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why do I bother?
Monday. 1.31.11 4:59 pm
Every time I try to make plans for us, they get pushed back and pushed back until it's just no longer possible for the plans to happen. Even if it's as simple as trying to watch a show on Hulu. We've been pushing that back for 3 days now. And guess what? It has to be pushed back again.

Every single time we make plans, he gets called in to work. I mean, yeah, this is what he signed up for, but still. He got off work at 6 this morning, had to be back in at 2 in the afternoon {an 8 hour turnaround} and now just a call to go somewhere else after he's done with this shift. That's a turnaround into a double. When is this man going to be allowed to sleep for more than 4 hours? And when are you going to let him hang out with me for more than the 4 hours that he has to sleep.

My schedule is set. I work 6am-2pm Wednesday and 2pm-10pm Thursday through Sunday with Monday and Tuesday off. It's almost like they know I have those two days off and are purposely scheduling him so that we have no time to hang out together or sleep together for more than a few hours. Last week he was working grave shift and 5 hours after he got home I was waking up to leave for work. Then he'd be gone before I even got home.

I supposed I have to get used to sleeping alone because he's asking for a grave shift so that he can go to school. And us not being able to hang out, I have to get used to as well since with school and work, we will barely have time to see each other, let alone hang out.

I need to stop getting my hopes up about being with him. Even if it is for just a day. Apparently that's too much to ask for. It's like I'm living with a roommate that I never see. Not my fiance. Couples are supposed to sleep together at least a few times a week and go out at least a few times a month. I don't even think we've got that going. It'll be worse once school starts.

What am I supposed to do?

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goals to accomplish before 25: revisited
Sunday. 1.30.11 12:20 am
This is a list of goals that I had made a while back {May 1, 2008 to be exact} on my lesser-known alter-ego, bug, and I figured I'd revise that list and make it a current entry. The things crossed off, obviously, have been done. The ones with ** at the end are in the works and should be accomplished before October 5th of this year.

~ go back to school. **
~ buy a new car {yes, I'm talking brand new, off the lot}
~ completely redo my wardrobe {keeping a few things, of course} **
~ get a passport **
~ get at least one dog, if not more
~ celebrate my first one year anniversary with my boyfriend {and keep going to celebrate many more; I've never made it a year with someone}
~ get lasik
~ win a jackpot {in a casino or otherwise}
~ go to Hawaii
~ see a tornado, in person
~ learn how to snowboard
~ spend an entire week just relaxing on the beach {with one or more friends, of course}
~ spend an entire day just riding roller coasters {if I happen to break a world record, then so be it}
~ go to New York to visit my family
~ get at least 3 more tattoos; I won't be even close to ending there, but I want at least that many more before I turn 25
~ visit Forks, WA **
~ go see the Criss Angel Cirque Du Soleil Show

The ones that haven't been crossed off or asterisked are things that I would definitely still like to do, but it's highly unlikely that they will happen before I turn 25. I'm going to try for a tattoo, but I doubt I'll have three more before my birthday.

Anywho, I just wanted to bring this list to a current status. I happened across it a few days ago, but I didn't know how to put strikes through stuff.

I will be updating this list again in about 10 months.

Until next time NuTang ...

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aww! ... wait, what?
Monday. 1.24.11 11:45 pm
So your guy tells you he thinks you two should go visit this place instead of the original place because he thinks you'll like the new place better. At this point, you're thinking "aww! how sweet! He's thinking about me." Which is true, but only to a point.

Later on you realize there was a reason behind the change that had absolutely nothing to do with you.

Jacob had wanted to take me to Friday Harbor one night so that we could hang out, see the boats, the stars and just enjoy the time together. Then about a week or so later he suggests we go to Port Townsend instead. He says I'd like it out there better. That I'd have more fun. I've been wanting to go out there because that's where we were originally planning on living until he realized since it's a small town, there weren't really any jobs.

I find out yesterday {or earlier today; I can't remember} that he wants to buy this book and ... wait for it ... Port Townsend is the only place in the area that sells it. So it changing from Friday Harbor to Port Townsend really had nothing to do with whether I'd like one place more than the other. It had to do with the fact that the original place didn't sell the book he wanted.

I mean, it's still sweet that he does think about whether I'd like the place or not, but I thought it was slightly amusing that that wasn't the only reason he decided to switch places.

In other news ... I got my book from the library. It's called The Soloist. Yes, it's the one the movie is based off of. No, I haven't seen the movie. Though I want to. Perhaps I'll borrow the movie next. Or just get it through Netflix. Once I'm done reading the book, I'm not sure what book I'll get next. Maybe I'll just walk around and pick out whatever pops out at me.

Alright, that's about it. Until next time NuTang ...

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silly me
Saturday. 1.22.11 12:02 am
When was the last time you all had a home phone? I was 17. A good 7 years ago.

7 years is more than enough time to forget a simple step when dialing a number. Especially a long distance number.

I needed to fax something out to Vegas and I couldn't understand why the fax machine wasn't sending it. I figured maybe it was the machine, so I tried another one. Same thing. It wouldn't register. One more fax machine and I'm now frustrated. I just need to send this one piece of paper and be done with it.

Know what I was forgetting to do? Dial the 1 before the 10-digit number. Yeah, remember that? Whenever you wanted to call Grandma and Grandpa or Auntie and Uncle, you had to dial a 1 before dialing their out-of-state number.

Well, needless to say, thanks to the help of the nice nurse who explained the necessity of the 1, I was finally able to send my fax. Now I know for next time. I felt silly afterward, but it's a funny story to tell.

Anywho, is it weird that when I get a new pen I feel I must write with it? I found this pen at work; one of those marker/pens that come out like a marker, but doesn't bleed through the paper. I've been doing all my word searches with it. Instead of alternating colors like I normally do {alternating colors makes it less bland.} I want to write something with it, but I don't know what to write. Oh well. I'll figure something out. Even if it drives me nuts.

Oh, I got a library card. But only to one system. There are two out here, but the other one isn't as widespread. I've already filled out an app for the other one, I just haven't gotten around to driving out to one of the branches to pick up the card. I've got one book on hold; The Soloist. I've read the first two chapters already and like it so far. I haven't seen the movie, but I think I'd rather read the book first. Just to get a full understanding. I'm waiting on the library to e-mail me the notification that it's arrived.

Uhm, yeah, that's it for now. Till next time NuTang ...

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Friday. 1.21.11 12:52 am
It's amazing how quickly dishes can become piled up. And just how long we let them sit there before actually washing them. I usually will do the dishes on my days off. Or on nights when Jacob works grave and I have nothing better to occupy my time. Jacob ... he'll do them when I ask him to. Since he's working tomorrow night, it looks like I'll be taking care of them then.

I'm pretty bored right now. I've got at least 2 hours before I can go to bed. My hair is still too wet to sleep on. And no, before you suggest it, I will not buy a hair dryer. One, they do more damage than good and two, it still takes almost an hour to blow dry my hair. I don't know about you, but it's not the easiest task to keep your arms above your head for that long. So I've got some time to kill.

I'm still broke. Will be for a while. Oh well. I suppose I'm used to it by now.

Yeah, that's all I've got. Nothing has happened since Monday.

Til next time ...

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gotta love timing {UPDATE}
Sunday. 1.16.11 1:50 am
I went out to my car to head to work and guess what I see?

A flat tire.

So I go back inside and ask Jacob to put the spare on for me. I call my work to let them know I have a flat and that I was going to be late. I also called Jacob's work to let them know that he might be a few minutes late because he was fixing a flat tire.

I was all excited today too because I had finally gotten new windshield wipers {I kept putting off buying new ones until it got to the point where it was easier to see through the rain than the streaks the windshield wipers were causing} and it was raining today so I could put them to use.

My excitement was killed thanks to my tire. And because this happened on a Saturday, I can't get my tire fixed until Monday when Discount Tire is open again.

Oh well. Hopefully this time will be easier than the last time I had a flat tire. Last time my tire went flat while I was driving on it and I ended up having to buy an all new tire. This time the tire went flat overnight while the car was parked and the nail is in the top of the tire as opposed to the side. Either way getting a flat tire is a pain in the ass.

So in short: excitement over the fact that I can see clearly out my windshield again thanks to the awesome new wipers. And annoyance at the {now} 2nd flat tire that I've had to experience.

Until next time NuTang ...

{UPDATE} Turns out it wasn't a nail. It was a frickin snow chain link! Gotta love the necessities that come with living in a snowy place. Except they're supposed to stay on the tire! Not get stuck in mine. Either way, my tire has been fixed and I'm able to drive normally again. I can go back to being excited about my new windshield wipers.

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