Guys, I'm really tired. Like...Falling asleep at my work desk tired.

How was everyone's Thanksgiving?!
I think we are 1 fruit tart and three cookies away from getting rid of all the Thanksgiving leftovers.

My Nephew Jackson turned three last weekend! He's so cute! I can't believe its been three years since I first me the little stinker.

And my brother and his Fiance are expecting another Baby.
Mixed feelings about that. I'm excited to have another niece or nephew but its the same as it was nearly 4 years ago when they had Mason. Both are unemployed high school drop outs and they are bringing yet another kid into the world. I was hoping baby #1 would get them to be responsible and hard working. Cross your fingers that baby #2 does the trick, I guess.

Christmas is approaching and I love having a full sized tree and being able to decorate outside and stuff! It makes me really look forward to all the other Christmas seasons we will get to spend in that house. It even makes me look forward to having my OWN kids and spending Christmas with them and seeing their excited faces as they come down the stairs and see all the toys Santa brought for them!! We don't plan on having that happen for quite some time but its still nice to think about. I really look forward to raising a family with Scott.

He's terrified, I think, because I always joke that we're going to have twins. My aunt had identical twins, my great grandmother had twins, and we just found out that my cousin is having twins. Plus it runs in HIS family too. Just not as many cases. Whenever I ask him about the optimum time frame that we'd want to have children you can hear the fear in his voice with every word that comes out of his mouth. haha. With good reason though. Twins are TERRIFYING!

Neither of us want kids to happen for a few more years so at least we're on the same page for now. lol.

Well, I've succeeded in getting a small second wind so I better go get some work done.

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So my co-worker waited until 5 o'clock last Friday to give me a letter giving me a sob story about how he can't go to a supervisor because he can't afford to lose his job because he uses the money to support his mom and two daughters. He offered to volunteer at my church. Then he started talking about a time he saved my job many years ago when we were going through lay offs. Which, by the way, was a story that was 100% fabricated by lies and false information. The reason my job was spared had absolutely nothing to do with him and I confirmed that with a person who I knew had a lot to do with my job being spared. He even went on to say "I'm not telling you this for you to think you owe me one, but I'm hoping since you now know about this good deed I did for you so many years ago, you would be willing to keep this incident between you and me".

The fact that he was so unwilling to do the right thing and would even blatantly lie to try to make me feel obligated to keep my mouth shut....it made me so angry that I sent a text to my boss that night letting him know that we were going to have a meeting on Monday and first thing Monday, I went to my boss and told him everything. This guy has gotten in trouble so many times and is always able to weasel his way out of it. I seriously thought he'd do the right thing and the fact that he would try to lie to get out of it is just insulting.

So my boss found out and did some research about company policy and says that according to our company handbook, the only violation of policy he made was about how the company wants employees to treat each other. So my boss said he talked to him and that was it. He didn't get written up or anything! I didn't want him to get fired but I wanted SOMETHING to happen. How many last chances is this guy going to get?! So since my boss kind of let me down, I feel like its still unresolved. Scott's dad suggested I file an incident report. I was suppose to call about that yesterday but I never got around to it.

The whole thing is really fucking stupid.

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So I've recently had the pleasure of someone impersonating me.
Fun stuff!

A fellow Co-worker of mine decided to create a Gmail account in my name, pretend to be me, and email his ex girlfriend. The idiot left it up on his work computer and went home. The next day he called out because he fell down his steps at home and needed to go to the ER. So I had to go onto his computer to set up his Out Of Office and came across "my" email account.

I printed it out and confronted him about it the next day. I told him I wouldn't notify the Police (because this shit is probably illegal) but I hadn't decided yet if I was going to tell our boss. He begged me not to. He was crying and shaking and apologizing. Telling me about his situation with his ex-girlfriend and how its effecting their two daughters and stuff. I tried to be understanding but at the same time, what he did was really fucked up. Now, our boss doesn't really like the guy. He's late all the time, always away from his desk, he's been a no show before and last December, he was out more days than he was in working. So this guy is on really thin ice.

So today I wrote him a letter (so as not to have anyone overhear our conversation) and told him that if he really wanted to make things right and put it behind us, he should tell our boss what happened. I even offered to wait until the owner of the company came back from a conference on Monday and tell HIM instead since he likes the guy more and its the least likely option of him getting fired.

I gave him the letter at 9am and told him that if he refuses to tell them himself, then I will. He hasn't responded to me yet and it is now almost 2:30. I am giving him until 3 before I ask him if he ever plans on responding to me. I THINK I hear him typing a lot so I hope he's just writing me back.

Making this decision was a huge struggle for me. I don't really want the guy to lose his job because he's already on the brink of a break down with all the personal crap he has going on. But he impersonated ME and I need to think about ME and I need to at least have a supervisor know that it had happened. I'm going to be a little upset if he's taking all this time to get back to me because he's writing a letter trying to make me change my mind.

I mean, creating an email in a desperate attempt to get your Ex-Girlfriend to talk about you isn't a HUGE deal. Its not like it effected my bank accounts or got me in trouble...But if he was willing to do this, who knows what else he'd want to do with an email in someone elses name.

I'll keep you guys posted I guess...

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There has been a lot going on in my life as of late and I need to express it a little bit and I think blogging about it will help me sort out my emotions.

as most of you know, TheThaitanic and I are engaged to be wed and are currently in the process of purchasing a home. We close on the house next Friday! I am getting extremely excited but at the same time, I'm terrified that something is going to go horribly wrong. Or that this house is a mistake and its all going to go to shit as soon as we get it. There is no evidence to support this paranoia but I still can't seem to shake this feeling. Buying a house is a huge commitment for any person. It is going to be the most expensive purchase we will ever make. Considering how great my car buying skills have gone (my car is a money pit and I was too stubborn to make a more responsible decision. That's what I get for buying a car strictly based off its outer shell. Never. again.) I think I have a good reason to be a little nervous. So anyway, house buying is making me extremely edgy.

Then there's this whole marriage thing. My friend just celebrated her two year anniversary with her husband this past July and he just told her a few weeks ago that he wants to leave her. After only two years! Their whole dating time frame was 95% long distance so I knew they had some struggles ahead of them but to just up and quit like that just seems crazy. He says he still loves her and cares about her but he just doesn't want to have to do things like communicate, be considerate before making decisions and having someone depend on him or he on them at all. It just seems extremely selfish and my mind is blown that someone can want something with all their heart one minute and completely change their mind the next. I feel so bad for my friend and I have no idea how to be there for her.

There's also another situation where someone we know wants to leave their husband after spending the last 10 years with him and she's hurting so many people in the process. She just lost her brother recently and she's making huge decisions that are going to change her life forever without thinking clearly about all the consequences involved. Not to mention all the hurt she's caused people in the past for rash decision making. It kills me to see people extremely close to me hurting because of her poor life choices. I've been trying so hard to put my already negative feelings toward her aside but with all this new stuff happening, she's not making it any easier.

Now, none of this makes me question my decision to marry Scott. I mean, I've known he was "the one" after only a few months of dating. and we dated for another 2-1/2 years before the question was popped. Our relationship, despite everything we've been through, has remained strong. Always. I would do absolutely anything for Scott and sacrifice so much for his happiness. I have every intention of spending the rest of my life with him, having children together, and growing old right along side him. There is not a doubt in my mind. But I can't help but to start to feel slightly, ever so slightly, insecure because this is the most vulnerable I have ever ever EVER allowed myself to be with someone. and with these marriages all failing around us, again, I just feel a little scared.

I believe and trust that Scott feels the same way about me and loves me very much and would do anything for me but what if he changes his mind in a year. two years. Ten years. its just something really scary to think about. I wonder if the same questions are rising up in his head. I hope not.

So many people have such a negative outlook on marriage whether it be because they feel its outdated, or a waste of time, or if they think getting married is like walking straight into hell. People expect all their problems to be solved magically after getting married. they get into it ill-prepared. People don't take it seriously any more. People get divorced at a drop of a hat. I just don't understand this at all. I take marriage very seriously. I am going to take MY marriage seriously. It has the capacity to be such a beautiful thing! To love someone and have someone to spend the rest of your days with. To learn together, grow together, love together. How can people be so close to this; have all the tools necessary to make it happen and then pass it up so easily?! Its outrageous.

there is a very high probability of you reading this, my love, and I hope when you read about my insecurities that you don't take it the wrong way. I just needed to spell out some of my emotions with all that is happening. Its a lot to take in.

Anyway, I'll probably post again with pictures of our first home! I can't want to start the next part of our journey together however big and (sometimes) scary it might seem.

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So there are lots of happenings in the life of a sporadic funk gal like myself.
As you know house hunting has proven to be fairly unsuccessful and annoying.
Offer # 3 was flat out rejected so we raised our prices and made another offer on the same house. They tell you not to get attached and that its all a business transaction and everything but it is so impossible NOT to get attached to a house you like and picture yourself raising a family/growing old in. Impossible, I tell you!

My sister gets married in two weeks! Her Bachelorette party is this weekend and we rented a party bus for her and 17 friends to ride around and bar hop in Baltimore. Should be crazy. Some of her bridesmaids demanded we get a male striper too so it should be...interesting to say the least! but then after this weekend, its just another 6 day stretch until her wedding and a LOT of stress will be gone! That is, until I start planning my wedding!

And I know you have heard me complain about work before but its worse! Before it was mostly my boss that made me hate coming in every day. But he left at the beginning of the year. Now its the failing company that has me losing sleep and pulling my hair out! Lay off after lay off and yet I'm still here. But with my Fianc� (hehe) and I trying to buy a house, its a little (A lot) stressful to think I might not have a job in the next 60 days. So now I'm on the prowl for a new job. I feel so guilty about it. I want to stay here but there's no opportunity to get a raise or even a guarantee that the company will be open in 6 months. I am actually going to be calling a potential hire on my way home from work. Wish me luck!

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Hello guys! I see that TheThaitanic has told you the good news!!!
Lots of good things are heading our way!!!
Right now we're focusing on buying a house and I'm pumped to go look at a few this weekend. There are three we plan to look at that we're super excited about! Woo!
Then once we become home owners, we will focus on our wedding! =)

Speaking of weddings, my sister is getting married on June 15th of this year and I cannot WAIT! Its so stressful being a maid of honor! haha.

Work is super stressful too. =/

But regardless of that life is good. Better than good. AMAZING. ^_^

Anyway, just wanted to pop in and say hello!

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