just got back from swimmin w/ ma homie ana, luv that kid, awesome. i hate it though, she thinks shes soooo fat and shes on a diet and i just think its sorta unfair that i can eat 6 pieces of pizza and still be starving and she eats that and gains like two pounds.... i will say that shes not the skinniest person i met, but shes not FAT shes just like big boned, and stuff, shes short, and im tall with lOOOOOng legs, lol. i showed her a pic of josh, she laughed. and then i said, well ur in love w/ this guy named skandar keenes or something and hes about as cute as a bucket. and then shes like, well brianna likes him too! and im like, well ya but brianna went out with possibly the ugliest kid in school besides connor. and shes like, well.... ya..... u make a strong point.... ha id make a great lawyer, lol or debater or something.... w/e..... if ya like chris brown's song "gimme that", then shout for joy cuz ive found 20 ppl that love that song, its awesome... ya, hes still not home.... god........ oh well, thaz alrite...... i actually plan to keep this relationship, hes mi homie..... i dont wanna lose him... .... this is wat i think of roxanne rite now... shes the one w/ the bomb in the mouth.. lol. it sucked, ana had to leave early cuz her gramps couldnt wait another 45 min... damn... it was pretty hilarious cuz ana lost her gum in the pool somewhere... thats pretty gross... lol.... we're plannin on goin to ca adventures soon cuz we wanna go on hollywood tower of terror... god i <3 that ride... lol, kk, im gonna go and wait some more 4 him to sign on... lol, jkjk

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well.... im back again, just went shopping at kohls and mervyns...... yaya.... got a swimsuit for hawaii which is pretty cool. its brown... and i got some pjs pants...... but i dont get it cuz when am i going to wear pants for pjs cuz its like 80 degrees at nite and no better at hawaii.... *sigh* this sux... hes coming back today so im hoping i'll get to talk to him... i think he called cuz i had a message on mi phone (cell) and it was a 714 phone # that wasnt like 444-1010 or something, it was something normal lol if that makes any sense..... lol....... poor kid... oh well.... ya... if u like panic at the disco, comment! im listening to time to dance right now, awesome song... lol. sory about the retarded title, lol, its a camp/volunteering song that josh and rita and karly and divya and me all loved to sing cuz of its gory end. lol first the bee stings u, then u squash it, then u feel bad so u sew it up and let it fly away.... supposing it will still fly... lol, awesome song.... pretty bored.... ok, im gonna go and eat a burrito now... i swear... i could live off of mexican food, mad props to spanish ppl! lol, awesome, kkkkk bibi....

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wow, i've finally returned after about 2 years of silence... its all good though cuz ive got SOOOOOOO much to say!!!!!! yes its a guy, but why does that matter? lol, ok wel this will be a long entry but its interesting so dont stop here!!! ok, two weeks ago i started volunteering (again...) at ocnc at a summer day camp for little kids.... some days i wished it was an overnight camp, ok, so on the first day, everyone pretty much kept to themselves and crap. on the second day is wen the magic started. i went to this one station with a group of kids and he was working at the station. Apparently, the activity at the station was a loooooong hike so ya. im a pretty reserved person so of course, i didnt say hi first. i went to the back of the line of kids and thats wen josh (yes thats his name) came over. "i guess ill just hang out w/ u back here!" ya hes a total and complete hottie, but thats besides the point, lol so inside mi head i was like, "he CANT be talking to me!" and then it turned out he was, so we hung out THE WHOLE hike (yes it was one hour of sheer happiness for me) and then of course halfway through the hike i was talking about how i was going shoppin for some new shoes after volunteering and then! "im soo happy! mi GF (GF, GF GF GF GF GF!) HATES shopping!" that just about tore mi heart in two, but i didnt show it. i just figured, ok, we can just be friends! awesome! no pressure! but of course that didnt stop me from liking him :). the next day (wednesday now) was water day for the kids where they got each other soaked. that was our bonding day basically, we hung out the ENTIRE day, ate lunch together, and of course got each other soaked, good stuff! and HE WAS WEARING A WHITE TSHIRT!!!! AND HE HAS A SIX PACK!!!! HOLY F***!!!!! , ya that was a pretty good sight! lucky me, i wore a dark green tshirt, i was saved from utter embarrasment while mi friend wore a pink bra and white tshirt. i was like, "HOW COULD U BE SO STUPID?!" and then thursday.... wow... thursday! that was complete heaven for me!!!! AAAH! it was the lunch hike day where everyone went to eat lunch at this smalll stream in the canyon, its about a 45 minute hike. josh and i were standing alone, waiting for the kids to pass and we saw everyone pairing up, he says to me, "wanna be mi buddy " i laugh and say, "*laughs* yeah sure!" inside mi head, fireworks were going off! and some weird ppl were singing alleluia too... so we hang out the whole hike and i can tell, he really wants to hug me, despite the gf thing, being mi conservative self, i didnt hug him, i deeply regret it now.... so then pangs of jealousy and hurt sting mi heart as he talks about his gf. but im nice so i just kept on thinking, "ok thats nice. u deserve her, its cool, i can stop liking u." and i do, and then its all best friends down the road. friday, nothing special. monday, we laugh constantly about the ringer, GO AND SEE THAT MOVIE ITS ABOUT THE EFFIN FUNNIEST THING U'LL SEE! tuesday, we hang out during the hike again and he shows me how to pitch a ball (hes a pitcher, awesome muscles ) and of course, i suck, but then i tell him how well i swim, and he stops thinking im not athletic... well okay, im really not athletic, i can only swim and sorta run :) lol. wednesday, water day, got each other soaked, him wearin a white tshirt again, i think on purpsoe, lol. thrusday.... wow.... here we go... okay, theres this girl at the camp whos name is nikki and shes a leader of a group (she works there) and she goes to canyon, WAY out of joshs league. if u see josh, hes either w/ me or nikki. so one day, me and karly see josh, sorta flirting w/ nikki. me and karly r like, wow, playa! wait a minute, we know which lunch bag is his! lets go and write "I <3 Nikki!" all over it! its decided and we do it. he discovers it at the lunch hike and we laugh about it, then it turns ugly. me and josh go to sit w/ nikki erin and nicole. we eat lunch and he says "i really want to get the volunteer of the week award" and then nikki, erin, and nicole say (not at the same time of course they just agree to it) that the only reason that he wont get it is that he flirts w/ everybody... i cant help but feel VERY mad at them. josh doesnt flirt w/ everyone, he has a gf that he REALLY cares about, i wont go into detail about that, he just always talks to me aboout her. so he falls silent and im thinking "oh gr8 thanks a lot guys...." so i talk to him and try and cheer him up and it works, he starts talking to me and says, "ya... those things kinda hit home w/ me... im sorry, its fine, really u didnt say it, or agree w/ it, so ur cool" and we start laughing. then PERFECT TIMING of course, karly and rita and emily come over and start taunting josh about everything. and ya, i stop them saying, "guys, can u not tease him about it? please?" and they're like, "ooh.. umm... yeah sure.. sory josh" then josh gives me a smile, awesoem aint it.... lol, but remember i dont like him anymore... so friday comes and thats pretty cool cuz i think he has mixed emotions about me, sorta likes me, sorta just a friend type thing. some ppl think we're together, and stuff like that, let them think wat they wanna think, he's just a friend! so that day there was face paintin for the lil kids and erin says to josh, "come here, lemme paint ur face" and hes like, nooo i only trust sarah w/ things like that. oh ya! score 1! yayayay! so instead erin comes to me and paints mi face. then it gets bad from here.. very bad... so well, im walking w/ josh to the parking lot to see if our rides are here and hes teling me how excited he is cuz hes going to a beach party after this and his gf if going to be there and he hasnt seen her in like 2 weeks! so hes really excited, and i feel very happy for him. so then saturday, im also volunteering (mi last day, josh is in havasue, karlys going to volunteering) so karly tells me that (he was proly gonna tell me but i wasnt online) but anyways, he tells karly who tells me that his gf didnt say two words to him the whole party! and online he said, that shes tearing his heart apart little bi little and how could she do that, and all this other stuff. and as i listen, i feel strong hatred towards roxanne cuz josh is like the nicest guy ive ever met, always wants to get a's (not a nerd, just almost an overachiever type) and roxanne really didnt have to put him through that! if she wanted to be away from him and shes tired of him, then she could've broke up w/ him! GEEZ! THAT DAMN GIRL! HOW STUPID CAN U BE??!! i understand that guys do some mean stuff to girls too, but still.... so, now im waiting to talk to josh cuz hes in havasue again rite now and he doesnt have a comp there and hes coming back tomorrow, and knowing him, he proly cried a lil, so i like NEED to talk to him, and prolly kill his gf :)... god knows if they'r still together though.... ok, gonna go and eat something now! bibi...
xoxoxo~~~
Sarah
PS. if for some reason, josh is readin this, ya.... thats prety much everythin and dont kill karly for telling me! ill talk to u soon... ur invited to mi party! ya.... ok, uve got mi phone, so call me if u wanna talk...

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