Which Cowboy Bebop character are you?

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One rainy night, a guy is driving his car out in the middle of nowhere. All of the sudden the car breaks down. Pissed, the man gets out and starts walking. Surprised he walks up on a huge mansion. After he knocks on the door, an old chinese man (who somewhat resembles Mr. Myagi from The Karate Kid) answers the door. The motorist tells his story and begs the old man for lodging for the night. The old man says that he can stay, on one condition: That he doesn't touch his 20 year old daughter. The motorist thinks to himself for a moment and quickly agrees.

Later at dinner.....
While dining the motorist can't take his eyes off of the gorgeous woman sitting across from him. Then, to his surprise, he feels the woman's foot slowly caressing his leg. He struggles to keep a straight face, but she moves higher and higher. Inevitably, she ends up fondling his balls with her foot. After the old chinese man gets up to place his dishes in the kitchen, the young woman tells the motorist, "Come to my room tonight and I will fuck your brains out." The motorist remembers the old man's stipulations, but disregards them due to the wild sex that awaits. So after everyone goes to bed, the motorist goes to the woman's room as requested, and they fuck several times. He returns to his room and thinks to himself, "Phew, that was the best sex ever!"
The next morning........
The motorist wakes up to the sight of a huge boulder on his chest. The boulder has a note on it. The note reads:
I know you slept with my daughter. Since you disgraced my home and family, you have to complete a torture test.
CHINESE TORTURE TEST #1
Lift this boulder, and throw it out the window.

The motorist gets up, and even though he struggles, throws the huge rock out the window. On the windowsill there's another note. This one reads:
CHINESE TORTURE TEST #2
The rock is tied to your right testicle.
Distraught, the motorist jumps out the window to try and escape the pain of having his nut ripped off. As he is falling, he notices a note attached to the rope that's tied to his ball. THIS one reads:
CHINESE TORTURE TEST #3
Your left testicle is tied to the windowsill.

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1) never ever ever pass out at a party if you dont want to spend the next three days washing off the sharpie.
2) the 12 pack beer boxes make good tops and skirts for the fashionable girl
3) everyone has their entire room covered in something at some time as a practical joke; be it post it notes, aluminum foil, leaves, shaving cream, or even fire extinguisher spray...
4) if shes willing, why not show off your girlfriends great boobs?
5) webcams can fit in small places
6) when it snows, its a given to see at least three individual pieces of snow genitalia on your way from one place to another
7) parties are no fun without nudity
8) objects that are made for educational purposes often find themselves propping up more practical things
9) t shirts with profanity are all the rage
10) street signs can say anything when you know your way around photoshop
11) fire isn't dangerous...its entertainment. especially when you add really flammable stuff to it.
12) bulletin boards dont only advertise tutors and room vacancies.
13) beer is up there with oxygen, sleep and sex.
14) class is optional. especially when you get to blow something up.
15) 69, oh thats that number right before 70 right?
16) say penis and everyone laughs. especially when theyve had too much to drink. what am i saying, everyones had way too much to drink.
17) so a priest and a rabbi can make just about anything sound really really dumb. until you're really really high.
18) every girl you have sex with is one you dont tell your friends about. cuz then you might find out ow many of them have had her already.
19) always have a camera.
20) scanners can show just about anything. even boobs and weed. even together.
21) anything with a tube can be a bong. even nintendo controllers.
22) puke is bad but you still click on the link that says "warning: really gross"
23) anything to kill time is better than class. even mind rotting games like dope farmer.
24) warning people to 1000% is cool, but leaving your screen name up for thousands to see and having your away messages completely spammed by crowds of people showing their admiration is way cooler.
25) if you dont have a video camera, buy one as soon as possible. some things are just a lot funnier in motion.
26) your hand looks better without the ring finger, honest.
27) stealing stuff isnt wrong, its thrifty. its even easier when the university police are afraid of you.
28) rearranging the letters in signs is so much fun that you have to get a picture.
29) POSTED: NO TRESPASSING> they dont really mean it, do they? nah.
30) bush really does look like that chimp. that one too.
31) its worth the bites and scratches to make animals look like they're smoking. honest.
32) women dont buy thongs unless they want them to be seen. all that about them being to decrease panty lines? thats like telling me those long vibrating things in the cheap discount magazines are actually for your neck and shoulders. give me a break.
33) if a girl leaves any item of lingerie at your place, it becomes sole property of YOU.
34) watch south park for the answers to all of your questions.
35) you should be an artist, with all the murals you make form your beer bottle caps, your beer bottle labels, your beer boxes, your beer thats gone through your system that eventually writes your name in the snow...
36) couches and beds? FUTON, man. FUTON. its like the peanut butter and the jelly in the same jar, except it probably doesnt taste as bad.
37) God bless the internet.
38) Theres bad hangovers, then theres BAD HANGOVERS. you know the kind where you dont wake up until next week. or at all.. yea those are the bad kind.
39) Jello in the toilet. Why didnt i think of that?
40) dont do something stupid on camera because someone will make a dumb mastercard mocking add and whatever you do will be priceless.
41) theres never a limit to te ways you can insult a terrorist.
42) having a penis drawn on your face isnt so bad. its bad when you dont know you have a penis drawn on your face.
43) people arent being creative enough with duct tape. tying people up in their beds is only so funny.
44) you black out peoples eyes like anyone who knows them couldnt figure it out; and that anyone who doesnt know them would care.
45) girls kissing each other will never, i repeat, never grow old. its a thing of beauty.
46) porn makes good wallpaper until your parents come to visit.
47) Homer Simpson is much smarter than any profesor.
48) You know that had to hurt.
49) that sound? must be your roommate doin it when you havent had any in a few weeks. oh well, might as well go out and get drunk. at least you dont have to listen to your roommate havin fun.
50) Why do today what you can put off till tomorrow? or the next day? ok seriously, we know you arent gonna do it so dont waste your time wondering if you should. just hit the "fuck it" button and move on.

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comment to tell me if u like my page

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Hell yeah
Check it check it check, check check
Yo, when it come to sex advice, I'm the one to call
if you a virgin with blue balls or you tear down walls
Not Dr. Ruth, call me Dr. Knockboot
Pimped out hats, rock fashionable suits
A class for the youth, Sex Ed for your head
The do's and don'ts, that should happen in the bed
First, DON'T: run up in her raw cause you get burned
for sure, fuckin with the typical whore, because
DO: rock a Rough Ryder, whenever you inside her
Your local bodega is your supplier
And DON'T: take the pussy, if she fightin
Cause you saw what happened to Tupac and Mike Tyson
'Specially if you large, some hoes is trife
Get you on a rape charge, have you servin your life
Yo, DO: get a yes confirmation before penetration
You wind up in a police station
DON'T: get with no young bitch and hit it
She PG-13, you rated R, she not permitted
DO: check for ID, whenever chillin V.I.P.
with fly shorty P.Y.T.
Yo, DON'T: lie about the cars you got
or who you hang with, frontin when you borrowed your watch
Yo, DO: play your game right, if the G's tight
then you can fuck shorty the same night
Yo, DON'T: trick when you don't have to
You think you ballin? You turn your back they laffin at you
You don't gotta keep repeatin you a thug, she heard you
In fact, she attracted to your man that herbed you
DO: spend a lil' dough, only if you know
the bitch gross a lil' somethin too bro
DON'T: eat the pussy the first night
Maker her bless you, we call that shit gesundheit
DO: set the mood right, Bailey's with ice
A cup of Thug Passion'll make everything right
Yo, DON'T: pop shit like you Daddy Longdick
when you come fast like Fed-Ex and bust too quick
DO: hit positions she will find interest in
DON'T: hit the pussy if that shit's blisterin
Hope you're listenin, turn up your transisterin
Hot 97, KISS-FM
or B-L-S, with your hand up her dress
Chillin with your girl while you thinkin bout ya ex
Not too easy not too complex
I break it down, how to adress, the opposite sex
Problems or questions, I can answer them best
Signin off Dr. Knockboot at your request, peace
Rest havens
Fuck y'all bitches
Y'all niggaz get y'all shit tight
Dr. Knockboot gotta come take y'all bitches from ya!
AIGHT?! We out!

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in a month im goin to b a senior at my high school and for some weird reason im scared i dont get it cuz ill have my senior freedoms like goin out for lunch and a parking space but i think im scared of wats goin to happen next after high school like leaving all ur friends to make new friends and after this year if i get caught doing any thing im goin to jail real prison not juvi but prison. and i have to watch out for underage gurls lying bout the age cuz i dont want to be like r.kelly (i saw the tape it was him but he prolly didnt know the gurlz age) but i think school will b fun this year cant wait for it to come but im scared shitless lol
k im out

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