I rolled off the bed, waking from my nap, and caught sight of the clock. 5:21 PM. I cussed here, I was supposed to be at the soccer complex by 5:30 PM to help train the little U10 and under kids. It's by volunteer-basis and it's enjoyable.. I wouldn't say work really. I can see why coaches exist.

So I pull on some athletic wear, and hop into the car with a half tank of gas, empty stomach, and overflowing head. And I'm late, I know it. I'm used to living by the clock so to speak. My thoughts are still racing.

I think.. with all the rushing around I do, I would really like if I didn't have to do this. Have someone would ask. Would you stay awhile longer?

"Yeah, I'd like that."

I'd really love to just rest and not worry about anything. Not work, not the future. Even if it's for a few moments, but I'd enjoy it.

I have quite a bit of schoolwork to finish tonight so I suppose that'll be it. Good night.

Comment! (2) | Recommend!

Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

Comment! (0) | Recommend!

After I dropped my dad off at the shop to pick up the car today I went to the college track course. And I'm not too sure if I'm suppose to be there when I'm not enrolled at the school. But.. eh I probably could pass for a freshman or sophomore in college. I ran a few laps around the track to warm up and then stretched to loosen up.

I brought along with me a stop-watch that snugly fastened around my wrist.

I pressed the Start button. "One," I muttered under my breath, "Two," "Three," and as the "e" left my lips my body contorted as my legs pushed off the rubber footing. I sprinted down the lane and pressed the same button on the watch as I crossed the 100 meter mark. Decelerating to a walk, I subtracted 3 seconds from the time and wrote it down quickly during the 30 second break on the small notepad I had brought.

When the half minute was over, I stepped up to the line, pressed the button, counted, and sprinted. After the fifth sprint I increased the break time to 1 minute. After the fifteenth, a minute and a half.

Rinse and repeat, I thought. Almost mechanic.

After the twentieth sprint the cycle was discontinued and I lightly jogged four laps around the track to cool down before stretching once again. Leaving the track, I placed a few drops of the electrolyte-solution into my water bottle. It's just concentrated electrolytes to help replenish what you lose from sweating. Alone, it tastes like sea water; with bottled water, well.. imagine squeeze a lemon slice into your water at a restaurant. It's more effective than Gatorade but it just doesn't taste good at all.

Mmmh, I'm not in the best of moods.

Comment! (5) | Recommend!

For the last few days I've been under the weather with a few flu symptoms but I have to say that now the worst thing is probably just a stuffy nose. Well, one nostril is clogged so that.. I can only breathe through one nasal passage and that bothers me quite a bit really. But other than that, I'm seemingly good to go. :J Moving on!

School doesn't seem at all like it used to be, perhaps it's because I'm a senior that things are rather surreal. Things have changed since last year, but.. since the start of school things have simply been the same regardless of what happens. This is possibly what makes it seem surreal; it's almost dreamlike because despite whatever happens the previous day, the next day seems unaffected by the occurrences. (School work and projects excluded of course)

I've been working on this sketch/drawing for my Psychology class in order to explain certain elements of evolution. I'll admit, I'm overdoing it. It's not even a grade but.. as of this year grades are no longer the incentive for me to do my schoolwork. With this having been said, I haven't finished the sketch yet and.. honestly, it won't be finished tonight. I suppose my teacher will have to wait. Heh.

I'd also like to add.. I'm in no rush to graduate. :J

Comment! (3) | Recommend!

Oh what a day.

School was alright today though I fell in and out of consciousness in 4th block during a video. It was material I already knew and the presentation of the information was.. rather bland so I slept in an uncomfortable position on my desk with my head propped up as if I were watching. My neck was a bit sore afterward. Heh.

I had dinner with Gussie today, strange name kinda, seems masculine like Gus(Gustav or whichever). Her real name is Sarah, where she gets Gussie from.. I don't remember if there was a story behind it at all. Anyways, I hadn't seen her in a few months and she randomly texted me and pushed to hang out sometime and I settled for a casual dinner.

She had to be home by 7:30 (and we went out to eat at 6) she had plans with other people later that night so it was rather short lived. Outback.. was incredibly crowded, so I changed course to Panera. I had a nice Chicken Noodle soup and she a tasty looking salad. Anyways, I dropped her off afterward and jetted off to play some volleyball with the lads. With Hurricane Hannah (I think with an "h") inching closer and darkness growing we played. Despite the numerous points we battled and won, we lost as Tyler on the other team kept serving it to our weaker member of the team. Not a bit deal to lose, I dove a lot trying to make up for being a man down. By the end of the game, I was covered in sand. It kept the mosquitoes away from my flesh though.

We quickly washed the sand off us with the hose and headed straight into the pool. Heh, it was cold as it had rained earlier today. But at times, it was colder to be above the surface because the wind picked up considerably at time. We played pool basketball and taps for some time and eventually our numbers were reduced to four as some left.

So being only four.. we played Mario Kart on the Wii for some time. I wish the 9 lap option was still available though. That was great in Double Dash. :] I must say, I seemed to get the lightning bolt cloud (curse) the most out of everyone and I get a rush of adrenaline because I panic to pass it on to another through contact. Anyways, I left at 10:30 because I have a soccer game in the morning. Plus, I think I need the rest. Sleep sounds absolutely wonder right now, especially after this week. The Sandman is working his magic.

Comment! (4) | Recommend!

I'm in a strange thoughtful mood right now. The type of mood when you respond to view something in an alternate way.

The majority of the day, I've been doing my schoolwork. *chuckle* I think my mind is a bit fatigued due to a number of mathematical calculations and historical texts. I wonder.. if my eyes look any different right now because they feel incredibly moist. Not that my eyes have been watering for any reason, they are just strangely moist. Hopefully, I'm not getting some kind of eye disease and I'll wake up blind tomorrow.

If I woke up blind in the morning hmm. It's one thing to lose something like sight after having it and having knowledge of what it's like and another to simply never have it at all. I suppose the knowledge creates that gap that becomes filled or empty. *looks away* Moving on.

In unrelated news, I will no longer be working because I simply cannot comfortably balance a plate of school work, soccer, and work.

There's so much I want to talk about it seems, I feel like I'm overflowing with thoughts. I'll try to pick one out from the air quickly.

Marriage intimidates me slightly. And frankly it's not just about the fear of divorce these days. I feel that it would be absolutely necessary to be able to communicate with a spouse even about flaws or things that make another uncomfortable. A matter of trust truly, trust that I don't necessary have to be constantly afraid of how she will react. Iunno, I'm not even 18 so I can't say I know better than another else my age.
Second point, I'm still somewhat.. hesitant (still) to have someone who knows that much about me; someone who is that close to me. It's a sense of vulnerability that flashes through my body quickly and sends shivers up and down my spine to my shoulder area. *sigh, smile* In many ways, I still have a long ways to go before marriage. There's comfort in not having to worry about it.

Comment! (2) | Recommend!