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theZEBRA
just spent the weekend at the army barracks
Is Chewing On
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Creation
Gore Vidal

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Everything in Transit
Jack's Mannequin
Lick Those Stripes!
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Songs of the Plains
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One would be in less danger
From the wiles of a stranger
If one's own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with.

Ogden Nash
Conversations in the Key of Mom III
Sunday. 3.11.07 11:49 am
Me: (In reference to a picture someone sent me) That's got to be the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me.*

Mom: Cough cough.

Me: Geez...alright, the sweetest thing anyone's ever done is giving birth to me.

Mom: And what a mistake that turned out to be.

*Alright, maybe not the sweetest thing ever. But it was still pretty damn sweet.

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Conversations in the Key of Mom IV
Saturday. 4.7.07 2:44 pm
Mom: Anyway, he is an Aries like me. So he should be a very nice and big hearted person. Always getting bullied.

Me: What are you talking about?! You never get bullied! You're the one always bullying ME! You pulled my pyjama pants down and wrote on my bum while I was asleep!

Mom: And hit you with a mobile phone? Jamie, these are endearing streaks of mine. No other mums will do such things. You are very fortunate.

Me: It's called ABUSE!

Mom: I CALL IT LUVVVVV. HAHAHAHA!

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Conversations in the Key of Mom IV
Sunday. 9.16.07 5:32 pm
I just learnt that my mother was actually in Jakarta at the time of the earthquake that occurred close to it last month. The earthquake had a magnitude of 7.5 so it was a little frightening to hear that. Looking back on our conversation, I can say with utter conviction that it’s best to absolutely forget about depending on her in times of emergency.

Describing her initial reaction to the shaking building

Mom: I could hear horrible creaking and I felt the whole building sway. And when I looked out the window, things were moving in and out of view at its edges. After about half a minute of this, I thought that I had better do something. So I called the reception desk.

Me: What?! Why didn’t you evacuate the building immediately?!

Mom: Oh, that would’ve been a little drastic, don’t you think?

On how she finally escaped to safety

Mom: So I walked out of the room and headed to the lifts.

Me: That’s dangerous! You were supposed to take the stairs!!

Mom: I did think about that. But with 16 floors between me and the ground, I decided that I would rather die comfortable in a lift than in a stairwell.

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