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.*. Me and Erika .*.
- A.D.I.A.S. -
Only see, somehow it always seems that I'm learnin' or
something I can never be
It dosen't matter to me, 'cause I will always be that pimp I see
in all my fantasies

I don't know your fucking name.
So what? Let's fuck...

Screaming to be the only way that I can truly be free
from my fucked up real life
so I dream and stroke it harder, 'cause its so fun to see my
face staring back at me
.*. Marcy and Me .*.
.*. Me and Tara .*.
I hate you...
Tuesday. 2.15.05 3:21 pm
I hate you greg muir..... i hate you with every breath that i can take.. you dont even know what im going through because of you.. and if you wanna continue believing other people before you belive me (remember, one of your old friends) thats alright. Im telling you the truth greg i wish you would understand that. I want you and courtney to be together.. and i never said anything about you inviting me to your house and all that shit "you" told me... i never said that.. i promise on everything that i didnt say that. I hate you i hate you i hate you .... god i hate you. Fucking people in Troy is what does it.. they go around spreading rumors like its not gonna effect me. Well, it did. Emotionally it did.. you dont even know.. im so hurt by this that i dont know what to do with myself. Dont ever talk to me again, and let me live my life and ill be happy. And yes, it was nothing but a MISTAKE... and i hate you because of it... you can sit there and listen to what ppl say, beleive them, and yell at me about it when it isnt even true. YOU'RE one of those people who dont know who i really am greg.. but i know who you are. Believe me, i do. I cant belive you.. and i cant belive myself. You and i are nothing but complete fucking idiots.

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So glad auto cad just got over...
Tuesday. 2.15.05 2:03 pm
I was all dressed up today.. actually looked half decent... for nothing haha. Atleast it was a sunny day so i wasnt cold. :) . Today was a pretty good day. I got the sweetest card put in my locker..(love you) and yeah, it did make me feel better. I almost shed a tear.. lol.

Marcy wasnt to school today.. she was sick i guess. I hate it when she doesnt go to school... its not as fun and i never have anyone good to walk with in the hall way.. or nobody to pick on in English class. I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER MARCY! She was supposed to come over tonight and watch movies. I get the movie "Saw" after school today.. its my valentines day present... i get 50$ from my dad each year. Its a great movie... a little on the freaky side.. but thats the way i like it. muhahaha. So looks like im watching it all by myself cause mom doesnt like scary movies and dad wont watch a movie if mom wont.. so if your not doing anything.. come on over and we'll watch it! lol.

Well, im gonna go since there isnt much time left in class.. ttyl.

I love you!! (wink wink)

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Happy Valentines Day...!
Monday. 2.14.05 7:31 pm
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Confused/angry/upset... who wouldnt?
Sunday. 2.13.05 6:03 pm
Well.. idk. Things are crazy right now.. and im just trying to think of the best thing possible to make things right again. Im so scared about tomorrow.. i dont know what im gonna say to all those people who are gonna come up to me.. asking me shit.. i guess im just gonna have to tell them the truth...

Other than that, my mom has sergery on the 28th of february... prolly wont be in school that day. Id rather spend a day in the hospital with my mom than stay in school and put up with crap all day.

Last night was pretty cool... Marcy and I spend the night at my sisters all by ourselves to watch the dogs/house, whatever. Her two pit bulls woke me up this morning by jumping on my stomach and licking my face. Scary mean pit bulls? Hell no.. lol. We went to the movies to see Boogyman... marcy and amanda jumped everytime something scary happened... what pussies lol. Then we came home today.. spent time with family.. Marcy and i fell asleep on the couch together.. aww lol.

Well i dont know what else to write about.. talk to you all tomorrow... damn, tomorrow. Kill me please lol. I think ill be fine.

CrH i love yah!

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Guess not..
Friday. 2.11.05 8:21 pm
I knew it was a mistake.. and i guess now im paying for it. Looks like i HAVE to break up with Zack... better me tell him than him find out on his own on Monday when its going all over school.. I wanted to end it.. but not like this. This isnt the person I am... and its not who i wanna be. So, heres my apologie. Courtney, Greg, and Zack... im so sorry for hurting you like i did. You guys probably hate me, and i know its what i deserve. I hate myself for this and if i could take it all away.. I'd do it in a heartbeat. None of it meant nothing.. absolutly nothing.. and why i did it, i honestly dont know. You have every reason in the world to hate me ... maybe someday you'll realize the true person i am.

And thanks Craig for everything. Like my info says/or did say... you sure are somethin'. You mean so much to me.. not everyone can take the time to understand me like you did tonight. All of you... Dennis,Ed, and espically you and Courtney S. I was hurting so bad.. but you all tend to put a smile right back on my face... i dont kno what id do without ya'll... and i love you craig.. so freaking much! Thanks again.

Mondays is gonna be hell...

would of been 3 years today for mike and i .... bet hes thinking bout me there in his jail cell .

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Today was much better...
Friday. 2.11.05 1:46 pm
LUNCH! OMG so freaking funny. Marcy and i had me laughing so hard when me and her we're talking about some guy and marcy said " I wanna hump you. I wanna hump you til the sun goes down. Then hump more til it comes up again!" haha something like that.. in the funniest voice imaginable. Then Marty decides to walk over.. and he grabbed ahold of my cookie and crumbled it all up.. and when i stood up to take it away from him saying.."Marty im gonna fuckin..." and right at that time, my elbow smashes amanda right in the eye! lol we were all laughing so hard.. even amanda.. half in pain.. lol. But i was finally able to talk.. and i told her i was sorry... what a time..

Nothing else really happened today... but me and heather still arent talking. She really has some issues... lunch was so much better without her sitting there today. I sit where she sits now.. perfect angle.

- thats marcy smacking me across the face like she always does. lol

Well... godda go! CYA

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Sexy huh?
*Me and Shauntel*
-Everybody Hurts-

When the day is long and the night
The night is yours alone,
When you’re sure you’ve had enough of this life
Well hang on
Don’t let yourself go, everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes.
*Erika Amy and Me*
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