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Memores acti prudentes futuri


No shadows will replace the warmth of your contact
love is dead in Metropolis
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
―D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
―Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
―Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories― if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
―The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
― Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita
TICoSME
Musicalities!
Online Radio
Soma.fm

More Fun Shtuff
Newgrounds Audio Portal
Pandora
SoundClick
Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics

Web Comics and Such
A Distant Soil (Some nudity)
The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff)
Aquapunk
Axe Cop
Basic Instructions
Bear Nuts
Beeserker

Blue Milk Special
Bobbins
Broodhollow
Bug
Buttersafe
Camp Weedonwantcha
Chainsawsuit
ChannelATE
Cigarro & Cerveja
Conspiracy Friends!
Crunchy Bunches

Curia Regis
Cyanide and Happiness
dead winter (has some explicit stuff)
Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?)
Diesel Sweeties
Distillum
DUBBLEBABY
Dumm Comics
Eat That Toast!
Ectopiary (Some nudity)
E-merl.com
The End
Evil Diva
Evil Inc.
Existential Comics
The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon
For Lack of a Better Comic
Forming (Explicit)

Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?)
Mirror
Hark! A Vagrant
Head Doctor Productions
Hollow Mountain
IDK Comics
Inscribing Ardi
The Intrepid Girlbot
JBabb Comics
The Last Halloween
Last Train to Old Town
L.A.W.L.S.
The League of Evil Genius

Legend of Bill
Living With Insanity (some nudity)
Love Me Nice
Married to the Sea
Meaty Yogurt
Medium Large
The Meek
Metacarpolis
Monsterhood
Monsterkind
The Moon Prince
Moon Town
Moth (Some nudity)
Mr. Lovenstein
Muddlers Beat

Natalie Dee
Nedroid
The Non-Adventures of Wonderella
Optipess
Out There
Phuzzy Comics
P.I. Jane
Political Cartoonists Index
Poorly Drawn Lines
Powernap
The Property of Hate
Red Meat
Rice Boy
Robbie and Bobby
Rosscott, Inc.
Safely Endangered
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Savage Chickens
Scenes from a Multiverse
The Secret Knots
Serenity Rose
Stand Still. Stay Silent
Stinking Hellebore
Strong Female Protagonist
Subnormality
The Super Fogeys
Tales of Pylea
Three Word Phrase (some nudity)
Tiny Kitten Teeth
Toothpaste for Dinner
Trying Human (Some nudity)
Two Guys and Guy
Mirror

Witchy
xkcd
Yellow Peril (PG-13)

Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics
The Abominable Charles Christopher
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
The Adventures of Ellie Connelly
American Hell
Bag of Toast
Bear in Mind
Bobwhite
The Book of Biff
Brat-halla
Brightest
Bullfinch
Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff)
Daisy is Dead
Dream Life
Edemia
Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life
A Fine Example
Finn and Charlie are HITCHED
Floodmud
Freaks!

Green Wake
Gun Show
Hello with Cheese
Helpful Figures
Intragalactic
Kyle & Atticus
Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
Letters to a Wild Boar
Lovecraft is Missing

Manta-man
Meat and Plastic
Minimalism Sucks
Mis-
Moe
The Nerds of Paradise
Nimona
No Reason Comics
Odd-Fish
One Swoop Fell
Owen's Uncles
Patches
Pictures for Sad Children
Raymondo Person
A Redtail's Dream

Riotfish
Roy's Boys (PG 13?)
Run Freak Run
Saint's Way
Shortpacked!
Sin Titulo
Snowflakes
Split Lip
Spooky Doofus
SubCulture
Super Buzzkill
The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston
Thermohalia
Troubletown
Ugly Girl
YU + ME
2815 Monument

Pure Flash Awesomeness
Aardvardkbutter.com
Angry Alien
Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry
The Frown
Hoogerbrugge

Other
Bogleech
Clients from Hell
Brian Despain
Creatures in My Head
Damn You Auto Correct!
Jhonen Vasquez's site
Overheard in New York
Passive Aggressive Notes
Submarinechannel.com
Superdickery
UHpinions
Whirled
Looky here
free counters
I keep having semi-nightmares
Monday, February 21, 2011
Last night I dreamt I was with a group of kids - preteens in a building I used to live in. Something bad had happened in my old room, so we weren't supposed to go in there. One guy, ignoring the warnings, went in anyway, and he didn't come back.

The rest of us waited around for a little while, then decided to go look for him.

When we opened the door the room was dark and full of raw meat.

---

Yesterday I dreamt that I was employed in Hell, which looked more like a collection of old southern farm properties than flame-infested caves.

I was seeing a guy who had, for whatever reason, an unacceptable ethnicity. He was supposedly black or Indian, but he looked vaguely Spanish or Hispanic in some way. I had two sisters who were very racist, and he had two brothers who were as well. In order to evade them we had to walk in a strange dance-like pattern that, in the dream, I described as "circles". You had to take two steps forward, then one back to the right, and then one to the left, and so on. If one of the pairs of siblings caught us they would undoubtedly kill the partner whose race they hated.

---

Several days ago I had a dream that I was a little boy going to therapy. I kept having flashes where I saw my own gravestone. After the second time, the gravestone had my name as well as the name of my child and grandchild on it. I realized that I was not young at all, but in fact old or dead, and the trauma of losing my child had caused me to revert to a childlike state.

Later, I was with a friend (this time I was myself) in the backyard of the therapist's office. It looked just like my backyard with no plants. He suggested we dig in a part of the dirt, so we did, and uncovered a bottle of children's vitamins. Seeing this, he became horrified, and explained to me that the therapist had been feeding him such supplements to keep him from aging, so that he would have to go to her forever (she was a children's therapist). Following this discovery, she walked out toward us with a calm, slightly resigned face. She told us that we could never tell anybody what she had done, and advanced on my companion.

He climbed into the rusty shell of a car near the spot where we had dug, but she went in after him and grabbed his arm. I, on the outside, could only watch in horror.

She held in her free hand a stapler. "Oh, staples can't kill him," I thought to myself with a bit of relief. Then, as if to defy me, she extracted a staple about the size of a large nail and began to stab him in the back. I screamed, but stayed put, not knowing what to do. He struggled until she stabbed him in the back of the neck, then went slack, with a dazed look on his face. She stabbed him once more, and he collapsed.

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Ducks!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I saw some ducks hanging around one of the fountains at school today.


I don't know how they got there, but I thought it was cute. There was a male and a female, and they were just walking around. Later, when I exited the library (about forty five minutes after?), they were swimming in the water, just doing what ducks do.

Despite the cuteness, I was somewhat worried that the water wouldn't be healthy for them to be in. It looked like they were drinking some of it, and it probably has chemicals in it to keep anything from growing in the fountain...

Also saw a guy in class who has this adorable little peach-fuzzy goatee type thing on his face. It's like he glued a duckling to his chin. XP (He's got pretty dark hair, so it's more noticeable that his facial hair is so light)

In less fuzzy news, it would appear that another pair of my earphones broke. Bahhh. My SnuggBuds lost sound in one side pretty recently, and now my nice V-MODA ones have gone the same way. D: I still have the pair that came with my iPod way back when, but they're not as good as the ones that half-died on me.

Oh yeah, and I was reading The Scientific American Mind and there was some stuff about how gazing into the eyes of someone of the gender you're attracted to, even if they're a stranger, can greatly increase your sense of intimacy with them. (It's gotta be a mutual stare though... otherwise you just look threatening)

Makes a lot of sense, I guess. I kind of want to try it out, but I don't think there's anyone I can test it on. :P

---ADDITIONALLY!---

I realized that the mustachioed fellow in my last entry looks like a certain webcomic character... CLICKIES

And lastly, I had a... sort of a nightmare... that Alice found quite amusing. Would anybody care to read about it, or should I not bother?

---Edit---

Ehehehe

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Wind and rain...
Tuesday, February 15, 2011


I think that the Mills Brothers' version of this song is my favorite. Other singers may add "style" or "flair" to things, but when it comes down to it I really prefer... well... singing in tune with the music. Kind of why I've been so disappointed that I can't find any videos of Shirley Bassey singing "For Once in My Life" where she doesn't take extensive liberties with the tune. X| I guess once you're famous enough you don't have to pay attention to background things like that.

It's pretty windy today. My hair suffered for it. Although I really want to donate it, I'm starting to feel really bad that I haven't taken great care of it, and I'm wondering if I should just chop it off and start over. :/

People I have seen recently:
-Asian dude at the farmers market with three layered popped collars
-Guy in my psych class who randomly started looking completely shocked (he was just staring into nothingness and suddenly went wide-eyed several times)
-Red haired man on bike with a beard like John Muir's

-This dude and his majestic moustache:

I wish I could have gotten a better picture of it for you, but I think you probably get the idea at least. He was actually on the side of the cement plant that's been... polluting, I guess, but I must give him some credit for cultivating that thing. ESPECIALLY since it's completely white and his hair isn't. (Wtf?)

Yesiree, the wind is blowin' somethin' fierce out there.

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Getting lost again
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Apparently I forgot I had a body yesterday. I mean, this has happened before, since I tend to get wrapped up in my thoughts easily, but it's not usually... a big deal...

I don't think of myself as being a human, or a girl, or even a physical entity.

Not sure what I think of myself at this point. A moving presence that makes observations?

I forget I'm part of the world.

---Edit---

Found this mildly interesting, mais que pensez-vous?

CLICKIES

A bit odd to proclaim that, I think, but I suppose it is an icebreaker.

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A tumble
Friday, February 11, 2011


I think I had a dream with Muffy in it? Most of it I can't remember, but there was a part where a companion and I were sitting at a large, low round table, taking a test. The table was white and we sat in small blue plastic school chairs, the kind used for little kids. We were in a brightly lit empty warehouse with corrugated iron walls a high ceiling. Some steel barrels were stacked sideways against one of the walls, and they were high enough that one could feasibly reach the big windows near the ceiling if perched atop them.

There were a couple other tables in the room. Like ours, they were round and white, and situated on smooth blue mats. Young people all dressed in white were quietly taking their tests on them.

It was a driving test, and I didn't know what to put down. That didn't bother me, though. I just looked around with mild curiosity at my fellow test takers, then across the table at the only people in the room who weren't wearing white.

Morpheus and Neo/Muffy were sitting there, pretending to take the test. I knew that they had a plot to blow up the building and escape, and I planned to follow them so I wouldn't be stuck here.

Anyway, they set a big fire and I climbed up the barrels and jumped out the window, and who knows what happens next because I totally woke up then. OH HOW EXCITING.

---

This morning as I was biking to school I looked down and noticed a black spider hanging from a strand of silk attached to my handlebars. The wind was blowing it right at me.

I freaked out, screamed, and sort of crashed/toppled my bike in the street as I tried frantically to escape it. The fall broke part of my right pedal, but not to the extent where it's unusable or an inconvenience. I also skidded a tiny bit across the pavement, but I only scraped my fingertips, so no real damage was done. (I don't count a chipped nail as damage)

Not sure what happened to that spider, but I hope it suffered or suffers a miserable death.

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Where idle thoughts wander...
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Here I am, biking along, mildly insulated from the world around me by the music playing in my ears.

Oh hey, there's that tree that hangs over the road low enough that I have to move closer to the middle of the street so I don't get scratched up.

Ah, but I'm wearing goggles, so it can't stab at my eyes.

Hm, but what if the tree wasn't an inanimate object and grabbed me if I got too close, and pulled off my goggles and gouged out my eyes and tore up my face with its pointiest twigs?

Evil tree.

---

Yesterday I went to a city meeting about a cement plant and ended up catching a ride back to school with one of my classmates (I carpooled there, but the driver wanted to stay for the whole meeting, which could've been who knows how long). Apparently he went to Cal Poly for three and a half years, then decided he didn't like his major and left. My reaction was something along the lines of "wow, what?" Makes me feel better about my school situation though, I have to admit.

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Pleasantly un-awkward
Sunday, February 6, 2011
So... yesterday (Saturday) I met up with a guy from OKC.

Just looked at the calendar, and wow, we talked for less than two weeks before meeting up. X|

It wasn't a date, just to clarify. I made sure that we both knew it was totally platonic, and we each brought a friend.

We met up at an Ethiopian restaurant (I can NEVER get enough of their lentils!) and had to wait a ridiculously long time for service. I felt bad, since I suggested the place, but everyone told me not to worry and that it was okay. Luckily, they seemed to enjoy the food, so that made me feel a bit better.

Alice and his friend dominated the conversation a bit, but I did chip in, and it wasn't at all awkward like I was terrified it would be.

After dinner we went to Pinkberry and everyone but me got frozen yogurt, but we didn't want to sit in there, so we moved to Chipotle and grabbed one of their tables... without buying anything. :0 Yeah, I'm surprised the FBI isn't after us right now, too. I think I talked a lot more there, because the conversation sort of got split between me and the guy and Alice and his friend. Later, on AIM, he told me that he hadn't talked much there because he was sleepy from the food, but that I didn't bore him or anything, so that was reassuring...

But yeah, it went well, so we might meet up again in the future! I did end up telling my mom about it, so I'm kind of afraid she's got the wrong impression of what's going on, but that's not a big deal. This time I can pretty much guarantee that this will not culminate in dating.

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The card
Friday, February 4, 2011
Here's the card I made for my mom for her birthday:



I feel like people are more impressed with this than they should be. Mr. Peanut is not a very hard character to draw.

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