It's kind of crazy looking at Facebook, because you know, the moment that someone get's married, that is going to be their Facebook picture for the next YEAR and then when they have kids, it's going to be all about their kids. So, you haven't seen this person is ages and you're like "WOW! They're married? When did they get married..."

I was doing that today with a family friend, someone I hadn't known since we were arguing over who would play the 'mom' in our basement playroom. I looked at her and I thought, "She looks good" and then I thought "She's married?" and then "And HE's actually hot!"

"For heaven's sake, Jin." "You can't just say that about people. You can't be comparing people's husbands!" But... I do. I mean, am I the only one who looks at someone's photo and is like "Dang it! They're married, too... but... it's not like he's that hot, anyway." I think that's why it hits you harder when your EXs get married... because they always marry HOT people that seem totally perfect for them. And you're like "... Okay, so I'm happy for you that we broke up." And then you feel all weird for the rest of the day, because you kind of want to be mad at them? But you know, if you're me, you probably were the one who broke up with them...

What this amounts to is that I really have to get a handle on the green eyed monster... and, the Internet isn't very helpful. Or maybe its fine. After all, I kind of feel happy for all my friends who are getting married, even if they are marrying ugly guys. Maybe my weird, humorous, and not exactly generous thoughts are just passing observations. So, I promise not to tell you who is who.

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Kansas is about all it's crack up to be. I was driving down the turnpike and the first I see (besides soul crushing empty farmland) is a dead possum on the side of the road. I saw a lot of other things beside the road, too: dead raccoon, dead armadillo, dead corn. Seriously, there was just a piece of corn on the side of the highway. I was like "Kansas, how stereotypical can you get?" And what about all the rest of them, It's like they all got to Kansas and decided "well, there's nothing better to do" *Squlork!* It wasn't too long ago that we were in frontier days. They had all these raccoon pelts and we asked them, we said "Where do you get all these?" They said "road kill". Of course we didn't believe them. I believe them now.

Now, in Colorado we drive like jerks. Or at least we drive different from everybody else in the country. It's like "Oh? You want to get in?" Zoooooom "Here's a space BEHIND me!" So, I'm driving in Kansas and I'm trying to slip behind this truck and the guy stops in the middle of the road and is like "WHAT?!" I wave at him. I turn. I feel like I'm breaking the rules. Like there is a glitch in the game. I'm like "Whoa! This is really civilized. I thought driving was supposed to be like Frogger." "Here's a space! Now gun it for your life!"

Not that driving is all roses. We were getting directions from this woman in Emporia. It was the oldest bar and grill in town, a great place. You'll know it because it looks like you're walking into a shipping container.

Anyway, so she was telling us that we should take the turnpike back. She said that she never would drive through Kansas City. There is just too much traffic, and of course with us leaving when we were, we'd hit rush hour. Rush hour? Traffic? It was SATURDAY in KANSAS!

Turns out we should have listened to her. I mean, just because the part of Kansas City that is in Kansas is something that you'd blink and miss doesn't mean that it isn't the WORST city in the entire world. I swear the thing was designed by Daedalus. For those of you who don't know who that is, the last thing he designed had a minotaur at the center? It was such a mess, he had to build himself wings to get out of the thing. And his son? "Didn't I tell you to not fly so close to-" *sizzle*.

Anyway, even when you're car has a dashboard compass, that doesn't mean that you have ANY IDEA where you're going. Now, I know a lot of you have smartphones. Everyone has smartphones these days. My phone is smart, too. But you see it's only smart when I've got my sister on the other end of it. I asked her, "I said, can you play SIRI for me?" Now, I wouldn't have asked except I was in a very pretty part of a neighborhood I shouldn't have been in. I knew that because all the folks kept giving me the death stare. You know the one, the "you folks shouldn't be in these parts" death stare. So, I'm on the phone trying to write these instructions on my iPod in my little white rental and my Anne Taylor shirt waving at them, trying to give a look like "I'm trying!"

I didn't get very far. So, I called my sister back and she was very patient with me. She tells me to stay on the line and she'll talk me in. So, now she really playing SIRI. I am careening over the Kansas City highway system and she's telling me "turn around when possible." I'm zipping down the highway at 55 miles per hour (when everyone else is going 70) and I'm yelling "IT ISN'T POSSIBLE!" and she's like "Hey, don't get mad at me!" ... Bet your GPS doesn't do that. Your GPS isn't even smart enough to KNOW that you are swearing a blue streak up and down the highway. It just goes on saying, "recalculating, recalculating." And you're all "Think FASTER YOU @#$#@!#%%$#!" That's exactly what you say. Because that's what a blue streak is. You get on the highway and you start spitting out exclamation points and pound signs. You even spit out of a few "at"s just so you know where you are!

So bless her soul, she finally got me to a place where I could find my way and she could get on with the rest of her life. I finally get into the Super 8 parking lot and I call them back. "Hello! So terribly sorry for the trouble." "I know I must have sounded like such a loon. Oh my. So terribly sorry. Thank you so much for helping me though. You are such dears. Enjoy your day."

I think I'm going to get a smartphone when I get back.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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So, I've mucking around on UStream. I have figured out how to stream video from my iPod to my computer. THAT means that I can tape my iPod to the wall (or to the baby gate) and check in on him during the day! It's really cool. I was playing with it on three different computers today and I had a lag in triplicate. It was like I was speaking to myself from a few seconds before. Talk about a time traveling brain game there.

Maybe that's why you wouldn't be able to visit yourself as you time traveled. Anything you said or did would be so magnified like the sound from multiple speakers making it so bad that it either broke the system or became unbearable to withstand. I'll probably use that in a sci-fi novel someday.

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My current runner-ups are:

Jasper
Skittles
Story

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So, I saw the puppies this weekend (horrah!) It was so nice to be surrounded by a whole little of puppies all at once. There was one little guy I really fell in love with (naturally) so we'll see if that ends up being mine. I have two more weeks to wait! Which means that I am going to Kansas, finishing a website and finish a group project all in that time. I am... D-: !!

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