When I do get around to actually watching TV, there are only certain things I like. I say this because I can have a TV on almost constantly and with all the channels find something to fill the dead air around me. Usually this will be sports or something on the History/various Discovery Networks.

This is not what I speak of when referring to "appointment television". These are the shows that I actually set up TiVo recordings for. I'm writing this, to see if anybody can agree with me on these shows, and I trust some of you folks have the same taste as me in primetime entertainment, this will be done in a top 10 style of not exactly the best shows on TV, but I guess it could be construed as my favorites at the moment (also, this includes only sitcoms):

10. The League (FX Thursdays at 10:30 -currently out of season-)

In a word, amazing. As an avid fantasy football player (League Champion this year, kiss my ring), this show just gets me. It is a strangely accurate insight into the often delusional minds of the fantasy fanatics.

9. Archer (FX Thursdays at 10)

Unbelievable. This show, if you haven't seen it, is from Adam Reed, one half of the team behind Sealab 2021 and Frisky Dingo, two of my favorite shows on Adult Swim, and it's about time that this found it's way to more mainstream TV. The show follows the International Secret Intelligence Service or ISIS, and centers around the spoiled Id-driven son of the director of ISIS, and deadliest spy in the world Sterling "Dutchess" Archer. This may be the ballsiest cartoon I've ever seen, not afraid to say anything.

8. Better Off Ted (ABC Tuesdays at 9:30)

This absurd show focuses on Veridian, a company who cares about it's public image and not much else. The titular character, Ted, is upper-middle management and has a bit too much of a conscience. Some of the funniest things I have heard in years were spawned from the conversations between Ted and his boss Veronica, a soulless corporate narcissist. That's all you're getting, Hulu it, kids.

7. Psych (USA Wednesday at 10 EST)

This one has had me since the beginning, and I have to admit it did catch me off guard. I did not really trust USA to produce a quality television program (I never got into Monk), however, this story of an overly observant slacker turned fake psychic detective is beyond hilarious, and realizes just how ridiculous it's concept is, as it constantly takes shots at itself and it's competitors (The Mentalist, for instance).

6. The Venture Brothers (Cartoon Network- Adult Swim Sundays at Midnight -currently out of season-)

A delightful parody of the old Johnny Quest cartoons and the like. If you have never witnessed the glory that is this show, I pity you. It is just a smart as it is absurd, and it is definitely worth a shot from anybody who has ever heard the term "boy adventurer".

5. South Park (Comedy Central Wednesday at 10)

Respect. As of late, the show has been slipping, but I still can't resist making sure I see all of the episodes, because with South Park you never known when something will happen that becomes a pop culture sensation, you also never know when something is going to happen that just makes your jaw hit the floor and begs you to ask "did they really just put that on TV?"

4. 30 Rock (NBC Thursdays at 9:30)

Another one that seems to be running out of steam every now and then, but this multiple Emmy award winner that is a look inside the inner workings of an absurd version of it's host network, NBC. Alec Baldwin has been fantastic on this show since it's inception, Tina Fey is very possibly the funniest woman alive, and the ensemble surrounding them is out of this world.

3. Modern Family (ABC Wednesdays at 9:00)

My brother insisted I watch this show for about five weeks before I finally gave it a shot, and I regret taking that long. This could easily be number 1 on this list eventually. It is one of the few shows that week in, week out delivers the funny without a doubt. Centering around three parts of the same family, there are the Dunphy's, the most average section featuring the standard late thirties husband and wife (Phil and Claire) with three teenage kids (Luke, Haley, and Alex), Mitchell and Cameron, a gay couple with an adopted Vietnamese daughter (Lily), and then there's Jay, Gloria and Manny. Jay is the patriarch and the father of Mitchell and Claire, Gloria is his wife, straight from Columbia and about thirty years younger, and Manny is Gloria's son, a chubby yet wise way beyond his years eleven year old. Each week we are shown interactions amongst these people, and as I said before, it never lets me down.

2. Community (NBC Thursdays 8:00)

Not enough I can say about this show. I started watching it when it started because I am loyal to Joel McHale from The Soup on E!, I did not expect much but I was hooked after one episode, and it has kept me laughing for all 16 episodes currently aired. Based around an eclectic group of community college students who bond through shared ridiculous experiences. Chevy Chase returns to being funny, Donald Glover is a breakout star (if you've ever seen Derrick Comedy videos, you'll recognize him), and Joel McHale keeps it all together. Watch this show.

1. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX Thursdays10:00 -Currently out of season-)

The ballsiest non-cartoon show on TV. The line "It's Seinfeld on crack" does not do the debauchery of this show justice. Focusing on the five "worst people on the face of the planet", who just so happen to be a bunch of low-life friends who own a rather unsuccessful bar in Philadelphia. This show is fun just to watch how each week the characters start off with a reasonable goal to attain, and over the next 22 minutes find a way to flush that goal into the crapper by their own idiotic devices. Very, very, very, very funny. However, is not on often enough as it only airs September to early December. But if you tune in to this show, I can almost guarantee (unless you're a bit sensitive) that you'll come away with at least a laugh or five.

Anyway, like I said, I did this to see if you people agree with my choices in comedy, some shows that I enjoy but don't quite see every episode of when they come on are:

The Office
Family Guy
The Simpsons

Feed my curiosity!

Yours in professionalism,
Dorms

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Here's something that makes me feel alive:

Drinking heavily then having time alone with the internet or my phone. Because I pass out, and then the next morning is always hilarious. Because typically I wake up in a cold sweat not knowing if I did anything that I probably should have. So I take a shower, nervous the whole time, and then run down to the computer and immediately assess the situation, who did I comment on yesterday, what does my status say? Is it anything overly revealing? Did I learn a secret and then immediately pass it on? Did I do something unbelievably stupid?

Well today kids, it was none of the above, but I sure was panicked.

Yours in professionalism,
Dorms

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Bahaha, see what I did there?

No but honestly, thanks for rushing to the rescue on that one.

The point however, was that I understand the friendly tone behind the phrase, but I'm just so messed up and jaded, still, that I can't hear the phrase unexpectedly without immediately thinking some sort of game is being played with my head. Is that self-centered? Yes. But it's just the way things are anymore.

And I hate it, but it's what I do, I overthink everything, sometimes it is incredibly useful, most of the time it ends up getting me into trouble. We'll see what happens.

Yours in Professionalism,
Dorms

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How did I get so jaded?

A girl who is amazing for me drunkenly and rather friendly-esque dropped the "I love you" on me... and I had no idea how to react to that.

I instantly started analyzing what kind of game was on here... thankfully this was on the facebook so my ridiculousness wouldn't be seen... but it got me to thinking, my latest romantic trauma was four years ago... and yet still I am so untrusting... does anybody have some tips here? Because I feel like I'm being utterly ridiculous as to the point where I have to analyze any mention of the words "I love you" without being able to respond.

-Love,
Chris

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FEED ME A STRAY CAT

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It's me... I'm the great taste that won't do those things...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANYWAY, whatup, NuTang? How's it been? How's your mum?

I've always heard when you have difficult news you should lead with a joke, so.... it may be in bad taste, but here we go:

A man is on his daily walk, he's been doing this every day for fifteen years, it is a scenic walk, as he passes a lake on the way. Well this particular day as he walks by the lake he sees a young woman, around 20, by the lake in a wheelchair. He hears her crying, and being a decent human being wants to make sure that she's alright. He gets there and asks:

"are you alright?"
"no..." she responds
"well what's wrong?" the man asks?
"well... I've been in this chair my whole life... and I've never been hugged before."

So, the man, feeling like a good Samaritan gives her a hug, she stops crying and seems genuinely happy. The man leaves, and feels rather good about himself.

The next day, our hero is on his walk, as he passes the lake he sees the same girl, in the same spot. He goes over and asks:

"What's wrong?"
"Well... it's embarrassing... but... I've never been kissed before."

The man, feeling justified, gives the girl a passionate kiss. Right on the mouth. He goes home feeling strange, but glad he could do a favor.

THE NEXT DAY! He's on his walk, sees this girl in the same spot, crying the same tears, in the same wheelchair. He goes over and asks:

"Okay, why are you still crying? I've hugged you, I've kissed you... I mean honestly what else could you possibly want?"

The girl lifts her head, looks him right in the eye and says "I've never been fucked before..."

The man ponders for a few seconds, then picks the girl up out of the wheelchair, takes her down to the edge of the lake, and throws her in... as he is walking away he yells...

"THERE! NOW YOU'RE FUCKED!"

I hope you're laughing, if not, fuck you if you can't take a joke.

But here's the news... I'VE BEEN CHEATING ON YOU!!!!

Yes it's true, as some of you know I love me some sports, but I did not want to pollute my blog here with all sports all the time... so, I decided to start a new blog... if you're interested in sports... check it out

http://dormsintheflat.blogspot.com/

I hope we can still be together... I love you, NuTang...

Also, Zombieland is one of the best movies I've seen in a few year... I am a zombie fanatic, and a bit of a snob... but this movie was really refreshing. So if you haven't seen it... go effing see it.

Alright, that is all for now... lovesies

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