckily Food 4 Less had yogurt on sale for $.50 a piece. I bought ten. I'm really hoping it's healed enough so I can eat normal by the weekend. Otherwise it's back to Food 4 Less to buy more yogurt.

It's starting to cool off a little, finally. The last few days it's only gotten up to 99. At night it feels nice. When I leave my apartment to go to work {at 2:40am} it's only in the 70s. I can't wait until it only gets into the 70s during the day.

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