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Sunday, May 14, 2006
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS OUT THERE ESPECIALLY TO MY WONDERFUL MUM WHO IS FILLED WITH NEVER-ENDING LOVE FOR MY BROTHER, MY DAD N I. i love you mummy!!!! i miss my mum... i miss her sound advice, her cookin, her hugs, n everything else she does for me.

oh well... back to reality... the 1st n 2nd week of june is goin to be a rather busy time for me.

1/6 - 2 hr practical exam for stats from 3 - 5pm... (4 questions... hope it'll b fine... *prays*)
7/6 - poster presentation at launceston general hospital (better get started on it)
9/6 - MLP3 exam (study time!!! crunch time.)
14/6 - stats theory exam from 1 - 4pm (4.30 the latest).... (hope it'll b easy *prays*)

oooh n MLP3 powerpoint presentation is either on 5/6, 6/7, 8/6 or possible 9/6... got to think of speech. should b alright. :) might write the speech after lunch today. dun think it'll take me tt long. writing it now give me time to improve on it... till steve release the schedule for presentation. i'm edgin closer n closer to graduatin... on the final leg... i so can't wait! coz it also means tt i m edging closer n closer to goin back home for good. yay! concentrate on honours though... my first class honours is on the line. my goal: FIRST CLASS HONOUrS! will pave the way for me. better chance of gettin scholarships to further my studies when i do decide to. gambatte marissa! :)

hopefully literature review can be put aside by the end of this week. i'm gettin there. writin up the last part... which is always the most difficult. the aims n ginving insight to part of the experiment. i'm excited. coz it finally means i can start using the machines. yet another baby step closer. woo hoo!!

this is all goin to b worth it at the end. so work hard now. suffer now. but enjoy the sweetness of succes. hm yupz. i better do tt. cut down on watch shows/movies... zzz....hehe... but there is ghost whisperer, CSI, CSI: Miami, and X2 tonight! muhahaha.... :P

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Saturday, May 13, 2006
timetable is out! can't complain much... since i only have 2 exams. one is co-ordinated by the uni and the other is run by the school only. the one run by the school is durin the friday of study week (9th june) and the other is duin the first week of the exam period (14th june) i have no excuse not to do well this semester. 2 papers only. time to get down to some serious studyin. i have just about 1 month before exams start. plus i have 1 presentation to do at school and another to do at the hospital. i better start the one for the hospital. discuss it with simon on monday n start. if not i might not have time to complete... time is the essence for me now. i have to set my timetable, plannin my time for studyin n project work. i can't wait for graduation!

told mum not to come up in june. i can cope. i'll b fine. it's either i m goin to melbourne or i m goin back for a short while after exams. got to ask simon when he is goin to NZ and how long he is goin for and see if it is feasible or not. but what if i go back in june.... then i can't go back in dec?? hm... have to talk to dad abt tit first. i would b a very happy girl to go back both times... din manage to talk to dad last night. so i'll talk to him later... dunno if he will allow... *ponders*

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philosophical maybe?
Sunday, May 7, 2006
just realised... sometimes no matter how hard you try.. things just doesn't turn out the way u want it to. with studies, people around u n life in general. hm... studies... let's see... i wanted to b a doctor. but i'm not in med school... i m in biomed school. n i do enjoy wat i m doin... so i shouldn't complain. but i think deep down in my heart i still want to be a doctor. contemplatin if i should do post grad med school... or PhD instead.

to think abt it... out of the past 5 years... this is the year i have prob cried the most. n it is not even 1/2 down. it's just the words n actions of people ard you whom you love... tt cut deep into ur heart. leavin big gaping wounds. bk said something in chinese i found very true n meaningful that when translated it means:

"a person who has been hurt countless time will lock their heart away to protect themselves. only when the right person comes along will they have the key to open ur heart and pick up the broken pieces and fix it"

and that person would b the love of your life. the person whom you will marry at the drop of the hat. the person u wanna spend the rest of your life with. this person will open your eyes n heart to feelins you would have never experienced before.

i've been hurt too many times by the people i love n when i think back on it, the tears just roll. i dun want to cry anymore. i tell myself tt many times. but the tears just roll no matter how hard i try. but yet the people i love make me laugh too. wat a contradiction.

i guess life is meant to be the way it is. tears n laughter are the essence of life. the first thing u will experience the moment u come into this world. sometimes i wish i could go back to being an infant. u din have to worry about anything, u just ate, sleep, crapped, laughed, cry, n look cute. i love kids. their cherished innocence, their perspective of life. the way they help you look at things in way you as an adult would never have thought of lookin. it is amazing the way children make adults seem silly at times. but then again... when i was a child.. i wanted to grow up, go to pri n sec school, jc/poly n uni. so there... contradictions again.

at different stages of life, you look forward to different things. for me now... i look forward to graduating n completing honours after tt. then either work of continue on with further studies. settling down n havin kids is definitely on the list..

been feelin crappy or maybe philosophical this weekend for some unknown reason. i think mayb it coz i miss home too much. i feel like givin up on honours for a split second sometimes. but i know i shouldn't . this is a stepping stone in life, an opportunity that i have been presented with. n i m not about to let it go just because of a split second decision. i know my family will b there no matter whatever happens. supporting me every single step of the way, lovin me for who i m. thanks mum, dad n mel. u 3 mean the world to me n no one will ever take the place tt you have in my heart.

i just realised tt this entry n the previous entry is very sentimental. *ponders* i better stop... b4 it gets too much even for myself...

adios! sayonara!

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loomin exams
Saturday, May 6, 2006
just got up n i m too lazy to do my work. hopefully i'll finish my literature review by next week *prays* . might start after lunch... which to think abt... i'm gettin hungry... prob will get something to eat in an hour or so. oh well... i wanna eat nice hawker food at home... the thought of it is yummmm..... mum has to remind me when they eat something nice on the weekends... *sobsob* i hope time passes really fast so tt i can go home. spend time with the people i miss so much. no matter how fast time passes... i prob can only go back in dec... *sobsob* it's too far away.

but on 2nd thoughts... it might come pretty fast. coz been busy with honours, studyin, teachin n now this poster presentation for the hospital. i'll cope, it'll will b fine :) i've coped with the hectic curriculum of 3rd year which was in my opinion UNBELIEVABLE. imagine havin all your practical session being put in 1 week, the last week of semester to boot. LAST WEEK!! i mean the last week of semester is the time when u really mug n mug n mug ur life away coz usually we have very little classes then. but nope in first sem we had pracs the whole week form 9 - 5. plus presentaions for the major project of tt unit durin lunch. i wonder how i got thru tt semester, i couldn't study when i got back everyday. i was totally shagged out n it was my WORST semester ever... not tt all had gone as well as expected *frowns* 2nd sem was a little better thank god :)

i put the same amt of effort into each semester or mayb even more. but it seems the grades dun reflect it. mayb coz i've been too drained with all these studyin. i have to admit being a biomedic, u literally have no life. all the easter breaks n mid semester breaks are all spent rushin assignments and catchin up on study. the only time i really put things away n take a good break is durin summer. but look like there is not summer for me this year....*sobsob* i prob will only get a life when i finish honours in february. i think i have deicded to finish my last module of honours as a summer course. even though i dun have a summer... it means i finish earlier in feb. instead of comin BACK to this place in feb n finishin in august. not very conducive for me with the current state i m in. my good frens would all have completed. noora wun b here n she's my life-cum-sanity saver, i dunno wat would i do if i din have such a fren like her. if lijun was here... ooooohhh... it would b even better. haiz... oh well.. at least she is enjoyin herself in melb :)

this is the FINAL semester. n i m goin to graduate in august. oh man... it seems just like yesterday tt i was comin to tasmania to go my foundation (i.e.bridgin) course here at the uni. got into biomed. met a couple of total BITCHES along the way n definitely some good frens (noora, lj, bernard, bk) too. n *POOF* here i m, in my final semester. when i first started, i nv thought i would do honours. but here i m.. doin honours (though not formally enrolled yet).

exam timetable is comin out on fri *shudders* 2 exams n i will be done with exams for the time being (wun b the case if i decide to masters or PhD). i can't wait! seen my bro n frens graduate 4 me... n now it's finally my turn. i think i have done my parents proud. i know i have done myself proud. :) the time n effort n support that my parents have given unconditionally has been amazin n to which i m really grateful for. i love them so much.

to think of it.. my project kinda freaked me out when i first saw it. coz it involved methods tt i used in 2nd yr for a group project. which scared the hell out of me literally coz i had to do it ALL ON MY OWN. coz the 2 idiots were busy workin to get money to staisfy their cravin for buyin way too much... n here i was freakin out.... n they din even care! even on the mornin of the due date. they were sleepin. i was tryin to get them up in the mornin to help me but to no avail. in the end... i had to do it on my own... but put their names there! how shit can tt get... n obviously din do well for it at all... i think we got 60% or less. simon din know about it... till friday. only frens knew abt it coz i din want those two to sound bad no matter how much i dislike them. but now tt i m doin it on my own with simon providin a lot of help along the way... i've gotten more relaxed with it n i'll continue to try get better at it. so honours will b fine i think. simon's been really supportive n helpful. thank god for tt :)

oh well... i m seriously hungry (i eat way too much when the weather gets cold, get hungry to easily... n this is bad).... i m goin to eat... eat... i dunno wat also. can't decide. heee...

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a long time....
Thursday, May 4, 2006
hm... realised i haven't updated whoever might come read this blog. so well. here i m! weather i declare has gone insane. like i have. it's been kinda cold manz... icy actually. i swear tt the weather just decided to jump past autumn n right into winter after nice warm weather. until... i seriously need a coffee boost in the mornin. all due to the fact tt i dun wanna get up coz it's way too nice to snuggle under the nice warm blanket with the heater on, temperature just abt right for sleepin. makes me wanna hop into bed like now too... but... can't!

been busy with the literature review as usual. tryin to finish it so i can start my experimental stuff. so have to quick quick chop chop. another bomshell (kinda) today. simon decided tt he n i should do this abstract n poster thing for the health and medical research week (2 - 9th june) at the Launceston General Hospital n Clifford Craig Medical Research Trust. bombshell dropped at approximately 10.45am this mornin. the abstract is due TOMORROW. yes tomorrow. so here i m doin it now. almost done i think. have to get it done tonight n send it to simon. so tt he can read it b4 i meet him at 10. to make sure it is all right. oh well... can't say no. good for experience anyway. so yeah.

the last assignment for MLP3 is due next fri.. exam timetable is also comin out then... sheesh.... haiz... i wanna go home... but... looks like time isn't on my side. i m so so sorry baby. *sobosb* i try to go back durin christmas ok? no one will work here so should not b a prob i hope. *prays hard* unless u can come n see me graduate (although i know it's highly unlikely). u know i miss u terribly. so smile ok. n dun go wanderin... if not... u will... hm.... i'll think abt it then tell u. hehe... but i trust tt u wun ok. :)

anyhow... i better get back to this. if not i dun need to sleep already.

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Friday, April 21, 2006
1) One Tree Hill DVD box set - Season 1,2,3 (season 3 not out yet... but when it does) - desperately want them :'( (can someone fufil this for me please?!?!?! asked dad if he can get it for me... prayin hard he will fufil my wish.)
2) Go home see family, baby n frens.
3) The O.C DVD box set- Season 2 n 3 - goin to burn instead. wanna spend the money on one tree hill instead. halim will get his parents to bring OC season 2 down in dec when they come for his grad for me to burn. thanks halim! season 3 i burn it on my own.
4) When i get home after i finish honours- TV, DVD player n SCV box set in my room. (wonder if dad allows. mayb. have to sit down n talk to him abt it. mayb tmr when he calls. but we r goin to get an other tv in the house anyway. goin to bring home the tv from here. the DVD player also. so just need the SCV box. NOT GOIN TO LET MY BROTHER HAVE IT!!! NO NO NO... dun care what he says. he can get angry with me all he wants... not tt he hasn't been angry abt everything already.
i dun get it, neither will he. hmphz... totally pissed with him. how much more insensitive can he get?!?!?! aghz....)

i m totally obsessed with OC n one tree hill. chad michael murray n james lafferty in one tree hill r SIZZLIN HOT manz... i so want the box sets!!!!! have to save money money!!!!!!!! januttha... u got me addicted on one tree hill la... see what u've done!! but thanks though. HAHAHAHA!!! i need the entertainment. hiak hiak hiak :P

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