So, I'm in the waiting room right now...

Thank God for labtops, no? At least my dad, for mine.

I had forgotten how beautiful it is up here. Man! It really makes me hate Texas all over again... *throws tiny texas flag to the floor* Well, maybe not hate, per se, but I definitely miss everything up here; the trees, the farms, the accents, the pies!, EVERYTHING.

So, I've honestly been really worried.
Not semi-worried, but SERIOUSLY worried and nervous and concerned and whatever other synonyms you can add to that.
I haven't really shared that with anyone, because, well..., that's just how I am when it comes to my mom and stuff like this.

However

On the plane ride up here there was this girl that set in the window seat, so I sat next to her, with my mom in the aisle seat. She said "hi" when I was sitting down and pulled out a magazine to read. I thought she was around 14. When I got situated I looked over and noticed that the magazine she had was a Smallville magazine. We got to talking from there. Apparently Smallville and Roswell were her two favorite shows, she was a junior in highschool, and had gone to Plano, Texas to visit her cousin. She seemed pretty cool.

Last night as I lay there, trying to go to sleep after having prayed with my mom and dad, I thought and thought. Then I thought about how I shouldn't think. I remembered Pastor Lo along with so many other people telling me to think positive...

I burst out laughing.

My parents on the other bed asked me why I was laughing.

I told them what happened.

You see, not too long ago I had a conversation with Helena over flying. She mentioned how even though she knew and understood how flying was possible, that planes still weirded her out. How "it's still a giant metal tube flying in the air". So, as I rode on the plane I realized how right she actually was. And began to fear just a little. Not long after, the girl who I spoke with in the window seat, looked away from the window and back at me as we were nearing landing and said,
"You ever wonder how many people in here are imagining the plane catching fire and exploding or something?"
Panic struck me. I said,
"I don't think anyone really tries to think of that. I think everyone likes to keep thinking positively. ...like Peter Pan. As long as we have our 'happy thoughts', we'll keep flying." She giggled.

I laughed at the memory of that.

Of course!

It doesn't really matter what we think.
At the end of the flight what matter is the plane, physics, and the pilots.



So, I came to understand what trusting God is like...

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We leave tomorrow morning. REALLY early tomorrow morning.
My mom's already packed and everything, quite contrary to me.

Today at church they prayed for us. It was pretty cool, I guess.

I've been sick, though, and it's making me quite upset. I don't need this right now. I have hardly any energy. And I need a haircut. Bad. Seriously. But my mom wants me to wait until we get up to Minnesota.
And the fact that we leave tomorrow means I'm saving all my nice clothes for the trip there. So because of all of this, I look like general crap today.

After church I took most of the youth to get a burger, than home. I didn't eat where they ate, since it looked to greasy, but that's what they wanted.
I ended up going to a chinese restaraunt with Paul, one of my youth, and Helena. The food didn't sit well with me, so I felt even worse, and probably looked even worse.
Paul really wanted to see Pirates of the Caribbean 3 and I was willing to see it again, just because it's him. He's cool. So, we bought our tickets and walked around the mall for a little bit.

As the song that I currently have up, played in the background, Helena, Paul, and I walked through the mall. I kept my eyes down most of the time. (There were alot of people). I'd glance up once in a while.
Glance up - random people.
Look back down. Stay down.
Glance up - random people.
Look back down. Stay down.
Glance up - random people.
Look back down. Stay down.
Glance up - her parents.
Look back down, wait-what?
Look up - raise hand in a general akward/ashamed gesture which signified "hello".
The mom returns it - the dad looks away.
And I stare back down at the floor and walk past them.
A minute or so later I looked over at Helena. She's looking over the rail at the carousel. She had no clue. ...like usual.


We arrived late to the movie.
We exchanged the tickets and returned mine. I went home and they went to the 7 o'clock showing.

My stomach couldn't stomach it.

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