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Memores acti prudentes futuri

You're unsure if I am a loose end or a strand
that waits for you to mend or understand
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
~ Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
~ William Blake
Online Radio

More Fun Shtuff
Newgrounds Audio Portal
Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics

Web Comics and Such
A Distant Soil (Some nudity)
The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff)
Axe Cop
Basic Instructions
Bear Nuts

Blue Milk Special
Cigarro & Cerveja
Crunchy Bunches

Curia Regis
Cyanide and Happiness
dead winter (has some explicit stuff)
Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?)
Diesel Sweeties
Eat That Toast!
The End
Evil Diva
Evil Inc.
Existential Comics
The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon
For Lack of a Better Comic
Forming (Explicit)

Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?)
The Last Halloween
Last Train to Old Town
The League of Evil Genius

Legend of Bill
Living With Insanity (some nudity)
Love Me Nice
Married to the Sea
Meaty Yogurt
Medium Large
The Meek
The Moon Prince
Moth (Some nudity)
Mr. Lovenstein
Muddlers Beat

Natalie Dee
The Non-Adventures of Wonderella
Out There
Owen's Uncles
Phuzzy Comics
Political Cartoonists Index
Poorly Drawn Lines
The Property of Hate
Red Meat
Rice Boy
Robbie and Bobby
Rosscott, Inc.
Safely Endangered
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Savage Chickens
Scary Go Round
Scenes from a Multiverse
The Secret Knots
Serenity Rose
Stand Still. Stay Silent
Stinking Hellebore
Strong Female Protagonist
Tales of Pylea
Three Word Phrase (some nudity)
Tiny Kitten Teeth
Toothpaste for Dinner
Trying Human (Some nudity)
Two Guys and Guy

Wilde Life
Yellow Peril (PG-13)

Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics
The Abominable Charles Christopher
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
The Adventures of Ellie Connelly
American Hell
Bag of Toast
Bear in Mind
The Book of Biff
Camp Weedonwantcha
Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff)
Conspiracy Friends!
Daisy is Dead
Dream Life
Dumm Comics
Ectopiary (Some nudity)
Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life
A Fine Example
Finn and Charlie are HITCHED

Green Wake
Gun Show
Hark! A Vagrant
Head Doctor Productions
Hello with Cheese
Helpful Figures
Hollow Mountain
IDK Comics
Inscribing Ardi
The Intrepid Girlbot
JBabb Comics
Kyle & Atticus
Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
Letters to a Wild Boar
Lovecraft is Missing

Meat and Plastic
Minimalism Sucks
Moon Town
The Nerds of Paradise
No Reason Comics
One Swoop Fell
Pictures for Sad Children
Raymondo Person
A Redtail's Dream
Roy's Boys (PG 13?)
Run Freak Run
Saint's Way
Sin Titulo
Split Lip
Spooky Doofus
Super Buzzkill
The Super Fogeys
The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston
Ugly Girl
2815 Monument

Pure Flash Awesomeness
Angry Alien
Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry
The Frown

Clients from Hell
Brian Despain
Creatures in My Head
Damn You Auto Correct!
Jhonen Vasquez's site
Overheard in New York
Passive Aggressive Notes
It's Friday!
Friday, August 15, 2014


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Tuesday, August 12, 2014
I'm bingeing on "But Not Tonight" by Depeche Mode again.

That last column is how many plays each song has...

I think the last time I did this I listened to it sixty times in a row or something.

Becka's bridal shower was today and for part of it we wrote down words of wisdom/sentimental thoughts to collect in a scrapbook for her. We read them aloud to her at the end of the shower and I felt... pretty emotional reading mine. She is one of the most genuinely sweet and caring people I've ever met and it means a lot to me that we're friends and that she invited me to her wedding.

That feeling of strong emotion has lasted a long time... It's similar to the feeling I get from listening to this song. A strong sense of something welling up inside me and wanting to get out. Tears are part of it but not all. It's overwhelming to be able to feel so grateful. To not feel numb and hazy.

Once I was blind but now I see...

I am tired and I should sleep but I also kind of just want to cry about life in a good way. And in a little bit of a sad way I guess. In a way I want to cry for myself before, before I could really feel. I want to cry for everything I never knew I was missing. There's so much to life and sometimes I just can't see it. In these moments when I feel truly aware that I am alive and capable of perceiving so many things it's overwhelming and I just get indescribably emotional. My life isn't perfect but it's still like being free when I was in jail for so long. Or it feels that way when I get like this.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2014
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Okay, super delayed I guess, but pictures! [3P]
Monday, August 11, 2014
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Friday, August 8, 2014
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Something tugging
Wednesday, August 6, 2014

This song feels like a pulling, a longing, a grasp too short to reach.

And I guess that makes sense, since it's about falling in love with a shooting star.

Sometimes in my dreams the sky feels so close, like it's just painted onto the inside of a dome containing everything. And the treetops, as infinitely high as they look, are never more than an arm's length away if I try to pull them down. It's all enclosed and limited. There's a sense that borders are around, even if I can't see them. I wonder if other people's dreams are like that?

I'm very curious about what it's like to live as other people... It's not that I want to be someone else or hate my life, I just want to know what it feels like to be another person. To know if the sensations are comparable, if colors look the same. I keep feeling like maybe I would find a world totally alien to my experience and realize that we use the same words to describe things that aren't really the same at all, but that's probably not likely.


Listening to the song again. It still feels like a pull, but in a slightly different way. It feels like being on a merry go round and spinning around, trying to hold on but being pulled to the edge. Disorienting and difficult, straining to maintain a grip on the bars while the surroundings blur into colored lines.

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Home for awhile
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Just played Nekra Psaria, a visually interesting point and click game...

So, as the title says, I'm home now. Lots of unpacking to do, as well as some other things. I need to find a book to return to Amazon and return a sweater to Hautelook because they sent me the wrong one... Now I'm looking at reviews for the site and it seems like there are a lot of issues with them. I'm really disappointed. They don't do exchanges and it seems like people have had issues with returning stuff. Soooo... not looking forward to dealing with that. All I wanted was a cute sweater. :( Sadly I got an ugly sweater instead. It's this gross nude color with thin white stripes, totally not what I ordered. Bleh.

In better news (I guess?) I tried this new shampoo and conditioner (the kukui one by Organix) and they made my hair feel awesome. It's so soft and smooth... I left the bottles in Washington though, so I'll have to get more here...

I have lots of pictures to post and stuff to talk about I guess, but it's like 3 AM here so I think I should probably do that later.

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Last day here :T [3P]
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
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