listening to: Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Velvet Revolver, My Chemical Romance (itunes party mix) speaking of music, i love Lifehouse, although it makes me cry when i listen to it and the new Weezer album is so disappointing


I wanna take a roadtrip just by myself this summer.

First i've got:
ap history exam: Friday 6th
ap chem: Tuesday 10th
ap environmental science: Wednesday 18th

I've been looking forward to graduating and leaving high school for so long, but now that its almost here, I never thought I would be sad to leave...

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WOW, this weekend has been so crazy craaaazyy!

On Friday I found out that i got a full ride to Carolina! Tuition, books, travel, other expenses..all fuckin paid for!! Heck yea! I cried out of happiness for the first time in my life! All the hard work finally paid off. Jordan and I are arranging to room 2gether. I'm so stoked!!!

Friday night I went to Relay for Life for national honor society. It was so much fun. I brought a cake and we celebrated Xue's 19th B-day there. We were right on time for the lighting ceremony and it was so touching. They had bags with candles and names of cancer survivors, fighters, and deceased ones lined up around the track on the football field. Me, Molly, Xue, Kate, Jordan, Catherine walked together for almost 2 hours. It was so cute how Kate had a crush on red shirt guy (andrew).

On Saturday we (Lyceum class of 2005) headed for Erwin, Tennessee (said with a major hick accent) The cabins were actaully shacks. I woke up with snow all over my sleeping bag! This is such a long story i'm gonna leave out the details...

So we went white water rafting on the NOLICHUCKY river in the SNOW for 4 hours plus. Our guide, Chad was really hot in a wierd way and he saved my life by grabbing me from falling into the icy water. It was so romantic. *eyes flutter* It was so much fun even though i almost got hyperthermia.

Then the next day we went hiking, saw a waterfall, blah blah. Go check out the pics i took on smugmug next week when i have them posted. Overall, it was so much fun!

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mood: insomiatic, but calm at the same time and also very thirsty from allergy medicines
listening to: The Killers and some Beck

So I flew to Boston and shuttled my way to Tufts on Thursday. I met this really nice guy named Ben at the Asian-American center. We clicked right away and found lots to talk about. He hates Tufts, too boring...damn, I would feel the same way too. Then everything just clicked! Why the hell would I want to go to a school that has snow about 24-7, a meager social life, and almost no athletic spirit at all? What was i thinking!? UNC is the perfect school for me! Nice weather, awesome basketball team, bang for the buck, and Southern, and close to all of my friends.

I guess eversince summer school at Harvard, i thought that i really loved Boston. I don't know why its taken me so long to realize, but after visiting Harvard Square agian this weekend, i finally realized that it wasn't Boston that I loved, it was Harvard Summer School. It was everything that had to do with it. I've just never been able to let go...probably never will...

I did campaign a little since I was already there, but I didn't really have any motivation. Talked to the admissions counselors, faculty, tennis coach, gave them my card. Whatever, I should be thanking them for putting me on their waitlist!

I love that everything is just so much clearer now, and i don't regret anything that i've done because its only confirmed my decision. I've learned so much throughout this whole experience.

Today emily had a little b-day get-together. View the pictures i took by clicking on the "gallery" button on the left bar under links.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Ugh...someone shoot me now. I feel mentally, emotionally, and physically sick...like i'm going to be forced inside out. Its such a horrible feeling. I don't know what to do. I was happy that I got into BU, UNC, Bryn Mawr and then UNC winning the national championshiplast night, but then instead of my happiness gradually fading, it just popped like a balloon today. I've already signed the appication to my nice single bedroom apartment at UNC, signed my enrollment form an everything... but them i realized, UNC isn't the school for me. They don't have an engineering program. I want to work with solar/ energy technology and they don't have that kinda program. I also got a call from my Tufts advisor saying that i can significantly increase my chance of being offered admission (i'm waitlisted) if I go there and visit the school to campaign. I don't have the money right now to go though. Hotel, plane tickets, food, etc. GRRR! And BU is ranked like 50, i don't want to go there. Plus its fucking freezing and snowing all the time in Boston. I hate bad weather.

And the person I want to tell this to the most doesn't even give a shit. Damn it- I hate him so much!!! The only reason why I didn't apply to Cali schools was because i wanted to stay in the NE so i could be closer to him. I feel so stupid now.

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