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Right now I wish...
the world was flat
Quotes of the day
Is that a kind of occupational hazard of soul mates ? One's not much without the other ?
- what dreams may come

Can miles truly separate you from friends.... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? ~Richard Bach

"I'll love you till the ocean is folded and hung up to dry" -W.H Auden

I'll wait so longingly for you to need me... want me... notice me...

"If looks be the reflections of the mind, the thoughts that in that head are not what they used to be- those thoughts which I knew so well." - De Maupassant in "A Family"

Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.

If you don't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a lot longer than you want it to.
-garden state
For you-- John Denver
Just to look in your eyes again
Just to lay in your arms
Just to be the first one always there for you
Just to live in your laughter
Just to sing in your heart
Just to be everyone of your dreams come true

Just to sit by your window
Just to touch in the night
Just to offer a prayer each day for you
Just to long for your kisses
Just to dream of your sighs
Just to know that Id give my life for you
For you for the rest of my life
For you all the best of my life
For you alone, only for you

Just to wake up each morning
Just to you by my side
Just to know that you're never really far away
Just a reason for living
Just to say I adore
Just to know that you’re here in my heart to stay

For you for the rest of my life
For you all the best of my life
For you alone, only for you

Just the words of a love song
Just the beat of my heart
Just the pledge of my life, my love, for you
Profile

Hobbies peer educating, road trips, dancing at Ghost Riders, music, listening), going on random excursions.

College Slippery Rock,

I Like french vanilla cappaccino, pineapple, buffalo chicken, walking in the rain, looking at the stars, watching the sun set, going for long hikes, being around kids, chocolate, mexican food, random road trips, card night

I don't Like heights, the dropping feeling on amusement park rides, people who think that they are better than everyone, humidity, olives, people who don't use turn signals

awesome cd in mind
Believe- gavin degraw
more than anyone- gavin degraw
meaning- gavin degraw
folow through- gavin degraw
I'll be- Edwin McCain
The reason- Hoobastank
Iris- Googoodolls
It only hurts when I'm breathing- Shania Twain
Running away- Hoobastank
100 years- five for fighting
blurry- puddle of mud
wonderwall- oasis
champaign supernova- oasis
someday- nickleback
dremaing of u -selena
1st cut is the deepest- sheryl crow
For you to notice- dashboard
My immortal- evanescence
Wonderful Tonight- Eric Clapton
I'll follow the sun- Beatles
Walk Alone- Green Day
Under the Bridge- Red Hot Chili Peppers
can't stop - red hot chili peppers
saliva- rest in pieces
crash and burn- savage garden
every breath u take- the police
White Flag- Dido
One thing- Finger 11
Collide
Drift away- uncle kracker
When a man loves a woman
drops of jupiter- train
let it be- beatles
country cd in mind
the dance- garth brooks
she's in love with the boy- garth brooks
If i'm not in love- faith hill
breath- faith hill
there you'll be- faith hill
cry- faith hill
I melt- rascal flats
i'm movin on- rascal flats
these days- rascal flats
love you outloud- rascal flats
Let's be us again- lonestar
amazed- lonestar
I need you- LeAnne Rimes
she's my kind of rain- tim mcgraw
i like, i love it- tim mcgraw
favorite oldies cd
when a man loves a woman
wonderful tonight
unchained melodies
say a lil prayer
aint no mnt high enough
faithfully- journey
open arms- journey
I am happy because
new friends
What I am greatful for
the best parents in the world! ftball games, going for walks, going out to dinner, card night, my FRIENDS, awesome conversations, the ability to experience life to the fullest.
to do...
lose 20
sell back book
make mom's cd
clean room/bthroom
gym gym gym
visit eric, becca, kate, katie, kara
currently...
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I'll be there...always

...I am trying to lose weight, but it keeps on finding me. -author unknown
uh oh spaghettios
Thursday. 5.27.04 8:17 pm
I'm getting sick... swollen glands, can't swallow. This can't be good... Ohhhhh well. *thinking happy thoughts* We're going out for whatever u call eating at 10:30am tomorrow after cap and gowns. Agreed that white roses are romantic and pure, yellow ones are cheerful and spirited, pink ones are graceful and mature an red ones are just too traditionally blahed. I love my friends! It might not turn out how any of us dreamed it to be or wanted it to be, but with us involved it will turn out a memorable time. Ugh I am feeling too sick to think of anything else to write, so I shall retire to the couch. night all.

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TIME GETS BETTER WITH AGE.
Thursday. 5.27.04 3:51 pm
However, this is enlightening... I picked out my favorites.

Age 5- I learned that our dog doesn't want to eat my broccoli either.
Age 12- I learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up.
Age 15- I learned that silent company is often more healing than words of advice.
Age 26- I learned that wherever I go, the world's worst drivers have followed me there.
Age 29- I learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
Age 30- I learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don't know how to show it.
Age 64- I learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if you focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.
Age 82- I learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch-holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
Age 90- I still have a lot to learn.

Obviously we continue and never stop learning throughout our lives and that is what makes each new stage so difficult. My dad once told me that first...they say teenage years are the worst, and then u go to college and those in their own way are tough, then marriage is rough, then raising a family has its ups and downs, then ur job challenges u countless times, then retirement has its pressures... and so forth. The morale of that story is not that life continues to suck but that life is full of new stages, new experiences and so new trials. Right now we are dealing with some and soon we'll be dealing with others. I guess it is how we approach and meet these times that determines how happy and successful we are. For now... stop planning, just start living, and take advantage of every moment u have with someone to sit back and appreciate them and reflect why this person chooses to be in ur life... and appreciate urself.

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pre ughness
Thursday. 5.27.04 10:54 am
Hell, if I'm not gonna fit into my dress anyway, why try to lose 8 pounds by tomorrow? There are tons of parties in school this last week... aww Senor gave all of us "premios" today. I got the Miguel de Cervantes- por mi gran habilidad de escribir en espanol. Psych olympics is awesome! (pictionary, password, and more to come tuesday) One more day of school! (of normal classes, then it is finals) Tomorrow is gonna be crazzzy.. school at 8am, pick up caps, gowns, pose for '04 picture, go home, get haircut at 2pm, go to Court's to get ready, hide so Tom can pick up Court alone, appear after they do pictures, go to Tom's for pict, drive to get Dave and Lorna, pict at both their freakin houses, thenn to Hershey Hotel by 6 for pict THERE in the gardens... goodness I am realizing how ridiculous this is gonna be and I will just be a nusiance tagging along... hmm maybe this is why I was so adamant about NOT going. ugh. Then around 11 a few of us are regressing back to Court's to swim (like 5 of us only) and then I dunno after that... go home? wooh, sounds like funnnn.... *grimace* I know that it is not fair to not like someone before I even meet them, but I am not looking fowward to having to spend the whole night with this chick I don't know... going in with a negative "it would've been easier if I went with ur date cuz it would've kept our lil group" is not helping, so yea... *smile* and suck up and deal.

anywayzzz... I love my parents n I wish I was sharing them... haha as weird as that sounds I love how awesome they are that I wish my friends who have not so awesome parents could just share mine. Annnnd my brother was missing yesturday, my parents had to shell out another $150 that they dont have for some medication bc he doesn't have fuckin health insurance OR a job. gahhh. Ok, well that just sort of added to my ...what was great mood but now is "very unfestive, disheartening, not looking foward to the weekend" mood. *breath* (which is also hard to do these days, I thought I had mono for a bit but I think it was just some freak excessive tiredness) soooooo....

Familiarity... another double edged sword.

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wooh
Wednesday. 5.26.04 9:44 pm
I love... a lot of things, mostly I love being around some people. whether it is talking in class, chillin in the car, weightlifting, at dinner, walking down the hall... I also love feeling giddily comfortable, that care free flirtatiousness (?) and manner, those serious, insightful conversations that allow me to sit back n go, "ah....", reconnecting, those moments where a hug would be more than called for, and those few where the words "I love you" (as a friend and a person) are actually said... *sigh* (oh yea, I also love *sigh* moments)

3- 70lb bench presses.
Senior dinner at 6:30! (hypnotist).. it wasn't as funny as I expected but some of it was hilarious, esp Chris L and his ice down his pants, Dan running outside and back in for a drink of water, Erin's finger stuck to her nose and the few kiddos in the audience who mistakenly went under hypnosis too.
Before hand- Went to the mall with Dave and Li. Picked out an entire outfit (including shoes) for David to wear... "u'r here for a reason, does it look good? u tell me!" *pat on the back* hehe.
Tuxes are so funny... 'I feel frumpy!' hehe
It tis it tis a good day! *grin*

I'm gonna miss my weightlifting buddies... dan, tom, dave, clint. my bio therapy group, coni, cassi, liz. and my lax underclassmen, lauren, schmucker, barkanic, mathis. *sigh*

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she said it like a true meggyo.
Tuesday. 5.25.04 9:43 pm
Once again I got to hear my own words come flying back at me and I realized how hard it is to follow one's own advise and how powerful it is to just hear it from someone else's mouth.

"I don't deal well with inconsistency" ... "does anyone?"
stepping stone, reason, season
"Someone came cuz u needed them to"
"when u don't need someone they will leave and u have to know that that is ok."
"stop thinking! u'll be much happier."

There is a profound amount of reassurance when u are living ur days side by side or at least had for a long time with a friend and u start wondering if u will remain friends for a long time.

Patience is truely a virtue.

I worry too much.

Someone told me recently that I set myself up for dissapointment by expecting so much from people or always hoping for the best... sure it is dissapointing but I'd like to think that that ONE time when someone proves me wrong and steps up to that expectation that it will be worth it and real.

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revolution
Tuesday. 5.25.04 4:34 pm
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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