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Darth Maul
Many people argue that Darth Maul should have survived Episode I, but here's my theory.

Darth Maul had to die to show two things:
1) Obi Wan is a hard ass
2) Symmetry.

Now, the only thing that stops me is that Darth Maul does not look the way he does because it's his genes... no, those marks are tattooed onto his head... almost like George Washington, who had his face that we see tattooed on, when really he looked like Adrian Brody.

Darth Tyrranus may have sucked ass, but Maul needed to die. End of story.
dare I say I have no idea how this money thing works? But I have a feeling it's gonna rip my heart out at more than one point...

love, chris
Have you heard about Tyler Durden?
Sunday. 4.1.07 2:23 am
Oh my God.

Everytime I see Fight Club I want to do something completely and utterly destructive with my life.

Something huge.

Nothing Sayeed Al-Qaida Hamesh would do.

But something, just to prove a point.

Or at least get into a fight. I'm good at those...

Whatever, either way, thank God I'm so tired, because as soon as this movie ended I might have done something bad.

Anyway, I'll try to have a bit more for you all soon.

Love,
Chris

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Snuke.
Thursday. 3.29.07 10:13 pm
Snuke.

South Park keeps getting better and better, folks.

Love,
Chris

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The man, the myth... the legend.
Tuesday. 3.27.07 11:32 pm
Nation, I am a man of my word, and have decided to dedicate an entry to an admitted reader from Millersville.

I am of course talking about Brent Martin. Who told me on Saturday night that he loves to read the posts. So, here you go, bud.

And for the sake of perspective, people, this is what a Brent Martin is.



And now it's time for some stories.

Brent and I lived in Gaige Hall at Millersville last year. Didn't know each other until the second semester when I started hanging out on the stoop out front of the dorm. The stoop WAS a wonderful place where dreams come true and unicorns made of cigarette ash and dip spit wander peacefully about.

Anyway, everybody would smoke cigarettes (and other things) out there and just chill, and forget for a while that they were actually in school. Brent and I became fast friends via tobacco and alcohol. We realized we shared the same values and that we were very good at a very fantastic art. Shit talking.

Now please try to understand this. Gaige was inhabited by several "gentle giants" like myself. Brent is not a giant. And he knows this, but he is perhaps one of the most hilarious people I've met because if somebody says one thing that happens to be stupid or unnecessary, he can automatically flip a switch and with a straight face, berate and debase them for 10 straight minutes, meaning nothing by it, but certainly getting laughs out of everybody around him, even the person being belittled in most cases.

It was once discussed "what if wing 2C (my wing) and the G-Unit (Brent's wing) fought?"
After a lot of discussion about who would fight and everything it eventually came to the point where it would just be Brent and I standing in the middle of everybody else circled around talking shit.

But he's not all shit talking, nation. Mr. Martin is also capable of very generous acts, for instance, on my birthday last year, I was sitting on the stoop at one point and he came out and said "yo! birthday beer!" And in broad daylight we drank a beer on the stoop.

You need these kind of people in college, folks.

Anyway, before I wrap this homage to Brent Martin, here's a story.

Me, Brent, Dan Young, and a player to be named never are sitting in a dorm room one weekend night drunk and still drinking.

Dan says he can't drink beer if he's laughing too hard, so every time he tries to take a sip, the three of us are trying to make him laugh, and it's working for a while, and after inebriation makes us laugh for a while about the situation, we all calm down for a while, and Dan looks around and decides to take a sip. There is so much tension, because we want to keep it going, but we believe we've used up all of the hillarity.

The beer gets to Dan's mouth and with perfect timing out of nowhere, Brent just yells "MIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLK! MIIIIIIIIILLLLLLKKKK!!!!!!!"

Anyway, Dan didn't get much beer down after that.

And if you don't think Milk is funny, you don't know what funny is.

Love,
Chris

Post-Script: Let this set a precedent of admitted readers out of the NuTang community getting an entry posted in their honor. I believe this is a good idea, because by seeing the people who have surrounded me in my past couple of years of existence, you in the NuTang community will have a greater appreciation of who I am and will find the entries to be a lot more interesting.

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I EATED A BUTTER!
Monday. 3.26.07 9:34 pm
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That's my new favorite thing ever.

Love,
Chris

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Sunday. 3.25.07 4:55 am
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I sit here at a computer that is not mine.

Surrouded by people I've barely met.


Maybe drunk out of my mind.

Holy shit.

Wow.

By the way, an entire entry will be made to Brent Martin. He is a reader from Millersville. And he needs an entry one time.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYWWWWAAAYY
I need to pass out.

Enjoy, negroes.

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Isn't he dead?
Wednesday. 3.21.07 9:26 pm
Ladies and gentlemen.

I apologize.

But not really, I would update more often but my life is absorbed in work.

Anyway, here's a rundown on my life as of late.

I work 40 hours a week at a machine shop. So much better than any retail offering I could recieve.

My rib is healed, just in time for my shin to hurt like a bitch, due to the aforementioned job.

I discovered online connect 4 again, and I defy anybody to beat me at connect 4, it's not bloody possible.

I'm going to Millersville this weekend.

Speaking of Millersville, my apartment for next year is sealed.

Currently enjoying a Dunkin Donut's iced coffee -- free, bitches, I love spring even more already.

I'm super stoked on the new season of South Park, so far it's been slaying me.

Annnnnd well about time to start trying to sleep, gotta be up at 6 again tomorrow for another day of just pure and unadulturated lifting fucking steel. 8 hours of that, and I now know why people from Pittsburgh but french fries in everything... you need to treat yourself, ladies and gentlemen.

Anyways, nation, thanks for reading, I'm getting back to this thing, just let me phase it back into my life as I am still getting used to the workaday world.

Love,
Chris

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