san diego is boring.
it's not how i'd thought it'd be.

i know that i have to suck it up for the next 1 and a half years.
then i can do whatever i want.
it'll be a long while....
but i have hope that things will fall into place.

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. i let too many good things pass me by and wasted hapiness on too much of a bad thing.

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i'm so angry because some people are so freaking lazy.
so i've been away from my apt for the past couple of weekends and when i come back the kitchen is all fucked up. i mean there's soda cans and beer bottles all over the counter. the trash hasn't been taken out and it's actually over flowing and there's trash on the counters too. i'm just sooo pissed off because it's not like he does anything all day long that would stop him from taking out the trash or washing the dishes. what's more is that once i told him to take out the trash that hasn't been taken out since a couple days but apparently he couldn't do it because he was on the phone at the moment so i went out to take it out myself...and when i got back into the apt he freakin gets MAD at me because I TOOK OUT THE FUCKING TRASH. it's not like it's gonna take itself out so i took it out cuz it was bothering me. and just now i called to see if he wanted me to take him to the car dealership to get his car but he said it wasn't ready yet so i went back home and when i got back he got MAD because i didn't pick up my phone. i'm soo fucking sorry that i forgot to turn it back on from silent and i'm soo sorry that i'm giving you a ride to get it. i'm also pissed that this person is highly qualified to get a good job but always complains about how hard it is to find a job instead of putting energy into finding one. i also dislike people who get ahead of themselves and talk about all the things they want when they don't even have the money to get it/. and i fully hate people who make it a point to live off their parents money. i think it's stupid and pitiful especially when they should be able to make their own money but they do nothing all freakin day long.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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i was just looking at some pictures that i forgot about and i realized that getting rid of certain people in my life has made it better. no matter how harsh it may sound. it's the truth.

it's not a lie that certain people in my life brought the worst out in me or maybe just didn't bring out enough in me to make me better or even want to be a better person. sometimes people just weigh you down and i felt like there were a few people in my life that did that. they never let me forget the mistakes i made and all the could ofs and should ofs in all the things that happened in my life. living with all that regret sucks. so getting rid of someone in life that made me feel like that all the time was all i could do. i mean afterwards i was able to put everything behind me and i'm glad that happened. i mean instead of looking back i should be looking forward and it's always just to forget past mistakes...

don't worry though, right now the people in my life are what i need. =) and i wouldn't trade anyone for any reason...=) i just wanted to note that the quality of my life has changed for the better and i'm gonna keep it like this.

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today is my bday. it's an ordinary kind of day as it should be.

the past couple of weeks:
i dropped out of community college and quit my job by not showing up when i was supposed to. they haven't called me so that's their problem but i do miss their coffee is was really good.

i moved to san diego and i now go to sdsu and i'm studying public health. i have yet to buy some books and read them. i'm still trying to settle in and organize myself here. the area is nice but my apartment could be in a better area than this. i have a lot of exploring to do and i'm gonna do that all once i'm all settled in.

most of all i really miss riverside and the people. i miss SOPi and affiliated life. i'm an 1 1/2 away so i'm hoping to go down there for stuff every now and again.

i kinda miss seeing my mom like every week. i miss bugging her to take me places and to help me with stuff. so i'm glad i spent the summer in oxnard. hopefully all goes well with grad school and my mom could finally retire. she deserves it...

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