Its upsetting to know that i have a friend who has lost his way in life, and is refusing any help from the rest of us. The strange thing about him is that materially, he has all that he needs. However, one thing that eludes him so far is his love or just..love (aren't we all?). He refuses to do anything but to sit in his room and play his games and contemplate on the great mysteries of life. Our efforts to reach out to him have met with hostile rejections, with a poor kids bike drowning in the first attempt.

Here is one individual that has lost his purpose in life. It has got me thinking on more than one occasion: what is our exact purpose in life as well? Honestly im not too sure myself. Perhaps im just a cog in the machinery just living my life in search of petty pleasures with no divine or poetic purpose. But seeing first hand someone that perhaps the sole purpose of his existence is just seeking love, im not too sure whether it is the healthiest choice either.

If someone wants love, and yet fail to see the kind of affection that his family and friends have for him, woe is he because he is blind. Im not prepared to lose a friend like this, but honestly i don't know what to do as well, so are my friends who truly care, for someone that used to have the zest for living.

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Mantra:

1. Read the Sandman. It'll make you a better person.
2. Listen to Pandora, it rocks. It introduces you to new music with reference to the songs you like.

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It's funny how after so many years, Calvin and Hobbes still seem to crack me up. Even when i've read the strip so many times, i still laugh to myself and myself being rather silly. A six year old kid with crazy imagination and a stuffed tiger, kinda like me and my duck.

pity the writer stopped
Oh Bill what did you do?

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Just realised a lot of people break up because of the Army. Well of course it doesn't affect everyone directly, but you get what i mean. Every male in this nice little red dot of a city has to serve, and for better or worse, everyone, well almost everyone, emerges a different person at the end of it. But through this process, is there a price inherent to pay?

A girlfriend who is used to spend most of her free time with her man now suddenly finds him only available during weekends. Worst still if all he wants to do then is to rest and 'take it easy'. Frequent phone chats and meeting after school are now replaced with calls at night and occasional messaging. Then comes along one day someone who is able to fill the void, to take her out and make her laugh like the boyfriend used to, able to pamper her as he's working with a stable income, isn't any wonder why our women leave us?

Behind the scenes, you sleep at 1030, wake at 530 (hell earlier than most of normal people), do PT (must be nuts!), and go for lessons or training. You go outfield, sweat it out, never believing you'll be doing something this tough in your whole life and your girlfriend is the last thing on your mind because all you want to do is for the pain to end. That's of course on top of the silly punishments and scoldings you get, but you're a man, you can take this shit. But what you cant take is when you finally get back, you're there expecting you'd get some kind of welcome for your hard day's work, only to find someone else cuddling up your girl (extreme case), hey that's wrong with the script isn't it?

She says you're not talking. You think you dont want to bore her with telling her the same old army stuff all the time.
She says you're always so tired. You think she's never ran SOC in her entire life.
She says you're horny. You think there's something more wrong with looking at dicks the whole week.

In the end, you realise it isn't working out anymore. Not trying to point fingers or anything. Just want to point out that when people say they understand, they don't. Unless they have gone through it themselves. I can imagine the suffering you're going through, but anyone will tell you that when the pain hits, you're in a world of difference.

Well to sum up. I think its a culture thing. This place probably has the lowest rate of couples being the same age. You're much better off finding someone that's younger than you. And if you're still with your girl, kudos to you both and know that you have a great girlfriend to be able to put up with your shit as well. Cheers

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I went to Delifrance for a meeting. Nick and I both ordered teas from the menu. He's was fruit tea mine was peppermint tea. When the tea came, i was shocked to see Lipton tea labels on the end of the string. Worst still they even included the packaging of the sachet just for us to see.

What is the world coming to?!!!

Im not expecting tea flown from france! But $3.30 for a cuppa of lipton sachet!! It probably cost like 40cents maybe even less in bulk! The least they could do was to deceive me by putting a phoney label to make me think they repackaged but no!! It was so blantant! Its like telling me what a sucker i am for paying so much for a tea when it would have cost so much less! When you pay for something, there's a certain expectation associated in relation to the amount you fork out, hence value. But in this case, my expectations of my tea was not there at all! Im not critising their use of Lipton mind you, but why cant they do something to justify the price that me as the consumer is paying?!

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Yes Im a sucker..

When everyone says your vocation is lonely, sad and bound to get scolding regularly, why didn't i just believe them?!

Im not just the only one!

Marlon messaged me today: "when they said we had to run around to get radios, i didn't think it was literal."

Not that there aren't people i can befriend there, there are. But noone will understand the problems you have unless they are in your same shoes. Thankfully Jiawei's at 4th floor, but with his own battles to fight. Don't know just feel lonely haha.. its not like previously when all of us go through the same things together. All of us have split up.

Remember: Great comms comes with great responsibility.. so does PA systems..

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