Hm.. Thanks to Feedjit I realise that I've been getting a new visitor who frequents my blog via that one which has been abandoned for a year now.

So that kind of brings the running count of frequent visitors here to 1... + 1... + 1.. + .. all those baboons on NuTang who once in a blue moon, click on this blog just to check it out. Lol.. :D

And it's someone whom I'd never known to drop by here using Mozilla Firefox and running on the new Windows 7 OS. I never knew that 7 is so prevalent nowadays o.O

Could it be who I think it to be? Hm.. In any case, welcome to this little personal enclave of mine which is not very difficult for anyone who's just a wee bit determined to find. (It's rather bumped up on search engines anyway. You just need to know what to put in the search box. And there are 1001 things you can put that will link you here immediately, in like 0.0476s?).

Let's rewind back to the beginning of this post. If you think logically, what does it imply for this blog if that old one'd been dumped by the wayside for a year now?

Righto, you would probably have guess it already. It's indeed the one year anniversary of this fantastic site
(Actually.. That landmark was reached two days ago, haha)

Over the past year I've really enjoyed blogging on this unique and lively platform, much much more than on the one that was bought over by Google many years ago :D Here's wishing for the eternal survival of Dave and his brainchild

No idea whether this is a secret still, but now since it's been a year since that conflict and all I don't really give a damn whether those who have had a falling out with me know about this site. There's more important things to worry about, like that all important Liverpool -Manchester City match-up coming up at 0300 hrs

Last updated - 2350 hrs, 23rd Aug

Thought of the day

Isn't it amazing how the act of picking up the phone and taking the effort to call someone instead of just plain old chatting online show just how much you value that friend? Sometimes in the midst of our hectic lives we just need to hear someone's reassuring voice to feel.. human and not some mindless unfeeling robot. And it also gladdening to know that there's always someone there for you

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It's no use being bitter and angry at myself for all that'd transpired.

Hm.. I wonder if I'll even see the light of day once I close my eyes.
One last time..

Some playwrights once remarked that 'curiosity killed the cat'.
Indeed.

Someone once told me that I had something akin to nine mortal lives.
The only caveat? By that point in time I had already exhausted eight of them.

And in these circumstances
That last remaining flicker just got snuffed out as well.

Through no fault of anyone's do I find myself in such a situation.
I don't even deserve to see myself turn one year older in a few days.

The blame lies with me squarely and I will take responsibility for the debacle.

I admit it
I had been a lousy person.
A useless friend
A paranoia-mongerer




I'm sorry..

Then again..
I'm.. more or less resigned to my fate.
No more second (or is it more appropriately the tenth?) chance for a recalcitrant offender like me.

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A quick shout-out to Aaron - Is there any Internet connection on the terminals you're using at work? As far as I know all the terminals the admins at my side use all only have access to the common intranet and are not exactly the fastest beings in the world.

I'm now blogging from the comfortable surroundings of the mess. As it is a Friday afternoon, there's only one other person here enjoying 987fm on the beefed-up stereo system with me. Well.. Most of the rest have already booked out early by now, save the trainees and those whose weekend only officially starts at 0800 hrs tomorrow morning.

Its very peaceful here indeed.. when there's no one sleeping all over the floor during office hours and the long queues for the terminals. And there are no trainees to crowd you out as well firstly, its still office hours. and secondly they're going to book out today for the weekend before dying a horrible death next week out there making friends with sandbags, trees and mud in the great outdoors.

And after having six weekends burnt by the combination of NDP and SYOG parade ceremonies resulting in lots of missed outings and gatherings, I have finally gotten my Saturdays back. Then again, my week would then commence on a Monday already instead of a Tuesday.

As I'd mentioned some posts back, I was deployed right at the very last minute due to a massive manpower crunch in the whole unit. Then again, dismay turned to satisfaction when I was assigned to guard the top corner of the Presidential box - which meant that I had a panoramic view of the entire show and could potentially be seen by every single viewer around the world should the numerous cameras target the right spot.

Hopefully tonight will be peaceful.. No turn-outs and all. And that I won't feel so tired in between shifts, especially from 0100 to 0400 hrs. Of course the best thing will be for it to rain overnight (: And the DO today is an ex-NH officer from the next department.

The trainees are now getting pumped downstairs. I think they're having their usual 'book-out' drills.

A few thoughts on the SYOG will be up soon.

In the meantime to all S6A and band peeps - I hope we have another outing soon soon soon soon due to all the Saturdays I'd burnt.

On a side note I am seriously wondering if any of them actually visit this site anymore.

Lastly, TGIF and have a great evening ahead

Last updated at 1710 hrs on 20th Aug.

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I guess one must be really really busy if all of a sudden he/she just goes offline without even bothering to say goodbye.

Take care my friend. Hopefully things get less hectic and you'll have more freedom to navigate through your sea of online conversations

Or am I the only damn person on the receiving end of a super-gigantic cold shoulder that has frozen my window for more than two hours straight?

Ultimately I can't fault anyone for being busy. Sometimes the circumstances that we find ourselves wading into are just beyond our control.

In any case, it's going to be a chilly night literally as well. The Met's forecast's holding steady at 25 degrees Celsius - it implies that some natural air-conditioning's on the cards tonight.

One last thing, has anyone noticed that there's a dearth of activity on Facebook as well? With the 'A' level students busy getting into top (mugging) gear and the freshmen having just matriculated I pray that they can at least be sane enough to at least spend some time on the social networking site. Not only does it help them take their minds off the work at hand, reconnect with friends they could not otherwise have the luxury of time to meet nowadays and ultimately allow them to maintain some semblance of sanity, it, at the very least, provides one with something new to look at on the 'Home' page every few minutes or so... No?

Last updated - 190810, 1227 hrs
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Desperado, why don�t you come to your senses?
You been out ridin� fences for so long now
Oh, you�re a hard one
I know that you got your reasons
These things that are pleasin� you
Can hurt you somehow..

Now it seems to me, some fine things
Have been laid upon your table
But you only want the ones that you can�t get
-Lyrics from Desperado - The Eagles

Why are some men just so impatient, possessive and plain old obsessive?

The most important thing I'd learnt all these years is that a guy needs to 100% allow the one he is chasing to have her freedom to make her choice free of any coercion and intimidation.

And to respect whatever choice she makes as a consequence.

You can be twenty-odd years old but yet abuse your position of trust through your adolescent behavior and actions. You can be the nicest guy in the world but show your true colors when your plan did not go the way you'd envisaged it to be. You can wait willingly and hang on indefinitely but evaporate your groundswell of good-feeling by being so damn bloody ass-perado.

There's absolutely nothing to gain in dealing with such a person. Better to put him out of his misery before he gets too much a grasp on your judgement by toying with your conscience. Besides, a real gentleman will absolutely accept whatever decision you make with an open heart instead of using emotional blackmail to achieve his aim. And still willingly remain good friends with you when it doesn't work out.

A friend of mine warned me recently that there're a lot of guys such as these out there in the world. Once you'd shown them your weaknesses and opened too much to them without seemingly knowing them for who they really are, they'll just use this new-found influence over you to arm-wrestle you into accepting their terms - Especially if he sees that you're really dependent on him to hear you out all the time. He'll know how to make full use of this dependency. Beware.

Do err on the side of caution. Heed the warning signs ^^ Be tough when you have to as not all friends are worth having. Why stress yourself out over the potential loss of this.. new dude when you have so many of us to turn to? Why hurt yourself in the long run when it's his own personal choice to hit on you in the first place?

This is just a piece of advice I can give to all my female friends who're matriculating this year. The most important reason why I'd been able to give you an insight into how a desperado's mind work is because I'd been one myself in the past.

You readers are pretty much welcome to give your two cent's view on this issue by commenting.

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I left the house at noon heading for.. somewhere. I had no place in mind, as I absolutely have no one to meet up with as well as anything for me to do, well, besides getting a haircut.

Headed for the train station and instinctively hopped on the one to Marymount since it came first. Transferred over at Bishan and continued on towards town. Whilst on the train I was pondering over where to alight.. And just two stops later at Toa Payoh, something just took over me and I exited the train. A road and an expressway later I found myself at a bus stop waiting for.. a bus. A familiar service came and I hopped onto it without any thoughts whatsoever.

The bus rumbled past my alma mater and a hugely unfamiliar sight greeted me. Ugly looking pits dug seemingly everywhere with heavy machinery strewn all round. So much land was cannibalised that I wasn't even certain if there's even a field left any more. Thankfully I graduated before my memories of the school were adulterated by all these developments.

I dropped off at King Albert Park and walked.. and walked.. to Toh Yi Drive. At a whole row of hair salons I stopped and made a U-turn, turning left at the intersection and headed up Upper Bukit Timah Road. Passing the row of eateries along Cheong Chin Nam Road I realised that the outlet peddling Taiwanese porridge , memories of many an after-band supper with the rest, had closed down.

Turned into the Courts building/mega-store further up the road for much-needed cold air before heading on my way again. Past another bus stop and I reached the old fire station. There I finally got sick of walking (that wart on my left foot made walking long distances rather uncomfortable nowadays) and crossed to the other side to the bus stop.

Bus service 171 arrived and the bus captain's smile temporarily lifted my mood from the doldrums. As the bus unwind the route I had spent close to half an hour trekking in just a few minutes, I had a flashback from 2008 (I just looked through my archives after drafting this and fixed the date to be 17th Nov) running through my mind.

Back then I was on 171 as well, albeit with a friend of mine. We had just parted company with a few others after an early morning/afternoon filled with activities - if I wasn't wrong it was pool and then Wii with some juniors. I was on the way home while my friend was headed for town. Sometime before I alighted, after the bus had ascended and descended down the hill followed by a sharp left turn, our friend boarded the bus and the rest they say, is history.

No idea why it was that vivid. And that sudden.

I dropped off at ION Orchard and spent some time milling around in the iconic mall.. particularly at the Adidas outlet. Orchard's rather crowded for a weekday though I noticed. At nearly 1530hrs I took the train to Bishan.. and went walking around Junction 8. Went into Popular soon after and bought three books on a whim, using my card for the very first time. Those lucky three are -

Too Big to Fail - Inside the battle to save Wall Street by Andrea Ross Sorkin
The Black Swan - The Impact of the Highly Improbable by Nassim Nicholas Taleb
The Best I Could by Subhas Anandan

Great stuff that I'd been eyeing for a while. Is this a case of a shopping binge? Hm.. Finally went home after that at five - after my haircut at a salon five minutes from my place.

So instead of spending five minutes to accomplish my goal, I took five hours. Wandering around is my way of relaxing I guess. Probably what sparked it off was when I took 'no' an answer the night before.

And those bungling fools just took my Saturday away from me once again. What happened to the 'do NDP = no YOG' agreement? Down the drain as usual. Once more they failed to plan for the manpower required beforehand.

When can I ever see them again then? Or you, and you, and you.
Today could have turned out so differently.. But I'm OK now..

Lastly, I shall end my aimless post by sharing with you guys a quote from Judy. Guess some people (Aaron I think) will recall that I'd quoted this before in June 2008. This quote is so good that I think it's worthy enough to enter Wikiquote or something

i'd think that if it's love,
you won't change just to please the other party
(not talking about changing for the better here)
or agree to whatever the other person says
or something along those lines.
ie. simply not be yourself.
and if you're confused,
i'd think that you should really do some deeeep thinking,
rather than make the wrong choices,
do the wrong things,
only to regret later,
or worse still,
hurt others.
not to mention,
be the talk of the town.

- Judy, Oct 2007

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"Relationships-- of all kinds-- are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold on to some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost."
-- Kaleel Jamison, The Nibble Theory.

Interesting quote I got from Shinyi's FB profile. ^^

Anyways, on a side note, everything I planned for this week has either fallen apart spectacularly or not materialised at all.

So much expectation and yearning for nought I guess. It seems that Fate always has us twirled around her little pinkie.

Oh wells. What to do, what to say? And why do I have a feeling that this page is being read by.. your best friend!!?!

This freaking sucks. I can't comprehend the illogicality of it all - for everything! I so so love double standards. Gosh.

What are friends for?

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I stood atop the steps of City Hall, with a view of the whole Padang that many people would really die for (especially Jontay). As the seconds ticked down towards that symbolic moment, the rifles of our SPDS guys stopped spinning, and the crowd hushed as solemnity descended upon the ground itself all of a sudden.

2010 hrs - The once-vociferous crowd was now silent, and the One Voice Show Choir took over. Even the numerous lightstick-plastic flags that they have been waving throughout are now seemingly kept at attention in anticipation of the Pledge.

We, the citizens of Singapore,
pledge ourselves as one united people,
regardless of race, language or religion,
to build a democratic society
based on justice and equality
so as to achieve happiness, prosperity and
progress for our nation.

The National Anthem, Majulah Singapura, followed the Pledge and all we military personnel atop City Hall immediately saluted as a sign of respect towards the nation, and in recognition of the suzerainty the state has over the armed forces.

It was only now after 18 years that I truly understood what the whole Parade was all about and made sense of it all. No doubt my stint in the military has opened my eyes to just how important our country is to us, and we all have a vested interest in how our country progresses both for the foreseeable future, and the long term - 'for this is where I know, its Home'.

As a side note, I'm honoured that even as a mere reserve performing access control duties (i.e. check passes) at City Hall, I managed to have the chance to be deployed to open one half of the ornate double doors for every single MP ranging from NMPs to the MM himself when they entered and left the parade. Add to that list our First lady and numerous ambassadors and the families of all the VVIPs and.. you get the picture. My first time seeing so many people in white . Regardless of what critics may opine, I still feel immensely proud to have performed such a duty for the very people that invariably made our nation into the regional hub it is today.

A brand new day, a brand new story..

Indeed.

Happy 45th Birthday Singapore!


All photos sourced from NDPeeps on Facebook, photo above is taken during Preview on 30th July

The soundtrack used in this year's parade and celebrations can be found here. Heard them so so often over the past 5 Saturdays that I think I'll even miss them being representative of my weekends. The track labelled 'Track 6' in their playlist is actually our Command's march. It was the one played during the 21-gun salute.

The one gripe I have is that the photographers did not actually venture backstage to catch all of us unsung heroes in action. All the technicians and Signals dudes scurrying around, medics opposite our resting area, security personnel (that's us, no AETOS and civilian police in City Hall apparently, so our Command's solely in charge of VVIPs) and the 1PB reservist NSmen have put in their utmost on diets consisting of KFC/Pizza Hut boxes every week as well to make the whole event flow smoothly.

And we have no goody bags..

Furthermore no one popped champagne to celebrate with us (unlike for everyone involved in the show segment) yet we got to stand down and pack up early. Saw a group of chefs taking photos outside City Hall as we left. Chefs?

This all brings to mind the words of our CO which I strongly agree with. No one will ever recognise us if all goes well, be it during GOH, COG or just plain security duties. People will only notice you if we cock up or someone does something stupid. They are always just waiting for us to lose your confidence and screw up. Only then we'll be in the limelight, or better put it, 'STOMP'-ed.

Still, I still can't help relishing the attention we got when two of us walked over to UOB Plaza from City Hall to get some logistics stuff in the afternoon.

Our No. 3 uniforms, with lanyards et al stood out

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