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Personal Conflict
Being human our perception towards change is often one of excitement & hope; but alas we are also innately habitual.
The silent voice in my head
I hate the quiet. The quiet is loud; it resonates the many voices living in my head.
on life
If growing up means giving up childish ways; forever a child then I will remain!
on love
Do you think I would let something as dull, as you trying to kill me stop me from loving you?
Satiety (Sa*ti"e*ty)
The state of being satiated or glutted; fullness of gratification, either of the appetite or of any sensual desire; fullness beyond desire; an excess of gratification which excites wearisomeness or loathing; repletion; satiation. "In all pleasures there is satiety." Hakewill. "But thy words, with grace divine Imbued, bring to their sweetness no satiety." Milton. Synonyms -- Repletion; satiation; surfeit; cloyment.
Man
The uniqueness of the human spirit lies in our ability to heal. And a mended spirit often soars beyond the reach of a spirit untouched.
Life
We all need to express ourselves. Even when there is no one around.
When shadows leave and you remain!
Wednesday. 3.29.06 10:38 am


Deceit......

Do you really want to see; see what's inside of me?
Are you O so ready to bear; the burdens, I care too much to share?

Do you really want to see; what's dying inside of me?
Oh I know the blood flows; it is my blood so I ought to know!

Do you really want to see; what I fear will never be?
For though my eyes are stained brown, they have gazed at eyes so unrenowned!

Do you really want to see; see what I know I can be?
True, actions stand on vast ground, but it is thought; that is renowned.

WHY is it you do not see?
See that the shadows didn't go... I chose not to leave.

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All this I made
Friday. 3.3.06 7:51 am
There are so few.
Grow up! He said whilst looking into nothingness.
I stood there staring at the floor; the carpet was a faded blue. It might have once been vivid blue, but now; now only a suggestion.
I heard him. Every word. Yet none of it made sense.

One day you will understand that I am grown up.
For I am so ready! So ready for it all to end.
For doesn't seeing the end mark the nearing of the finish.

I love you he said. If only you would see.
All this I made; I made for you.

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cold water and the only salad i eat
Monday. 2.20.06 12:23 pm
You know I'm talking about you.
I give up!
I can't anymore.
I'm sobering up; giving up the habit!
There was no high like you,
But the hangovers are outweighing the highs.
You asked me not to breathe in but I did.

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my i hate you love song
Wednesday. 2.8.06 1:51 am

Every once in a while you find you're once in a lifetime
And all at once things don't seem so clear.
You up on that stage left me quiet in a long time
Arms folded tight to out stretched hand

So hey this is my I hate you love song
So please just disregard me
I hope u don't mind me shouting that I love u
It's just right now really hard for me
To set you free from this heart that hopes u love me.

You took away walls I put up for longtime
You brought back parts of me didn't want to see
As I fell you say it's only that one time
You're interest change so easily....

So hey this is my I hate you love song
So please just disregard me
I hope u don't mind me shouting that I love u
It's just right now really hard for me
To set you free from this heart that hopes u love me.

Holding back is ends b4 a beginning
But there I was bare for all to see
As you turn I find myself watching you leaving
But yet your ghost's still haunting me

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I'll hold on
Wednesday. 12.14.05 3:20 pm


Just another story in this screwed up society,
Another life down the drain.
Another classic sucker, direction towards disaster,
But this one's a little strange.

He's shy but his head's up high.
He's smiling though his dreams have died.
And when you ask him why his answer stays the same.

He says I've lived, I've lost, I've loved at great cost.
But what I had was worth all this pain.

I wouldn't give up one moment, not one second.
No I wouldn't change a thing if I could turn back time.
Yes I feel like I'm dying and I'm constantly crying.
But once upon a time I felt like I could fly.

So yes I've lived I've lost, I've loved at great cost.
But what I had was worth all this pain.
So no I wouldn't give it up, no I'll never say enough.
And though I don't believe things will change... I'll hold on.

I bet your probably wondering if our boy got some sense knocked in him.
But I'll have to say things didn't really change.
The last time I saw him he was carrying his daughter I think Annabelle was her name.

He stood there with his head up high like all his dreams were flying high. And when I asked him why his answered was the same.

He said I've lived, I've lost, I've loved at great cost.
But what I had was worth all this pain.
So no I wouldn't give it up, no I'll never say enough.
But now I believe things will change... so I'll hold on.


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jolly's lolly
Wednesday. 11.16.05 12:24 am
Jolly had a lolly that was a sight to behold.
He held it up proudly as he went for a stroll.
He enjoyed the gawking stares from the people he passed.
He imagined the context of the whispering and laughed.

Jolly's lolly was red, white and blue.
from many an angle it resembled a canoe.
He walked with his lolly all the way to city square.
there he found a seat on a startegicly placed chair.

as he sat down and prepared to take his first lick.
Jolly's nose felt a sudden itch.
next came an AHHHH then a CHOOOO
and that was the end, for Jolly's lolly flew.

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