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 MidnightMonkey Age. 18 Gender. Female Ethnicity. freak ^.^ (aka~ me) Location North Las Vegas, NV School. Other » More info.                                | interesting day/ fun night Sunday. 8.21.05 4:32 am  And no you're eyes aren't decieving you... YES, I did cut off all my prettiful hair. It now only reaches to my shoulders... but the only problem I have with it is how easily it gets frizzy. And my eyes are soooooo effing awsome!!! Cause like... not even five minutes before I took this picture they were the same color blue as my shirt. Yea... damn... I know. My mom woke me up around 10am (which for me is early) to go with her to show Jr and Sherry (Jr's mom) where the funeral home is, cause Sherry wanted to see James before he was creamated, and then to go out to breakfast... just me and my mommy. It was pretty cool... we went to Sonic and sat there talking for like 20-ish minutes after we'd finished eating. Just about random stuff. Mostly about James and Matthew, and how if we don't get Matthew back anytime I want to leave Vegas all I have to do is tell her and we'll pack and go... but that we'll stay here as long as we can afford it cause I don't want to leave at least until I'm done in school. Then we came home and cleaned up a bit and I got my hair cut. Actually it's an inch or so shorter than I wanted it... but oh well it still looks nice. Around 4 I think it was... Anthony called and I went over there for a couple hours. After I'd been there for a bit Kevin showed up... said that he was trying to find someone to smoke w/ but then remembered that Tony doesn't smoke anymore and so he said he was bored and looking for someone to hang out w/. Being the genius he is Tony told him that I was there and that he didn't want to hang out... only afterward did he realize that he'd just put me in danger. Kevin is BJ's little brother... they live 3 houses down from me... BJ is engaged to Kyle... she (Kyle) wants me dead for something I did almost 3 months ago... Kyle was at BJ's house when Kevin was informed that I was at Tony's. I know Kevin well enough to know that he would go back home and tell Kyle and BJ where I was. Luckily they didn't go to his house and I completely forgot about it until we were almost home (my house). We turned into the neighborhood and we were joking around and just as we were about to go around the corner to get to my house we saw Kevin and Jr out front and leaned just a little bit so that we could see around the house that was blocking us from their veiw and, holy shit, there was Kyle and BJ as well. I almost died. I would've just kept walking tho, and gone into my house because I know Jr wouldn't let her do anything to me and that she can't do anything to me on my own property. But Anthony pulled me into the driveway of the house we were standing infront of and told me to call Jr & tell him to get rid of them. The five of us... Kevin ended up leaving just after we got home... stood around for a good 20 or 30 minutes talking and joking around. (okay, yes I admit I am afraid of Kyle... she's got a good amount against me and I'm not one for physically fighting others) After we got back we had a wonderful dinner that Sherry cooked and then around 10-ish, I'd say, we went out to the strip to wander around a bit. I'm really glad mom let Tony come w/ us... I would've been beyond bored, cause most of the time we were joking around, kissing, harrassing tourists, or stuff like that. Like... he's my boyfriend, but at the same time I kinda see him as my bestfriend too cause I can just have a really long conversation w/ him when I've got stuff on my mind, he's there when I need a shoulder to cry on, or just plain when I need him, he's been here everytime something happened (James dying, Darlene taking Matthew, me going thru my break-downs) and so he knows what all is going on... which makes it a lot easier cause I don't have to explain the situations to him, he already knows. ... but yea, I got off topic. It was really fun, cause all the time that I lived here before, and the year or so since I've been back, I never really got the chance to go see all the stuff on the strip or go and watch the lightshow down on freemont... or even spend time out w/ people I really love and get along with (most of the time). And so it was all just something new to me, but at the same time I felt like it wasn't... cause Tony knew where everything was, he just stayed back w/ me... mom had a good idea of all the stuff, but was uncertain on some things... and Steph knew exactly where everything was cause she lives right down there and considers it her part of town. And Jr and Sherry were just spending time together and enjoying their time out... as was I. I love that I can get out and do all this now, I feel almost like I've suddenly got freedom. Even if my mom is there along w/ Jr, Sherry, and Steph... I got to spend a good five or so hours on the strip w/ Tony. We only got back around 3:00... that's why I'm still up, but not for long tho. Well I'm out, I've got a couple other things to do before I sign off and go to bed. love, ~*Singe de Minuit*~ Comment! (2) | Recommend! new puzzle Thursday. 8.18.05 10:44 am Well things are holding up pretty well here. To me it just feels like he's in the hospital again, cause I'd never see him when he was up there (extreme fear of hospitals... I dunno why tho) and he was at the hospital so much lately that I guess it actually makes sense. I don't think the fact that he's gone has really sunk in to any of us, either that or we're all glad he's not suffering any more. Yesterday Crystal came so that she could see him. She was really pissed that she was too late and didn't get to apologize to him for what all she'd done. {o, and btw... crystal is another one of James' kids... my "step sister"~ although now I really have no connection to Matthew or Jr or any of James' kids. O well, I still consider Jr my older bro.} She stayed with us for the night and left back to Alabama at like 4 this morning. But last night, I must say, was fun. Okay, it was boring but at the same time it was fun. It would've been better if mom, Crystal, and Matthew weren't there. We; Mom, Matthew, Crystal, Jr, Steph (Jr's friend), Anthony, and I went down to Freemont for a while. The show (Freemont Experience) was pretty cool. That was the first time I've been down there. It would've been really boring if Tony hadn't've gone ~ cause like the whole time he kept me smiling. And he never let go of me either, except for when we went into one of the stores to get drinks. lol, I think Jr kinda suprised Tony though, cause he was talking to mom for me so that she'd let Tony come w/ us and Jr looked at her and went "C'mon! He's my future brother-in-law." The look on Tony's face was priceless. Well I'm gonna go. I wanna get back to my fishie game. There's a link to it on my clickables mod. (or at least there will be... I'm gonna put it on there in just a sec.) I'm addicted to the fishie game.  ~*Singe de Minuit*~ Okay, I'd said I'd do puzzles every so often, so here's a new one. It takes a bit to finish, but it's a really pretty picture. I wanna go there. Comment! (1) | Recommend! what's worse then Hell? Wednesday. 8.17.05 1:29 am right now things actually couldn't get worse. Mostly I'm worried about Matthew and my mom. I had Anthony here to help me pull thru ~ and he didn't go home until midnight and we're on the phone now... only an hour and a half later. Pretty much what it is... is that James died today at about 7:45pm mom's okay for now, I'm not so sure how she's going to hold on tho. Matthew really doesn't understand it... and I feel bad that he doesn't. Well I'm gonna go ~ I don't really have much to put. ~*Singe de Minuit*~ Comment! (2) | Recommend! late night thoughts... Saturday. 8.13.05 10:41 pm I'm bored out of my mind. ... Okay, and I'm not exactly alone. Jr and his friend Steph are in the living room watching TV, mom and James are in their room (yea... whoopdy fucking doo, James is home.), Matthew's in bed, and I'm on the computer ~ never would've guessed, would ya? I wish Anthony was here. We only spent 3 hours together today. (lol) Yesterday we were together all day since he woke up except for like... 3 hours. One was cause we were about to eat and mom told him he had to leave... so he went to Wendy's and got food. And the other two were cause he had to go home for a while, then he came back over. It was really nice. Hmmm... I still think I should've just gone inside when no one answered the door. I knew he was home. But I played it safe and called him and woke him up to tell him I was outside his house. ... hey, he'd told me around midnight that he wanted me to wake him up later that day, so I did. But yea, I'm really bored. I would be on the phone w/ Tony, but he left to go to his mom's house like an hour ago and a lot of time he doesn't use the phone too much when he's there. If I get to the point where I'm dying to talk to him I can just call his cell. Anywho... yea, I woke up today (for the third time) around 3pm and when I came out to get something to drink James was sitting out in the living room. ... what a thing to see first thing when you wake up. I dunno, I'm just not too cool by him. I know tho... I sound like really cruel and cold hearted when I start talking about James, but I have my reasons. Mostly that he's not my dad yet he still treats me like he is. He acts like he can run my life and make all of my decisions for me. He'll never be my dad tho... no one will. My dad died back in 1995, when I was five years old. For the longet time mom, Cheryl, and me made it thru life (recooperating, selling the house in Maryland, accepting that he was gone, and moving to Florida) just fine. Right before my 10th birthday my mom met James. I knew it was gonna be hell from day one. He hadn't even been at our house for and hour and he was already yelling at me about stuff that I was "doing wrong" that my mom had always let me do. Then he got mad at my mom cause she was spending time with me and my sister instead of him and his son. It's just all been fucked up since he came around. About the only thing's I'm glad about are 1. that I met Jr, 2. from the moving around that we've done I've met people that I'll never forget, and 3. we came here and I go to school with some of the greatest, craziest but greatest people in the world and I'm with Anthony. But still, over the course of five years, and only 3 good things have come out of this for me. Hell, he's actually the main reason that I became a cutter. And what sucks about that is... no matter how long it's been... a day, a week, a month, a year, three months, a week, and two days... since the last time I cut I'll always be classified as a cutter. Comment! (1) | Recommend! Nas ne dogonyat ~ a good song Friday. 8.12.05 5:06 am Nas ne dogonyat... Tol'ko Skazhe Dal'she nas dvoye Tol'ko ogni Aerodroma My ubezhim Nas ne Dogonyat Dal'she ot nikh Dal'she ot doma Noch' provodnik Spryach' nashi teni Za oblaka Za oblakami Nas ne naydut Nas ne izmenyat Im ne dostat Zvezdy rukami Nyebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne doganyat Nyebo uronit Noch' ne ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat My ubezhim Vse budet prosto Noch' upadet Nebo uronit I pustota na perekrestkakh I pustota nas ne dogonyat Ne govori, im ne ponyatno Tol'ko be nikh Tol'ko ne nimo Luchshe nikak No ne obratno Tol'ko ne s nemi Tol'ko ne s nemi Nas ne dogonyat... Nebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat' Comment! (2) | Recommend! What is there to say? Friday. 8.12.05 12:29 am Comment! (0) | Recommend! |
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