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Snack Machine
Monday. 10.15.18 4:59 pm
There's this girl I really like. I'm gonna ask her out this Saturday. So that's exciting.

IBM has treated me very well. They gave me a lot of training and I've gotten tons of help finding new projects to work on. I've barely spent any time between projects. And I've gotten to travel a little bit too! Chile last year for two weeks, and a few days for training in Chicago and New Jersey each. Certainly not vacations, but traveling is kind of fun. Especially when it's paid for! In Santiago I was introduced to pisco, which is sort of a delicate brandy. And I got to touch the Pacific Ocean for the first time.

Actually, I've done a fair amount of traveling outside of work too. I've visited a few cities in Texas for church conferences and the like. I went to a family reunion in Puerto Rico which was wonderful. Hadn't been there in a few years. Hiking in Utah for a week was challenging, incredible, and beautiful.

I had a friend get married in South Africa and I was a groomsman, so obviously I went and made a vacation out of it. Got to hang out with my closest friends all together! We drove through some parks, saw all sorts of cool plants and animals, and even got to play with a few tiger cubs. At one point I had to get out of the car in the middle of the park, with lions stalking about, and help push us out of the mud. That was...a moment.

Later we all had a "bachelor party" at Soweto Towers, where we played paintball and did their freaky 40 meter free fall. That's almost 3 seconds of falling. That's too long. It was so much fun.

Back at home, I recently moved to a new apartment. It was kind of a hairy transition, with roommates entering and leaving the group and a last minute apartment switch, but I settled into a place with a big bedroom and pretty cheap rent. I don't have any furniture except my hammock, so I've had to buy some things and scrounge for others. Slowly pulling together a living room. The hammock is my bed (again, at long last!)

I've got a lot of "adulting" to catch up on. Need new contact lenses and glasses. Gotta make a doctor appointment to get a basic checkup. Probably need a cap on a tooth. It's so easy to procrastinate when nothing is pressing.

Lacroix is more palatable when you stop thinking of it as "soda" and remember that it's just sparking water with a bit of scent added. Most Americans aren't really into sparkling water, though, so I see why there's a misconception. The lawsuit against them is just dumb.

She really likes Lacroix so I figured I'd give it a solid try.

I just finished the Hyperion Cantos, which is a series of four books by Dan Simmons. I read the first book around 2008, I think (sometime in high school I'm pretty sure), but never got around to the rest of the series until last year. I learned that lots of local libraries partner with Overdrive to offer free ebook rentals, which can be synced to my Kindle. So basically the value of my Kindle increased drastically. I finally got to read the whole Cantos, which was very good sci-fi along with Stephen King's It and a few others. I wish I had bought a kindle earlier, they're great. I'm re-reading the Inheritance Cycle now (aka The Eragon books) and even though I know the story has some moments that are a bit tedious later, the first book is really a treat. I felt like a kid again, reading it late into the night and dreaming about dragons. Great stuff.

Speaking of technology, I've gotten back into gaming with the release of Nintendo's Switch console. Zelda and Mario were both spectacular, and even though I've beaten and moved on to new games I actually played a lot of Zelda this last week. That's a good game. My Nintendo fanboy-ism has been turned up to eleven. I can't wait for Smash Bros to release in December.

I have a group of friends here in town who meet once a month to play games together. A few Switch games have local wireless capabilities, which means that we can basically have a LAN party with a bunch of consoles and TVs and stuff. We just go nuts with Mario Kart and Splatoon, mostly, but soon Mario Party will make a debut and then obviously we will play Smash a lot when it comes out.

If I can get her into Smash bros that will be a plus but I'm not worried about it. She's a great friend to me and we have other common interests. Scary movies, anime, hiking, being sassy, God, dogs, etc. She's a nurse and she's funny and smart and pretty. She challenges me. I hope I can challenge her too but I really just like making her laugh.

So that's exciting!

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Friday. 5.26.17 10:03 am
In college I had a joke with some of my friends about how streetlights seemed to turn off when I passed by, slightly more often than you would expect. When it happened, we would all burst out laughing. It was an obvious example of heuristics gone wrong, but it was still amusing. Even last week, walking my friend's dog halfway across the country in my new home city, I still texted them when two lights on the same street went out as I passed.

It's kind of reassuring that those jokes won't go away. Kind of like this community. The website is quiet, for the most part, but it's neat to be able to come back and poke around.

I got a job. I moved (again?). I'm making friends. I miss you guys though.

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Friday. 12.11.15 11:09 am
This is less dramatic/emotional and more story-telling.

I was considering the pros and cons of approaching homegirl and letting her know that I didn't feel great about the way she's been acting since the breakup. I'm not going to get into it anymore here because it isn't that important. Anyway, I was planning on maybe talking to her this weekend or even next week, but at our service on Wednesday she actually approached me and asked if we could talk afterwards. I was caught off guard, after ~3 months of silence.

It was a pretty minor conversation. She'd found out that I'd been hearing she wasn't interested in being friends, and she was pretty upset about it and decided to set the record straight herself. It's sort of a moot point now, since she just announced that she's moving to another state in a few weeks. But I still appreciate the thought. I took the chance to let her know that I wasn't feeling very well-considered, blah blah blah.

At one point she looked absolutely miserable, and the following occurred.

"You don't have to look so sad."

"Well I'm sorry, it just makes me sad that you're sad!"

I paused. I was not trying to garner pity or anything similar from her, and I certainly didn't want her to get the impression that I'm falling apart or anything, though of course I'm not exactly peachy either. The problem is she's extremely empathetic and emotional, whereas I'm so over-logical sometimes that I barely register my own emotions, much less those of the people around me. I tried briefly to explain that being sad isn't the worst thing in the world, that life is actually going pretty well for me, etc. None of it really sounded convincing and I didn't want to keep pursuing that line of thought, so I finished lamely, "Besides, I'm not really that sad."

Uh oh.

"Wait, I mean, at least not right now."

wait wait wait

"...you know, I'm just going to let that one go."

Thankfully she laughed a bit, but MAN that could have been a doozy.

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Wednesday. 12.2.15 1:16 pm
As always, I find that it's most difficult to begin. Once I make myself log in, it's almost easy!

news. news.

So, to reiterate, I got dumped. That's been a journey. I like to think I'm dealing with things much better than the last few times I've been dumped (or rejected!) but honestly, who's to say? The most recent news on that front is that I just learned that homegirl is NOT interested in picking up a friendship. Sure, maybe some time in the future (after I move away lolol) but apparently not now. This befuddles me because:

!) We have literally dozens of dearly loved friends in common and we see each other roughly every weekend. At church. You know, unity in the body and all that.
!) You said (when you dumped me) you valued our friendship and that you wanted to be friends.
!) You told my friends (about two months ago) you were sad that we couldn't talk, that you would like to be friends again soon, etc.
!) Your friends have been telling me (this whole time) that the best way to consider you would be to make efforts to bridge the gap so we can be friends. (Now they maintain the opposite.) Such discrepancy. Wow.

I am dumbfounded. I am found dumb.

So obviously that's confusing, more than is apparent here, and hurtful. See how I switched to the second person up there? Yikes!

I'm planning a second tattoo. I have this really cool idea that combines math (golden ratio mostly, also with lots of circles and fractals!) and spirituality (I actually got the idea from reading John 17 where Jesus prays for unity between the disciples.) Basically it's about how everything is connected and the universe is founded upon the concept of relationships.

Since the concept is strongly mathematical, it's impossible for me to explore ideas by hand. So, I wrote a tiny bit of software in order to generate an image based on my idea. If that isn't geeky then I do not know what is. It looks something like this:

It needs a lot of work before it becomes anything resembling art, especially TATTOO art. But it's a good start.

Now the only problem is finding an artist with the right style to pull it off. I discovered David Hale yesterday and almost peed my pants in excitement because this man's stuff is gorgeous. But today I discovered that he doesn't accept appointments from new clients anymore. Sort of. He sends on about a dozen original designs once a month in a newsletter, and people have to pick from those. One customer per design. That disappointed me greatly because the dude is less than an hour away from me!

I'm thinking of exploring my thoughts on forgiveness here. Let me get back to you.

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