its actually quite a funny story.

but anyways...my weekend was good. Friday i worked 5-10. It was a friggin awesome nite at work. Best I've ever had i dare say. it was sooo dead and there was so many exta people. we got pizza and stuff from dominos and were eating and chilling and talking about drive bys and stuff. lol...and I was singing a song and rolling around on the ground.

saturday, work was okay. I was physced up to see Justin saturday. we chilled and went to the mall and then to chinese. it was fun...

sunday, i worked...then went home and what i did after that is a secret. ;-) haha jus playing

today I was soooooo tired and sooooo grumpy. I jus wanted to go to bed sooo friggin bad all day. I wasnt really paying too much attention in class...I was kinda zoned out, thinkin bout things.

tonite i worked till 9...then I came home. Justin and I talked and ended up actually breaking up...which isn't a bad thing cause we're still gonna be friends...better friends then ever. and I know that its the right thing to do. I love him so much but sometimes, a relationship needs more. and we'll work on that.

anyways, Im exhausted. its time for bed maybe...

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thats so how I feel. and I feel like crying. I have no idea. Well, maybe I do. I feel like my energy...my persistance...it's being wasted. I feel like I'm never gonna be good enough for him, like no matter what I do...it doesn't matter. He's still gonna look at me as the girl who cheated on him three times. The girl he can never trust again. So tell me, is there really any sense in me trying so hard to be with someone I love if he's pretty much dooming the relationship?! No, theres not. But Im jus gonna hang in there and pretend like...HEY EVERYTHING IS EFFIN GREAT. I EFFIN LOVE LIFE. No, I don't. Blah...

on to better news...

this week has been okay. got report cards...its as follows:
factual writing - 95
world cultures - 90
ecology - 93
algebra two - 96

wednesday I went and saw Justin. god I love him, but god hes killing me.

work has been okay...
...but I dont think I've ever been more broke in my life then I am at the moment which is actually quite funny seeing as I never buy anything except gas. haha...

I've been thinking about Allie alot. I really miss her. I wanna go see her but, I don't know what to say...what to do. It kinda sucks. This monday will be 3 years since Ash died. Its crazy. time is flying by...everythings changing so fast. I HATE this. I hate growing up.

...someday things will be okay.

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the only way it coulda been any better is if i coulda hung out with my boy but thats okay.

Friday nite, me and kym and sara went to charlies to eat and play some pool. Shawn Gowin was there so we played some pool and hung out. It was fun. I got my salad that I always get there, and played my shania twain. haha...and I so totally beat shawn at pool. what can I say, I got skillls. okay im lying, he beat me but ooh well.

then we headed to the game where Troy proceeded to KILL Canton and keep the shoe. I kinda wanted Canton to win cause Justin goes there etc, but...I knew Troy was going to. It was okay though. I chilled with Justins parents most of the game and walked around and talked to people.

after the game was over, i went and talked to Justin. He was grouchy but then he kinda cooled down somewhat. I thought he was mad at me but, I dunno...I guess I was overanalyzing things...again. How can I not though...Im so worried that Im going to screw up or hes mad about something. I want things to be perfect again.

after the game, we went home and then my parents took me and kym to her house where I proceeded to pass out in her bed.

saturday I worked 6-2. after work, we went back to kyms place and chilled and got showers...then me kym and donnie went to the mall and to get chinese. It was good food. haha...got some new stuff and then ben was at the mall with his...female friend. Haha...ben starts beating up on me in the mall. So friggin mean. =p after that, we went back to kyms and I fell asleep and then kym and donnie went to rent the notebook and came back and watched that and then they woke me up and I talked to my baby for a bit, then passed out again. I was soooooo tired. kym and donnie took a pic of me sleeping with my mouth all open and stuff on donnies phone. mm, attractive. ;-) haha eww

sundayyyyyyy...well, i worked 6-2 today and it wasnt too bad surprisingly. after work, donnie and ben picked us up and I went back to kyms and we jus chilled for like...half an hr before my uncle picked me up.

then I came home

and now im going to goooooo

byeeeeeeee

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My life? It's going great. This week we've had AMAZING weather. It makes me soo happy. I love nice weather.

Monday, I didn't have to work or anything so I jus chilled at home after school was out. It was so nice Monday morning, and I was jus in a superb mood. School was okay...I got my one paper back, and I received a D. a FRIGGIN D. Yes, I was sooo upset about that. It ruined my dayyyyyy. Fortunuately, Mrs. Chimics let me re-do it and guess what I got? GUESS? A ONE HUNDRED PERCENT! WOOT WOOT.

Tuesday, I worked after school. Blah, it was kinda sucky. I am getting to the point where i hate my job. I dunno...jus the people. I love Lisa though and her big baby belly. AWW =) Precious. I love wrapping my arm around her and rubbing her belly. its great.

Wednesday was also very good. nice weather, etc. We had a party last pd for the end of the quater. It sucks not having that class. I liked it alot. I love my ikka and my kayla time. =) aww well though...after school I went to elmira and then down to canton to chill with Mr. Mood. I was happpy happy to see him...but, I think he was pretty happy to see me too. =p Hehe...I love him so much, we're back together. I hope he realizes that i'm not gonna screw with him this time...etc. If you dunno what I'm talkin bout, you're pry not supposed to. So anyways, we're back together and Im sooooo glad.

Today was blah. The weather was great and that had me in a good mood but, I'm jus...blah today. I got my factual writing paper back - the one I BS'd. I got a B so that's good. =) We changed classes and now I have...gym. It's going to be a long 9 weeks, cause I cant stand bout...90% of my class. I guess we'll see.

Tomorrow is the old shoe game. woot woot, whose EXCITED? ;-) Troy is soo gonna kick Canton's butt but, it's okay. Im not gonna get cocky about it. ;-)

Anyways, I'm out. Working sat and sun 6-2. I'll be in elmira, so hit up the cell.

I LOVE YOU BABAYYYY

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Friday night after school, I came home and then got around for Kym's pronto. I went and got my check and cashed it...then went to Kym's and hung out for a bit. We decided to go to Applebee's for dinner and we went and met Sara and then headed up there.

Omg...I was driving reallly bad Friday night. I dunno why...I jus...wasn't driving good. It SCARED me. Lol...my parking sucks too, but aw well.

On the way up, we stopped and got gas and Andy was working. haha...it was pretty amusing cause his boss or whatever is like...Indian. I dunno how he understands her.

Anyways, my food was amazing...and so was Kym's. Sara's was okay...not GREAT but okay.

After dinner, we went to the mall and wanted to see Saw 2 but yano...being as its rated R and they give you all this crap about it, we didn't. We ended up buying some clothes and stuff...then headed back to her house.

I talked to Justin for a little bit, then Andy called and we argued some, and then I went to bed.

Saturday I worked 6-2. It was actually a good day at work. I didn't get mad or anything. =) It was good.

After work, we went back to Kym's and chilled around. She was on the phone with her lovely boyfriend most of the evening. Haha...I fell asleep for a few minutes...then I got on the computer and hung out, then we decided to go get something to eat.

So we went to pudgies and got chicken wing pizza cause hey, thats the best chicken wing pizza ever. Then we went to tops, and then went back to her house.

I just chilled around while Kym was on the phone with Donnie, then Andy called me and I heard he had said something about me that wasn't cool so I definitely was on his...butt about it. I yelled at him sooo bad. I feel bad kinda but, he deserves it. What he said/did was really mean so screw him I guess. He needs to striaghten himself up or else he's going to be one lonely boy forever.

then I went to bed...a certain guy kinda bummed me out but oh well, I need to get over things.

Went to bed around 11 and then got up at 5:30 for work. Went to work...worst day ever almost. I hate working Sundays cause every sunday, Nicole puts me as presentor with no order taker and I get sooo mad. I mean, I get really mad. I won't even get into in though cause I know people read this.

Anyways, I got really crappy hours this week but I kinda don't mind cause I need time to relax a bit. I was soo exhausted from working all last week. And I need time to think and jus...do my own thing I guess.

Tuesday 5-9
Sat 6-2
Sun 6-2

I'm out...peace=p

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Here's how life is going for me.

Tuesday, I traded hours with Cora so I could go see Justin...and guess what? IT SNOWED. I was so mad and it was the only day I had off so I went and saw Justin anyways. =) It was scary...it was my first time driving in the snow. scarrry...but I made it all the way down and back with out any...problems. Justin kinda made me sad but...that's okay bc I guess I deserve it and Im hoping if I wait things out, they will get better.

Monday and Wed I worked. Work sucks but ooh well. Its money and thats whats important to me. I had to work last nite too...but not till 6:15 so I went and talked to Andy for a bit. That didn't go well but, I said what I needed to say. :-/ Sometimes, I wonder if I'm doing the right thing...but, my hearts saying it is so...go with it I guess. =)

tonight, I'm not working. Sara, me and kym might go out to eat...maybe olive garden? and maybe see saw 2 cause I wanna see it. Not really sure whats going on yet. working 6-2 sat and sunday. That bites cause I wont get to see Justin at all...but hey, I know things are going to be hard but I'm not giving up without a fight. =)

anyways, time to go do some work...

BYEEEEEEEEE

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