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the choice i have to make
PROFILE the term doppelganger describe me in a certain way as i'm not whom i seem to be, to my friends i bring joy and laughter, to my family some pride but mostly a sense of dispair... to have an alter ego that treat others with respect and how i behave towards certain group of pple is what i'm doing..and i have been doing it for so long that the i dun even know the real me... so i'm lost and basically trying to find which doppelganger i want to be... the gentlemanly person who follows all the rules and becomes a nice but boring person OR a rascal that breaks all the rules and have fun resulting in a peson that nobody likes coz i can be quite an ass...so confusing but thats bascially my life my previous grievance motive in life
Growing old is inevitable, Growing up is optional... Someone else pain is someone else happiness... To love is to know when to let go... To love someone, u have to give her the best, even if the best isn't u... Listen to ur heart, ur eyes may trick u, ur brain may be muddle, but ur hearts knows the way... Death is lighter than a feather, Duty is heavier than a mountain... song of the month
Artist: Nickelback Song: Photograph Look at this photograph, everytime I do it makes me laugh. How did our eyes get so red, and what the hell is on Joey's head. And this is where I grew up, I think the present owner fixed it up. I never knew we ever went without, the second florr was high for sneaking out. And this is where I went to school, most of the time had better things to do. Criminal record says I broke in twice, I must have done it half a dozen times. I wonder if its too late, should I go back and try to graduate. Life's better now than it was back then, if I was them I wouldn't let me in! Oh oh oh... Oh God I! Every memory of lookin' out the back door, I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. Every memory of walkin' out the front door, I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. We used to listen to the radio, and sing along to every song we'd know. We said someday we'd find out how it feels, to sing to more than just the steering wheel. Kim's the first girl I kissed, I was so nervous that I nearly missed. She's had a couple of kids since then, I haven't seen her since god knows when! Oh oh oh... Oh God I! Every memory of lookin' out the back door, I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. Every memory of walkin' out the front door, I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. I miss that town, I can't believe it, So hard to stay, So hard to leave it. If I could relive those days, I know the one thing that would never change. Every memory of lookin' out the back door, I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. Every memory of walkin' out the front door, I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for, It's hard to say it, time to say it, Good-bye good-bye. Look at this photograph, everytime I do it makes me laugh. Everytime I do it makes me... | @#&^*%%^#$ Thursday. 2.24.05 somebody save me...
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jus give me a hard whack... Comment! (4) | Recommend! slacking Sunday. 2.20.05 went down to meet jac and wilson for dinner, genna con by wilson into buying a bottle of drink... slack ard the place, moving from jac booth to wilson booth, stayed at jac booth cos got a nokia promoter nearby that looks quite sweet although jac say she ah lian pai one... weird encounters alore...genna stop by an insurance agent that apparently wanted to bring me out for dinner, dun know if some promotion or she jus damm friendly... lend a guy my phone and chatted with the guy, later he also genna con by wilson into buying a drink... talkative fellow... spending the time looking for chio bu...saw a few, reminded of pple... which i dun wanna be reminded of... suppose to watch the chingay but didn't see the point in crowding ard and watching it alone... walk ard seeing pple, doing nth and generally slacking... wait for wilson and jac to finish work then slack at spinelli for a while, sighing mood prevail and decide to go home while jac and wilson met up with 05 to go drinking... why must i be reminded of u... no future together...i know we are not compatable, so i shall keep that in my mind always... dun be blur blur must be clear piority is given coz my time is mear crap... Comment! (0) | Recommend! forgot myself Thursday. 2.17.05 recently have been to busy...pull down by stuff and feelings, forgotten what i have taugh myself... i'm not the person i used to be but i'm not as weak as i make myself to seem... the power of positive thinking has always been my guiding light with the right mindset there is nth that i can't do...proven fact, just that i forgoten its there, its time to stop feeling pessimistic and start thinking good thought again Comment! (0) | Recommend! studies is it worth it??? Wednesday. 2.16.05 In lecture today, my lecturer ask my friend a questions... the answer she gave was not correct and not wrong but what set my mind thinking was that how little i have learn in my years in poly... my grades count for nth if i cant remember what i have learned before... then later had a marketing career talk, guest speaker talking abt their experience and behold, what they say was that Attitude and work exp was more important then paper qualification but then at the end they say that without qualifications u can't get a job and then where are your experience??? test, projects, bane of my life... can't seem to get anything right, standard performance from me ain't worth shit in the real world, come to think of it its abt the same in poly... used to think that i will accomplise things in my life, now i'm jus a lost boy struggling to find the way again... studies, studies,studies whats the point of studying if you jus forget abt it in another few years??? peace this is jus a few grumblings...its not what i feel so dun worry abt it Comment! (0) | Recommend! all that glitters is not gold Saturday. 2.12.05 as my heading suggest what this entry is abt i shall dive straight to the point. i find that the younger generation tend to want thing to be done in a prettier manner, things must look nice, everything must be graceful and face saving.... for me i;m stuck in a dilemma... i find that i try to make my life a beautiful picture, and i admit who doesn't??? but i also realise why do i make so much effort to make it that way when a cruder manner can establish the same results ??? if u look in ur life, money can be one simple example,some people will not accept coins!!! why??? are not coins money??? i mean they are heavier then notes but they serve the same value am i right??? why do u want to make things so complicated when a simpler method can solve the problem??? other thing in life can be the same, a person will also look for a person whom they find attractive, some of my friend have great personality and they are still single due to the fact that not many pple can look thru to their inner beauty... even i at time will look for a more attractive person to talk to then to a less attractive one... why ?? why??? what abt pple with physcial deformatives??? we shudder and try to avoid them, never understanding their pain and suffering... is looks that important??? is it becoz of our upbringing??? now that we have so much more to begin with... we are more educated, more civilised, less willing to get our hands dirty??? in time not long ago, the older generation struggle thru life, never caring how dirty the job is jus to get thru their life, they never care abt personal image or anything else, they belive in that the have to do what they have to do regardless of the cost... haiz... we have becoming more civilised at the cost of moral upbringing... i dunnoe why i talk abt this, i guess its jus that i sometimes cant tand the attitude of the pple ard me and sometimes my attitude in the same situation... all that glitters is not gold, and some that are shiny are fakes... Comment! (1) | Recommend! thinking... Monday. 2.7.05 hm... what can one day in though do for u??? well for me... thinking consist of slp and pondering stuff, why am i like that, why do i react in certain ways to certain things, and it has finally cross my mind. its not worth it... i know the benefits if it does happen will make everything worthwhile, but the reality is there... it takes too much of my effort to be jealous and thinking of what if sceneario... i shall let it be... friends have told me to let it be and its not worth my changes... haha... thinking abt it, i have done nth abt it, so why shld i be mindful abt it??? i shall not be bothered abt this anymore and this hopefully will be my last entry on this subject.... on to brighter points... i realise i have weird cousins...dun ask me why...they are jus plain werid...*chuckles* well holiday are here, dun feel the mood, never felt the mood for a long time, think i have too much responsibility and forgottem how to jus have fun... well that it for now.... gg to watch some vcd with my family....haha...family bonding Comment! (0) | Recommend! |
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