hehehehehe my webcam is fun. joe watched me on it for about an hour or so. he kept saying i was silly. he watched my siblings try to kill me. i loves my webcam. i just dunno if i should have told him...he said that he is gonna ask to watch me on it all of the time...ohhhhhh noooooooo well i am gonna go now

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wow, today has actually been good and i am sorta happy. i dunno why i am though. i sent joe a bunch of more pics and that made him happy. i even sent him the one he dared me to send him. he is so silly. hahahahaha i think all i ever do is talk about him...well anyways i am listening to korn's new cd, take a look in the mirror. i like it. well i think that i am gonna go. maybe i will be able to write a poem or something. i haven't been able to for a while. there was just nothing to inspire me. i haven't been able to write anything really every since i thought joe was cheating on me. now that i know that he isn't and that it was just a misunderstanding, i am trying to dedicate as much time as i possibly can showing him that i love him. he says that i am so adorable. o.O he is gonna send me more pics of him. i can't wait. yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!! well i am gonna go now.

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joe kept begging me to send him pics of me last night and he wouldn't stop. i sent him at least 10 or 15. i dunno why he wants so many...he kept asking for some ummm...yeah pics but i wouldn't do that. he told me that i'm damn sexy and that he is lucky to have me. i think that i am the lucky one. i have never known anyone quite like him. also, i have never had anyone love me the way he loves me. he is just so beautiful...it is so hard to put it in the right words. i wanna be there with him. i wanna express my love for him better. but i can't grrrrrrrr well someday i will. i cheered him up last night. a wave of depression hit him and then i sent him some pics of me in my witch hat and he said it cheered him up a little bit. i loves my hat and he says it makes me look so adorable. hehehehehe

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o.O my camera is sooooo cool. i loves it!!! i am still depressed, but at least i got a cool present. i am gonna take pics of my half sister and half brother hehehehe. i just wish joe was here. then it would all be pretty good. he is just so sweet. last night i said that maybe someday we will be together and he said there is no maybe, that we will. i wanna be with him more than anything in the world. so until then, all holidays are pretty much gonna suck. well now that i think about it, all days suck hahahahaha well i am gonna go now and merry christmas everyone.

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..jen is gonna stay with bekka even though bekka cheated on her. she hopes that bekka is gonna change but i dunno. people just don't usually change. i am afraid that bekka is gonna hurt jen again. no one deserves to be treated the way bekka treats jen...i hate her so much. jen is so in love with her that she can't realize what is really going on. oh well, she will eventually. well anyways, i gots korn's new cd. yay for me!!! i loves it. hehehehe well i am gonna go now.

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i don't wanna go to my mom's fiancee's mom's today. my mom is making me go. i dunno anyone there and it is gonna be so boring. my bf said to find an evil way to enjoy myself hehehehe i think i am gonna bring my cd player there and listen to it the whole time. nothing against the people and all, it is just that i can't stand most people. i still dunno why i have to go. and o.O i looked at my christmas presents even though i wasn't supposed to. one of my presents is a digital camera/webcam. i asked my mom for this, but i am suprised she got it cause she never gets me what i ask her for. well that is one thing that is good about christmas...my dearest joe wants a bunch of pics of me hahahahaha well i guess i could give him some tomorrow, but i hate pictures, they are evil!!!!!!!!!!!! and so are hugs...grrrrrr

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