Naruto is scheduled to air on Cartoon Network later this year! I'm excited!

Eversince that day i accidently almost caught air over a curb, my car's supension has been so shitty. I feel like i'm driving a freakin go cart. Help, I need money to fix it! I'm so temped to take some out of my securities account. My bro said he's giving me his 2002 WRX. Its got a blow off valve, sounds really cool! I'm excited!

OMG, Rebecca, my Harvard summer school roomate emailed me last night! It's the first time i'm heard from her since school was over. We both applied to BU and Cornell. Maybe we might be roomies agian, hehe.

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take the streets, completely



I hope he's doing alright. He hasn't been online for two weeks now...

I went to the Mongolian Grill with Edie for lunch today. It was really good. They have a buffet of raw veggies and meets and then you hand your bowl to a person that grills it by walking in circles around a round grill. Yes, I am easily amused. Then we went into Expressions and that was really amusing too. Penis shaped bobbing things. What kind of sicko would put that in their car? There was a huge glass penis...I hope nobody tries to use it...ouch.

Ahhh, i'm so tired of school. So much useless work and effort. Come on..making a Macbeth sountrack? So much effort for just a grade. I would rather just take a freakin one hour test than spend 4+ hours doing a project. Its just more work for the sake of more work.

God, i want to just take a break from my life. I wanna travel somewhere to just get lost and have fate take me where it wants me to go. Hopefully, i'll land where my heart truely wants to go. The place that i'm not sure I should go, not sure of what would happen, not sure I would find what I was looking for.

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You know how when you first meet someone you like, and you trying to get to know them...it can be so awkward at times. You get really shy, don't know what to say, laugh at wierd times. But its the weirdest thing, after the first kiss, everything just comes together, you connect...a magical chemistry. Then you feel really hot and just want to get to...nevermind, i'm not going to get into that. :P

*SIGH SIGH SIGH*

I had a really bad series of dreams last night. I was in a convienence store, and I asked this guy what time it was. He turned around and it turned out to be Steeve's dad, and steeve was next to him. He pretended not to recognize me. But when i saw him, of course i went into tears, and he couldn't keep up the act any longer. Then, it was terrible. I found out that he was with this other girl and she kept saying really bitchy thing...I ran out...he followed me out...i said i had to go..I was actually in Canada...he lived in Canada...don't know why i was there but it was only a 5 minute walk away...wierd. Then, i just started running... i was running forward, but backwards at the same time!

WHY CAN'T I JUST FORGET COMPLETLY ABOUT HIM? If i could have 1 wish...

Then i had a dream about Hemingway's monsters. I had to solve his riddle that was hanging on the wall of a creepy room and when i did, these horrible monsters came out. I think it was one of the scariest dreams i've ever had...Hemingway's monsters? I'm going crazy!

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I was just thinking...could there really be a parallel between 1984 and Osama bin Laden/Bush? Could bin Laden be just another "Goldstein"? I mean, its been so long and nobody has captured him yet. Maybe he doesn't even exist. Like in the book where people are screaming and throwing things at the telescreen during 2 minutes hate, i could imagine people doing the same thing while seeing bin Laden on TV. And Bush is like Big Brother...all must love Big Brother. TV's and intercoms...you hate them, but they seem neccesary in a wierd way.

If I could have any superpower, what would i want? I've heard people wanting to be able to read minds, but that would only be cool occasionally. I would get really hurt, and feel really awkward knowing what people are thinking all the time. How about the power to heal. No...then I would feel like I need to heal everybody. I think I would just like to be able to fly. That would be so awesome. Saves insurance money, gas, time. Hell, i could start my transporting service to make money. Grrr, i'm so stupid writing about stupid stuff.

Spring break is just a week from friday, YAY! I'm so excited!!!

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I take it back, the book couldn't have ended any other way. It was perfect.

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I just finished 1984 and i'm so disappointed by the ending! I mean, I knew the book was going to end that way, but I wished that somehow...gah. It would've been impossible. I hated the last sentence of the novel. It's given me a permanent hatred for communism. How much would I want to commit suicide if i lived in such a negative utopia (heh, thats almost doublethink) Then agian, would I be just another one of them, would I love Big Brother too?

I'm starting to feel a lot better. I have to have a cycle...after a period of downs, the period of lesser downs feels much better, if that made any sense. I wrote a letter to him. I just wrote about what's been going on and asked him how he is doing. I have an idea why he won't speak to me...so I don't care if he doesn't write back. I just have a feeling that because he still cares, he'll appreciate the letter. And if i'm wrong, so what. I'm not holding on to any hopes or intentions of getting back together with him at all, but i still care about him and i wish there was someway we could still be friends. Sounds so cliche, but after such an intense emotional and physical relationship, why should we just forget each other? Does that really help lesson the hurt, or make it worst?

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