You know what would be awesome? If one night, you're just lying in bed and you hear thumps on your window. Slowly and hesitantly, you get out of bed, look outside and see that it was your guy standing outside throwing rocks at your window.

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mood: frustrated

There are some people that i just can't read. One day there're this way, and the next day, there're that way...grrrr...its so frustrating. I'm so tired of it, i don't want to play this guessing game anymore. i don't feel like talking to them anymore either. Ahhh, why can't they just be straightforward?

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I've always known that i'm a really shy and passive person, but today i realized that i'm even more shy than i thought i was. I start blushing just talking to regular friends sometimes. I don't know... i don't think i would change the way i am (i don't think i could even if i wanted to) because its just the way i am. I'm just different from everybody else.

It was so wierd because in american lit., Mrs. Talbert was describing a character in The Jungle and it sounded totally like me.

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mood: smitten
I have this friend, whom i always thought was just a friend, but today i looked at him, and started to giggle....could it be??? (edie thats why i was giggling)

I'm really sorry guyz for being so fickle about the whole moving deal. I swear that i'm not moving to California, just as long as i get into Chapel Hill. If i don't get into UNC, then i'm moving to Cali for school cuz theres no other school in NC that i like. And once agian, i swear this is the last time i'm changing this whole deal. Sooo....if you want me to stay, please encourage to to do good in school so i can get into UNC! And whatever plans we had before this little interuption, lets continue them.

i just got a great idea for edie's campaine, lyceum discounts on cookies from the cafeteria. Lyceum voters are a good target because most of them are voting for ted. IDK, just an idea. (by the way, the cookies aren't that great to me)

Today was interesting, i sat in french for just 10 secs until Jess came and wisked me away. We went downtown to the Trolly stop and jess asked the guy there if he's had n e up dog lately. He had no clue, i thought it was hilarious since it was inside a hot dog place. After that, we just sat on the riverfront and talked about our plans we're doing since i'm not moving n e more. It was a great, i'm glad i didn't waste my time sitting in french.

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I feel so alone. Everything is infesting in this web of interwined worries and fears and my mind is the center of it all. Faster and faster its spinning and wrapping its way up around me...consuming me...suffocating me. I can't breathe.

Would i cry forever, if my tears could wash away my despair?

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mood: every synonym of tired

Ok, i'm going to admit that i don't really like either Hugh or Jordan. I just wanted to see how Edie would react to me likeing the same guys she did. umm. sorta like April Fools, but not really. Well n e wayz....yea...i don't have any attraction at all to them, i swear...really...you have to beleive me.

*big SIGH* I'm really dreading the two hour days. I hate being in calculus with nobody to talk to. Its torture!

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