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Today the Internet feelz....
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Mmk this is all about me~smilez~
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Tuesday. 10.19.04 12:19 am
~sighz~tis official im thinkin no one readz me nemore*cries*o well i guess thats life....maybe I should just stop writing in this nemroe....

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~*carz and crashez*~
Wednesday. 10.13.04 10:42 am
Omg!!!!JOsherz got into a crash last night on his way to work!!but hes ok~sigh of relief~he like called and me was like I dont have a truck nemore....~heart stops~and im likw why and then he told me. The people that crashed into him were in a car and they got hit in like the middle of the car. They even had a baby in the back!!!! what the fuck is wrong with that picture?!?!?if you have a baby in your car you dont drive like that. Dumbasses!!!neways IM just glad everyone was ok. He just said the cars looked like hell. Aunties going to take me over there today so I can see himand see whats what.*lovez*~lata

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wow....
Monday. 10.11.04 4:17 pm
its so fucking amazing how fast someone can not care about u....it was like what 20 minutes?!but ya like w/e it never lasts long"lagrimas"

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Monday. 10.11.04 2:52 pm
herm I guess Im ok right now..well no not really. Im actually quite pissy and theres a reason but some would just call me supid for thinking so.If you know me well you know that Im the type of person who cares. I will give and give until I can't give anymore(which isn't often). I usually make friends with anybody and everybody and my friendships with them are usually more than most friends are to eachother. Im a lover not a hater and I listen, I help, I do whatever I can for whomever. It doesn't matter what it is. All anyone ever has to do is ask and if I can do it I will. I was let down all the time by my family so I won't ever do that to anyone else. Over the past year or so I have made a lot of online friends. I care about each and every one of them. It's not just one of those pasing phases where I just wanted to talk to someone for a few minutes. I care about these people, people I have never even met! and it seems to me that lately I don't matter until they need something. They are too fucking busy for me. All I want to do is check in and see how they are doing and they tell me they are just not in the mood to talk. Well, Im never in a mood to talk because everyone is always trying to abuse the love I give out so freely. Im just so tired of having everyone not care until they feel like it.For any relationship to work you need communication but whatever I guess I am just a bit more pissy then usual. I had a good weekend I guess. Feeling like majorly crappy but that is to be expected right now~bleh~I had to work today but it's all good because I got more money to go toward my secret plan~smilez~My mom said she might get me a guitar for my bday that would be so awesome! Im like so wanting a guitar I have for like the longest time so I can make music for the songs that I have written. Anyways went to josherz nieces bday.She turned four she was so cutse. Shes like so enamored with me its so cutse.We went to the mall a few times it was fun except for my feet hurt really bad afterwards. But he got a new cell and gave me his old one so we can call eachother when hes gone on his trips and stuff so yeah. Then we went out to dinner and we had a really good talk about us adn everyone else. Im so happy when Im with him.And yes we have our fights but we are working on the whole communication thingy and all that. All couples have to figure it out. It doesn't exactly come naturally!But I don't give up on anything and he knows he can't get rid of me now so hes stuck hehee. His mom loves me and so does everyone else I have met so I think everything is good.~smilez~I miss you too terr-berr and I know I haven't been on much but I been sorta busy and stayin away from home because it's so depressive and all but newayz hopefully talk with u soon*loves*~lata

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~*sighz*~
Thursday. 10.7.04 10:00 pm
Does neone even read this nemore?...I don't think y'all do at least you don't comment anymore. To answer your Im Terr-berr Im alright I guess. Yesterday josherz and I had this really huge fight and it was just bad and well....~sigh~I was stupid and tried commitin stupidity by takin a whole shit load of pills. The only thing that happened though was me waking up on my bedroom floor when I distinctly member being in the living room~shrugz~I dont know. But we talked things out and things are better now. He wanted to give me back the necklace I bought him and told me I ddin't deserve how he was treating me and that he didnt deserve me and blah blah and I was like damn it I know what I can take and ya stuff like that. We need to work on communication. Like any normal couple. But Im doing okay. The only reason I dont talk to u terr-berr is cuz were never on at the same time because of your job and crap like that.But its kool .I hope your doing good and ur girl is good and yall's relationship is going better than mine. Leave me a comment damnit or I swear Ill wuit updating.... maybe I should then u might pester me though=Pnewayz~loves~terr-berr**lata

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~early~
Wednesday. 10.6.04 9:48 am
Gah why the hell am I up so early?!?!?! I have no fricken idea. But I couldn't go back to sleep if I wanted to. It' slike I went ot bed around 1am and woke up around 6am. Im still tired though I just can't sleep!!and that sucks big time. I dont know I guess Im just thinking about everything. I have been thinking about the fact that Josherz keeps trying to buy me a ring and everytime he thinks about doing it something always gets in the way. Personally I think it's a sign. Im the type of person that watches for things like that, I keep myself open to everything. You never know what you might find. Lately I been getting the feeling that thingz are going the way they are because Im supposed to be the one proposing to him. I have the money to do it and everything. I just haven't gotten dwon there to do it. It wasn't so clear to me as it was yesterday. Even though we hade that fight. Ill write more laterz.

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