Been a little bit since last post. But then, I don't have much to say. Being locked away in the house all day because you let your life go for an a-hole bf doesn't help. Maybe I should rename this blog to, "How NOT to have relationship." hehe

Comment! (0) | Recommend!

I sat outside today and felt a storm rolling in. They don't really roll in like they used to, at least not here. But I felt this sudden sense of understanding that I no longer cared for the way things are. Having limited resources and funds, change is very difficult to procure. I don't know why I stay. Don't be alarmed, I'm not going to do anything.... fatal. But I just wonder what is my point here. There are things I feel I cannot bear anymore, like I've finally reached my patience.

I hate the amount of deciete one sees constantly through put each day. Can you really trust anyone anymore? Yes, some. But for me very few. I am alone and pitifull. Very sad, oh my what a pitty pot! But I don't care. It may just be a phase, it may not. I just know that I feel very depleted, spent and tired. I don't want to try. But I make myself get up and do something in the day. Though there are moments when I laugh, they sure aren't caused by my boyfriend, whom I am beginning to despise very deeply.

I guess I just can't be pleased. But when I spend all day and night, week after week, month after month alone because I'm too needy and stupid to let go of my controlling tyrant boyfriend, I get a little crazy. And he wonders why I complain so much. He is the crazy one... My heart and mind both think I should run like hell! I swear we both hate each other. But then when it's time to go we both get sappy and cry and run right back.

How sick.... how sad.... how pathetic..... But hey, it's honestly me. Lonely pathetic fool...

On another note.......
can be a very painful, wasteful thing.. Even if it's fake.

Oh and by the way, new bird's name is Almond. But I still call it chicken...

Comment! (0) | Recommend! | Categories: life [t], perpose [t], time [t]

Not much to say this day. I am still giving the budgie, who seems less afraid than before, time to adjust. I don't know what to say, I have nothing to say really. It's just a monotonous existence so far......

Comment! (0) | Recommend! | Categories: personal [t]

This afternoon I went to my local petsmart and bought me a cute little yellow Budgie. I bought him his own cage, so he won't have to shack up with my other keet Kiwi. And I bought him a toy. Not a bad start for fifty bucks..... sheesh, anyway. 50 bucks, I spent less than that on a bigger cage AND Kiwi some years ago. Prices must be going up.

Anywhop, my betta is very needy and NEEDS a friend. If the males would die. What, is she that ugly or something? So, this little birdy needs a name.... But what?

Gimmie some ideas if you'd like. Unisex would be good as you never know sometimes, and remember that he is very yellow. And small. And cute. Got a name yet?

I'll help:

Sunny
Sol (spanish for sun)
Yeller (riiiiight...)
Pineapple Delight (huh?)
Pina Birdada (ok, enough already!)

Well, anyway, I happen to be drinking a pineapple soda right now, so....

Pina Birdada.... lol

Comment! (1) | Recommend! | Categories: birds [t], budgies [t], parakeets [t], pets [t]

But not this one. That is my personal online guarantee! You get nothing for the price of nil. All right... How about that... <----How did they get me on here?


watching: fuzzy channel 5
listening to: Smashing Pumpkins: Siamese Dreams
mood: Lonely,Depressed,Caged

Comment! (1) | Recommend! | Categories: blogs [t], personal [t]