i really dislike the rain. it ruins plans. it ruins everything. well except the plants. the plants must feel happy. but the rain jes makes me feel icky. and it has that nasty smell. and u get all wet. gross. which reminds me of when i was little and everyone little kid just loved to jump in mud puddles. but not me! i used to stay away from them! ((i still do btw!)) i NEVER liked mud puddles. and wen ppl jumped on em, well let's jes say i tried to stay away from them the best i can when around rain, water, and mud puddles. i still dislike mud puddles. u get all gross, dirty, and wet. then u hafta wait for minutes/hours till u get home to change into sum dry clothes. i never did understand why ppl loved jumping in mud puddles.

anyway..everyone seemed to be in a happy mood today..well for the beginning of the morning. first we went to drop off my bro to ccd. i miss ccd. it was so fun. we were like one big family. really really. i was stuck wit most of those ppl for like 3 years! it was great and really fun! it all started in 7th grade. i was REALLY sposed to be in a 6th grade class cuz i was held bak but luckily, the teacher was my mom's ex-boss. so she transferred me there. it was kOo. i was really quiet tho. i mean like wayy quieter than i really was/am. ah, memories. ok..bak to the rest of my morning...then me and mother when to the commissary and bought sum necessities. food. food. food. oh yeah, the happy mood. when we first got there we were standing by the sliding doors where ppl go out while we were lookin for a free cart and this dude was like "oh man. why you do this to me?! how am i gonna get home" he was talkin bowt the rain of course. hahah then yeahh i saw him when he sed that and we jes laughed. and then it was so weird cuz he was like "oh got them braces!" well sumthin like that. and then yeahh i sed "bye" and he sed "have a nice day!" and i sed "you 2" of course! to be polite. ((btw this is an old guy. well not old old. but u kno..so dont get ne ideas)) hahah. and then in the commissary, i was goin thru one of the aisles and this other old dude tried to go thru also so he moved aside and made a hand gesture to let me go and was like "good morning" and i sed that bak. and later he offered to get me sumthin from the top shelf..but i really dint need the help..hahah i was actually jes lookin for my mom cuz i dint kno where she was. i guess maybe he saw me wen i was lookin at sumthin from the top shelf for my brother cuz he keeps complainin he's getting pimples so i was lookin at sum acne things for him..see how nice i am!...but i dint really need ne help cuz i could reach it!! i'm not that short!! but hey it was nice he offered to help riiggh? fesho. so ne way we jes went thru the whole commissary. got food. the usual. did it all in about en hour. which is like..a first. then went bak to pick up the brother. and he wasn't even out yet! so like we rushed for nothing. they come out really late. then after that went to seafood city. i hate that place. i jes dread goin there. it's so dirty and disgusting. but i guess u get used to it once ur there. but i mean wen u jes think about going there it's jes so dreadful u jes feel like whining the whole way goin there. haha. and it was gay cuz my mom COULDA parked at like THE closest parking ever but nOo cuz she sed it was hard to get out. i was like whaat. so we parked at this faar ass parking spot. and that was jes the START of the bad mood that was yet to come. i dont exactly remember wha happened but he jes pissed me off. he jes started pushing me and shxt. and then like when we were in line..he pushes me when he goes thru the side so of course i put sum force bak when he tries to get thru. and then he blames me when he started it! WHATTA DUMBASS! i swear! i jes wanna slap his little wannabe smartass! gosh. loser. so that ruined my good mood. ne way, so when we were drivin home it was raining super hard. it goes soft then hard then soft. ((that dint sound right did it?! hahah)) so that was my morning.

i REALLY ACTUALLY hafta study for french..my test is like on wed. i think....and i dont kno how to set the table. ((there's a specific way))..and i also 4get the names of the utensils and stuff. and. gosh. french is jes so frikken hard! maybe its the teacher. she sucks. she reads from the damn book. its like dude a little explanation yo. and her explanations aren't even that good. she makes it sooo confusing. can't believe i hafta stay another year! thats whack. but it looks good for college so whatever.

speakin of college..i still need to do community service!! im planning to go tutor..or help little kids at a skOo during spring break for like a week..like i did lass time wit nicola ((which dint even count!!! but its ok i had fun! little kids are soOOo cute!!))...so yeahh...anyone got ne ideas or any place i can go help little children?! cuz i'd really like to go!

ok. this has GOT to be my LONGEST entry ever on nutang. weird. cuz this has got to be one of the boringest days ever! i want my four day weekend bak!! ok. later.

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man im so fuhrikken bored. i have no life. i only went to church today. had the kOo priest. and now i kno what it means to love your enemies. fosheezie. it dusn't mean to love them LOVE them..it has a diff meaning..a divine love...that u should love them and hope that they will come close with God u knowww..sumthin like that. hUmMm...and oh b4 that i went to the exchange and got this siickass lip gloss for a replacement for what i lost..hah..even tho i have like a grip now. but i like it! strawberry flavored. yum.

today's morse's asb ball. hope u guys have tons of fun! too bad we dont have that! no1 wants to go to the lame dances we have ne waise. besides for our last dance ((sweethearts dance)) they wouldn't even let us show sum shoulder! thats lame. i dont get whas the big deal. geeze. we're in hs. what're we gonna do?! lame man. our school is gay. ne who..so yeah, we dont even have an asb ball. barely have ne dances. barely have ne moolah. oh well. and oh yeah, u know how i was pissed off cuz the frikken gayass racist vp lady told me to roll mah pants down wen she dint do shxt to ne1..well she came into my dream lass night and i got her gOod! hahah she got in trubbO from..i think mr. espinoza ((the principal))...dont really remember. but maan too bad it was only a dream.

ooh star search! we'll talk latah.

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soo today's like a sports dress up day thing. so i wore my red windbreakers and pink sweater. and to style out mah outfit i kinda pulled up my pants yeno cuz it had that little garter thing and it looked tiight that way. lol. so as i was walkin thru the gates to enter the damn skOo riighh and then the stupidass lady bxtch for a vice principal tell me to roll my pants down so i jes sed "ok" yeno dont wanna cause a scene. then as i thot about it i saw that other ppl had their pants up and she dint do shxt i was like oh helll no fxck her stupid racist ass bxtch. jes cuz im filipino. i hate her. i've always hated her and last year was better without her! gosh. i hate her hate her hate her. she should go to hell. racist bxtch.

MAN NE WAYS at lunch i went to this thing where they had this speaker guy and stuff it was pretty kOo..i went for extra credit..haha but it was arrite tho. it wasn't really all that boring yeno. uhm then for 6th period we mostly went to one of the games...either soccer or basketball..and u kno i went to basketball. fesho fesho. and thats like all and now i have a headache.

hmm i kno there was sumthin i wanted to say bowt yesterday but i dont remember. i keep forgetting. bleh. ok. till nextime. laters.

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in first period today i was really bored and i felt like writing to sumbody but i dint kno who so i decided to write a sonnet..((well 2 actually))...what is a sonnet? a sonnet is a poem that has 14 lines, each line has 10 syllables...and the structure is abab cdcd efef gg ((meaning the last words rhyme according to same letter **a and a rhyme..)) you'll see...:

why is it that sometimes i think of you?
when sometimes it's like you just ignore me.
sometimes i think that i annoy you too.
somehow i'm going to get you to see
that i can also be a fun person
and the questions i ask is an excuse
cuz its you that i am really missin'
and my love is not gonna be misused
imma instill in ur heart who i am
so you'll know what i'm really all about
know what i'm telling you is not a sham
cuz i'm feelin' for you without a doubt.
until now i still dont know what it is
so i'll just end this with a goodnight kiss.



there's the little love poem. by the way love is for suckers hahaha..then i had a new topic to write about so then i made this:


so what does it take to be accepted?
i feel like i don't fit in anywhere
it's like i'm always being rejected.
somtimes i think that they dont really care
i just cover it up with a fake smile
sometimes i might even fake my laughter
and the pain i feel is over a mile.
fitting in isn't something you master.
it's supposed to happen naturally.
but for some it dosn't come that easy.
innocent acts end up as fellonies
and some girly girls can act so cheesy
maybe first i should accept who i am
then i prob'ly wouldn't be in this jam


a sonnet bowt acceptance and fitting in. sometimes its how i am. dus naturally and fellonies really rhyme? hah oh well. couldn't think of ne thing better.

well i guess thats all for now. i'm really hungrrryyy! k bye!

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i've decided that i jes MIGHT go out and join track and field. but only do a field event. i wanna do the pole vault **yeeuuhh** but mr. kane sed u need a speshul coach for that so he dusnt kno yet. ahh i hope he gets one! and i dont even kno wen my physical packet is due..allz i kno is is that im scheduled for nex tuesday. so i hope i can still turn it in nex week nawmean. yeuh. and if that dusnt work out..maybeeee i'll do the high jump....ne thing except running! there's no way in hell im gon go out and run. uh uh no way. that is one thing i am NOT good at. i guess that's the only "big" news 2day. so laterZzZz i feel like i had sumthin else to say..can't think of it...

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man..bak in skOo. skOo is whack. gosh. and i found out my fren and her bf are no longer together. guys suck! they should all suck their own d!cks! hahahah jes kidding! but really, guys really do suck. well some of them anyway. dont worry, i aint no guy hater..geeze after all i DO like em..well crushez u kno. ne who. really...where can i find a decent guy these days? there WAS this dude, but i dont kno. i mean wha dus it take for me to get a guy's attention?! wen all they do is stare at the damn tv all day! hahah geeeze. whas so good on tv these days ne way? besides we barely even talk. i think i bother him. sumtimes i think i ask too much questions. i think i do. but hey if he's not gonna talk..sum1'z got to right! hahahah. hmmm whatelse...oh yeah my fren told me sum guy likes me. but she wont tell me! if she's even tellin the truth! wha kinda whacko guy would like me ne waise?! but imma get her 2morrow. i'm not desperate to kno ne waise cuz the guys at this skOo...how can i get much hope? hahah no offense. besides she sed dat if she told me then i'd jes be like "eww". figures. so she should jes tell me. hahah. well i guess thats all foe now..latERrZz!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARYL L.!

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