Someone in the chatroom said I'm better than Pandora. :D

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In a conversation with an OKC buddy, I realized something.

First of all, I don't wear jewelry or bother with accessories (unless you count hats and armwarmers or bandannas, which I don't, really).

He asked me if I wore earrings or necklaces, and I said no, I don't.

But I think it's because I don't like to wear jewelry that doesn't have a special significance to me.

Back when I was dating my first boyfriend I wore his temporary dog tags and the ring he gave me for Christmas on a chain around my neck, and I rarely took it off because it was important to me.

When I signed up to be a marrow donor, they gave me a purple wristband, and I wore that constantly too, because what it stood for mattered to me.

Even the moodring I used to wear had some significance... I didn't have enough tickets to buy it at the prize counter at the Boardwalk, so my friend said he'd get it for me if I kissed him. I didn't end up kissing him, but it's an amusing memory.

I kind of miss those tokens of meaning.

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I've been going on the INFP chatroom sort of connected to the forum I joined three months ago or so, and people in there were like "oh, you're so and so from the forum! Your posts are really awesome! You're like a forum celebrity!"

:3

I was really surprised, to say the least. Flattered, though! People notice me! And like what I have to say! I feel so special. XP

'Cause like, you guys here know me, and we're all buddies, but I've only been there for a few months, so it's really odd.

...Oh jeez I've been in the chatroom for like seven hours. :0

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Tuesday:

Boyfriend: My capacity to fly solo is greatly diminished when I'm over worked.
Me: Not surprising.
Boyfriend: As such, I miss you.

Today:

Me: Wait, so are we hanging out this weekend at some point?
Boyfriend: I fucking hope so.
Probably Friday night.
If I don't, I'll fucking kill someone.
Me: Well, it's always you that has to cancel, not me.
Boyfriend: Oh, I know.
If something comes up.
If something comes up.
I'll kill everyone.
I swear on Jesus's nipples.
I will kill everyone.
Me: Even me? :0
Boyfriend: Well, if I saw you then I wouldn't feel the need to murder people.

We're gonna go learn how to waltz on Friday!

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Bit too tired to think of a title different than the one of the song I'm listening to, which is this:


I had another dream about having a stalker last night. I think I've described a couple of the other ones on here already. Wonder if this is establishing itself as one of the residents in my recurrent dream theme collection... Or maybe the stalker dreams are a subsection of the chase dreams? It's hard to say.

Usually I think of the chase dreams as having an undefined pursuer, someone/something I don't know but have to evade. These stalker dreams are different because I always see who it is, and it's always a guy (not the same guy though, that would be really creepy).

The one in my latest dream... I don't remember what he looked like, but he was in my house somehow and he grabbed my wrist and wouldn't let go, and he was talking to me... what was he saying? I think it was something about how he was always seeing me around... and he was going to take me away somewhere... I remember being really scared by how controlling/possessive he seemed and the anger/intensity in the way he looked at me. Something distracted him, and I managed to run to my room and lock the door behind me and close the windows (my real room only has one, but my dream room had two). I was breathing so fast and hard that my chest hurt.

And then... I was running with my boyfriend away from either the stalker or a group of people. Whoever it was, they were trying to kill us. And I was terrified, but my boyfriend seemed calm enough. We ran into an elevator that had four buttons with the letters D, P, B, and R on them... I think we were on the P level, so I pressed B, but then hit R as an afterthought because I wanted to get as far away from where we were as possible. I'm not sure if we got away... I think I just woke up.

I can't remember any other dreams where I was running away from the people trying to kill me with a companion. There was that one where I had a husband (I think?) and we ran across the tops of skyscrapers and turned a minotaur into metal, but that didn't really have the trappings of a chase dream. It was more like a quest, and there was some happiness and confidence in it.

There was also the one where I was running with my ex, trying to avoid him getting executed or something, but that didn't involve me being in danger, just him.

I dunno. I've been having some actual nightmares lately. There was one recently that scared me so much I woke up, sat bolt upright, and ripped the earplugs out of my ears. When I looked at the clock it said 5:43 AM. X| I don't remember what was so frightening, but maybe that's for the best. (I have to wear earplugs to sleep now unless I'm extremely exhausted... otherwise every little noise keeps me awake)

---

Um... in other news, I went to my first writing group meeting on Friday. It went really well, although there were only four of us. I'm really glad that's happening... while I was biking there I was thinking that I felt really great and maybe I shouldn't participate in the study after all, because I'm fine on my own.

At night, my boyfriend came over and we went to the artwalk downtown, and none of the art was that spectacular, but we listened to a band play in Anno Domini (one of the galleries) and went to a cafe. We shared an almond torte (which was lovely), and he got coffee. I asked why he likes coffee (he was drinking it straight), and he said I could try some. I took a sip, and it was really awful, honestly, even though he said it was very good. Couldn't stand the bitterness. I also got my portrait done for five dollars, and the guy... made me look kind of like a dude in the picture. Like, he gave me a really... square jawline. :S (I might post a picture of it later)

After that, we went back to my house and watched movies. Had a laugh over Thumbelina and got bored by Indiana Jones while he fell asleep. I guess at least he didn't snore during the movie. Poor guy, he's always tired because he's got so much to do. :/ Plus his commute time is awful... like half an hour... We need to find him a new place to live.

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