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Memores acti prudentes futuri

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no surprise, no mystery
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
~ Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
~ William Blake
Online Radio

More Fun Shtuff
Newgrounds Audio Portal
Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics

Web Comics and Such
A Distant Soil (Some nudity)
The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff)
Axe Cop
Basic Instructions
Bear Nuts

Blue Milk Special
Cigarro & Cerveja
Conspiracy Friends!
Crunchy Bunches

Curia Regis
Cyanide and Happiness
dead winter (has some explicit stuff)
Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?)
Diesel Sweeties
Dumm Comics
Eat That Toast!
The End
Evil Diva
Evil Inc.
Existential Comics
The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon
For Lack of a Better Comic
Forming (Explicit)

Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?)
The Intrepid Girlbot
JBabb Comics
The Last Halloween
Last Train to Old Town
The League of Evil Genius

Legend of Bill
Living With Insanity (some nudity)
Love Me Nice
Married to the Sea
Meaty Yogurt
Medium Large
The Meek
The Moon Prince
Moth (Some nudity)
Mr. Lovenstein
Muddlers Beat

Natalie Dee
The Non-Adventures of Wonderella
Out There
Owen's Uncles
Phuzzy Comics
Political Cartoonists Index
Poorly Drawn Lines
The Property of Hate
Red Meat
Rice Boy
Robbie and Bobby
Rosscott, Inc.
Safely Endangered
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Savage Chickens
Scary Go Round
Scenes from a Multiverse
The Secret Knots
Serenity Rose
Stand Still. Stay Silent
Stinking Hellebore
Strong Female Protagonist
Tales of Pylea
Three Word Phrase (some nudity)
Tiny Kitten Teeth
Toothpaste for Dinner
Trying Human (Some nudity)
Two Guys and Guy

Wilde Life
Yellow Peril (PG-13)

Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics
The Abominable Charles Christopher
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
The Adventures of Ellie Connelly
American Hell
Bag of Toast
Bear in Mind
The Book of Biff
Camp Weedonwantcha
Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff)
Daisy is Dead
Dream Life
Ectopiary (Some nudity)
Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life
A Fine Example
Finn and Charlie are HITCHED

Green Wake
Gun Show
Hark! A Vagrant
Head Doctor Productions
Hello with Cheese
Helpful Figures
Hollow Mountain
IDK Comics
Inscribing Ardi
Kyle & Atticus
Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
Letters to a Wild Boar
Lovecraft is Missing

Meat and Plastic
Minimalism Sucks
Moon Town
The Nerds of Paradise
No Reason Comics
One Swoop Fell
Pictures for Sad Children
Raymondo Person
A Redtail's Dream
Roy's Boys (PG 13?)
Run Freak Run
Saint's Way
Sin Titulo
Split Lip
Spooky Doofus
Super Buzzkill
The Super Fogeys
The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston
Ugly Girl
2815 Monument

Pure Flash Awesomeness
Angry Alien
Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry
The Frown

Clients from Hell
Brian Despain
Creatures in My Head
Damn You Auto Correct!
Jhonen Vasquez's site
Overheard in New York
Passive Aggressive Notes
Friday, February 10, 2012
I've been going on the INFP chatroom sort of connected to the forum I joined three months ago or so, and people in there were like "oh, you're so and so from the forum! Your posts are really awesome! You're like a forum celebrity!"


I was really surprised, to say the least. Flattered, though! People notice me! And like what I have to say! I feel so special. XP

'Cause like, you guys here know me, and we're all buddies, but I've only been there for a few months, so it's really odd.

...Oh jeez I've been in the chatroom for like seven hours. :0

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He's been stressed lately...
Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Boyfriend: My capacity to fly solo is greatly diminished when I'm over worked.
Me: Not surprising.
Boyfriend: As such, I miss you.


Me: Wait, so are we hanging out this weekend at some point?
Boyfriend: I fucking hope so.
Probably Friday night.
If I don't, I'll fucking kill someone.
Me: Well, it's always you that has to cancel, not me.
Boyfriend: Oh, I know.
If something comes up.
If something comes up.
I'll kill everyone.
I swear on Jesus's nipples.
I will kill everyone.
Me: Even me? :0
Boyfriend: Well, if I saw you then I wouldn't feel the need to murder people.

We're gonna go learn how to waltz on Friday!

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My sexy ___ [DP]
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Down to rest
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Bit too tired to think of a title different than the one of the song I'm listening to, which is this:
Down to Rest by O'Death on Grooveshark

I had another dream about having a stalker last night. I think I've described a couple of the other ones on here already. Wonder if this is establishing itself as one of the residents in my recurrent dream theme collection... Or maybe the stalker dreams are a subsection of the chase dreams? It's hard to say.

Usually I think of the chase dreams as having an undefined pursuer, someone/something I don't know but have to evade. These stalker dreams are different because I always see who it is, and it's always a guy (not the same guy though, that would be really creepy).

The one in my latest dream... I don't remember what he looked like, but he was in my house somehow and he grabbed my wrist and wouldn't let go, and he was talking to me... what was he saying? I think it was something about how he was always seeing me around... and he was going to take me away somewhere... I remember being really scared by how controlling/possessive he seemed and the anger/intensity in the way he looked at me. Something distracted him, and I managed to run to my room and lock the door behind me and close the windows (my real room only has one, but my dream room had two). I was breathing so fast and hard that my chest hurt.

And then... I was running with my boyfriend away from either the stalker or a group of people. Whoever it was, they were trying to kill us. And I was terrified, but my boyfriend seemed calm enough. We ran into an elevator that had four buttons with the letters D, P, B, and R on them... I think we were on the P level, so I pressed B, but then hit R as an afterthought because I wanted to get as far away from where we were as possible. I'm not sure if we got away... I think I just woke up.

I can't remember any other dreams where I was running away from the people trying to kill me with a companion. There was that one where I had a husband (I think?) and we ran across the tops of skyscrapers and turned a minotaur into metal, but that didn't really have the trappings of a chase dream. It was more like a quest, and there was some happiness and confidence in it.

There was also the one where I was running with my ex, trying to avoid him getting executed or something, but that didn't involve me being in danger, just him.

I dunno. I've been having some actual nightmares lately. There was one recently that scared me so much I woke up, sat bolt upright, and ripped the earplugs out of my ears. When I looked at the clock it said 5:43 AM. X| I don't remember what was so frightening, but maybe that's for the best. (I have to wear earplugs to sleep now unless I'm extremely exhausted... otherwise every little noise keeps me awake)


Um... in other news, I went to my first writing group meeting on Friday. It went really well, although there were only four of us. I'm really glad that's happening... while I was biking there I was thinking that I felt really great and maybe I shouldn't participate in the study after all, because I'm fine on my own.

At night, my boyfriend came over and we went to the artwalk downtown, and none of the art was that spectacular, but we listened to a band play in Anno Domini (one of the galleries) and went to a cafe. We shared an almond torte (which was lovely), and he got coffee. I asked why he likes coffee (he was drinking it straight), and he said I could try some. I took a sip, and it was really awful, honestly, even though he said it was very good. Couldn't stand the bitterness. I also got my portrait done for five dollars, and the guy... made me look kind of like a dude in the picture. Like, he gave me a really... square jawline. :S (I might post a picture of it later)

After that, we went back to my house and watched movies. Had a laugh over Thumbelina and got bored by Indiana Jones while he fell asleep. I guess at least he didn't snore during the movie. Poor guy, he's always tired because he's got so much to do. :/ Plus his commute time is awful... like half an hour... We need to find him a new place to live.

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Thursday, February 2, 2012
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Tuesday, January 31, 2012
I've realized that I collect things with the often unconscious intention of passing them onto future children. Is that weird for someone my age?

My comics... CDs... books... Physical objects are so different than digital ones. Having a library of mismatched material curiosities will always, in my mind, be superior to having a hard drive full of files, regardless of subject matter.

There's some sort of feel, a superior element of discoverability, that digital possessions will just never have for me.

I want my kids to be able to explore the things I use to characterize myself without ever having to go through a computer...

When I was younger I loved exploring my parents' things. My dad's shelves of books, my mom's jewelry boxes (and other containers of knick knacks). Just want my kids to be curious and not stare at screens from an early age. I wonder if I can do that.

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In all seriousness [DP]
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Maybe a placeholder for now
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
-Adopting an idea to postpone something; not having the beliefs usually associated with the idea
-Gaining other reasons to support the idea
-Informing everyone of the idea without the original reasons behind it
-Reaching a situation where the idea is on the brink of being abandoned; the original reason is now unimportant, but the newfound reasons are still in place...
-Feeling conflicted; disregard new reasons because of original reasoning and change in feelings/situation?
-Is going back on it now lying?
-The implications of abandoning the idea: future problems?
-Certain meanings that maybe should be avoided?
-The consequence of actions; can never be taken back once done

I don't want to be at this crossroads right now.

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