Yesterday, I decided that I wanted to get out and walk. It was too cold to really take Gregory out for a walk outside (we can barely get over 40 degrees here...bastard cold front that's been here for over a month), so I decided that I would go to the mall and walk around.

I called Melissa and we went to Flatiron Crossing or just Flatirons to us local folks. If we talk about Flatirons like that, people might think we're talking about the Flatirons which are rock formations near Boulder, Colorado.

Anyway, now that I've thoroughly confused you, we went there and walked around. I take it many other parents got that same idea as there were TONS of people with babies and strollers and all that. The first thing we did when we got there was get some Subway though as we were starving. We were standing in line and someone asked how old he was and I told them "3 weeks."

We ate and then walked around the mall...well, Gregory decided that he wanted to eat about then so I whipped out a bottle and sat down in these comfy chairs they have all over and started to feed him. After that, he was just being fussy and wanted to be held but I didn't feel like sitting in the mall for an hour in a chair because he didn't want to go back in the stroller, so I decided to carry him around the mall. I don't know how many people we saw walking around, but they saw Gregory and were like "OOOH...he's so small." Granted, all the people that said that were speaking in Spanish, so all we heard was "Ooooh...chiquito!" I swear, we must have heard that phrase at least 3 times while I was holding him walking around the mall.

Finally, he was okay enough to go in the stroller...so we wanted to go to the lower level of the mall...the mall elevator was broken. OH GREAT! We had to go into the department stores to go down to the bottom level of the mall...I really hate department stores, but we had to go in there anyway.

Okay, I'm sure you don't want to hear anything about that stuff...but, conveniently, I did find some swim trunks that would be Gregory's size when he's old enough to go swimming (when it gets warm enough). I have been having a horrible time finding infant boys swim trunks (it seems like Target or Walmart only had 12 months or older), but I found some swim trunks at Baby Gap! I was tempted to buy them, but I did not. I will get them later (granted, they still have them)...here's a picture. They have geckos and lizards on them and they're so cute!



Anyway, I better get his "to go" bag packed up. I guess I'm going to Brian's parents house today...even though I first heard about it at about 8pm last night. Brian's like "My dad called you." Yes, I saw that he called me...but he didn't leave me a message...nor did he tell me to be at their house at 2pm today. I mean, the last time I checked, I didn't think that I had ESP or that I could read minds...but I guess I now am supposed to have this mystical power...*rolls eyes*

I told Brian last night (since it's sort of a Super Bowl thing) that if they start drinking excessively and whatnot (which usually happens), I'm not staying...I don't care. If I don't enjoy being around them when they're drunk, I do not feel that my baby should be subjected to that...and if they think I'm a bitch because of it, so be it. I told them I didn't want them drinking excessively around the baby, but they're the type of people that once they have one drink, they do not know when to stop...and it irritates me.

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WELL, I decided that since Brian just goes out when he wants to go out and I have no say in it and whatnot, I ASKED him if he could watch Gregory so I could go out with Melissa last night.

He goes "Oh, I was going to suggest that maybe you should get out..." and I'm thinking to myself, yeah, right...lol

SO, Melissa and I went out for drinks last night and it felt good to get away, but at the same time, I wish I could have taken Gregory. I didn't take him because I don't feel that he should be going to sit at the bar (even though it was in a restaurant) and watch me drinking. I don't want to subject him to that...even though he's little, he could still pick up on stuff like that.

When I left, I asked Brian to clean up the kitchen (since I had made dinner) and he was like "Sure, I'll do that."

I get home - Gregory is sleeping...Brian is sitting on his computer...the kitchen IS NOT clean. I'm like "Uh...I thought you were going to clean the kitchen" and he goes "Oh yeah, I completely forgot about it." SO, I get home and start cleaning the kitchen. Please note, I completely HATE dirty dishes that have sat out for hours because the food gets stuck to all the dishes and it's a bitch to clean up. When I cook dinner, I usually clean up as much as I can while I'm cooking so I have less dishes to clean up later. I learned it from my mom and I think that's a great way to keep the kitchen clean. Brian comes from a family that cooks dinner with 10 different pans and then puts them all in the sink and they sit there all morning. That is just completely disgusting to me.

I let the crock pot soak in the sink (since dinner had sort of baked onto the side of it and it needed some soaking). I was completely tired by then (it was midnight...I had gotten up at 6am...didn't take a nap all throughout the day...I can't do it) and I asked him to clean the crock pot and put it away...that's all I asked.

I get up this morning...not only is the crock pot still in the sink, but it was not put away. There was stew all over the counters and the sink. At least it appears that he attempted to clean the crock pot as it was not filled with soapy water, but still...when you clean something, do you put it back into the dirty sink? Do you clean up the stuff that had splashed all over the counter? UGH...

THEN, I've been having problems with milk supply and feeding :( I pump twice as often (to increase my milk supply) and it just seems like I'm getting less milk each and every time that I pump. It's discouraging...so I've been feeding Gregory formula in bottles so he doesn't starve and then I've been storing my milk so he has some. At the same time, I'll breastfeed him in the mornings and whatnot (so far, I've not found that he's confused by being bottlefed and breastfed...he hasn't had any trouble that I've seen differentiating, even though they do not advise bottle feeding and breastfeeding at the same time for obvious reasons). Anyway, I only have two 6oz bottles with the wide nipple (which is supposed to simulate the breast more than the standard nipples) and I get up in the morning and both of them are dirty...and I have to wash them. I guess Brian doesn't understand how to wash a bottle in the sink with soap and water since he never does it.

I guess while I was gone last night (between 9:30pm and 11:30pm) Brian changed Gregory's diaper which is all fine and dandy...but I went to bed and put the diaper changing stuff on the table (as we change him on the bed) and it never even got moved. I woke up at 4:30 in the morning to feed him and noticed that it had not been moved. He had to have woken up before then...and Brian never changed his diaper. Poor thing...no wonder it appears that he has diaper rash...

Grr...another thing...we went and bought food for his lunch (if he packs a lunch for work, then we save money because he's not buying food)...I told him that the food that we bought (specifically the snack food) was going to be for his lunches. It's like he completely tuned me out or ignored me or something because he conveniently doesn't wake up in time to make a damn lunch before he leaves work (the one day that he took a lunch to work, I made it for him...) and then while I was gone last night or sleeping or something, he raided the cupboards and ate a ton of the snack food, had the cookies out, and he ate the cup-o-noodles thingy that we bought specifically for him to take in his lunch. He told me the other day that he eats leftovers, yet they're still sitting in the refrigerator (uneaten)...

AHH...it's driving me up the wall! As you can see, I'm just completely and utterly stressed out. My mom said that my decrease in milk production might be due to stress, but seriously...how do I become unstressed if it seems like I'm the only one taking care of the baby!

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Since Brian and I now have our money combined into my checking account, I can check to see what things are being bought and whatnot...

Brian's been out drinking 3 times this week. He went out on the 29th, the 30th, and again last night. One of those nights, he lied about it...he told me he was over at his friend's house modifying his xbox (which I believe)...but I mean, he was over there for hours and he said that it was a major pain in the ass to mod and that's what was taking so long. He's modded a bajillion xboxes before and I thought it was strange that it was taking him so long...LOW AND BEHOLD...I check the bank account, and there's a charge from the damn Old Chicago.

He comes home at 1am and then goes to bed...

Me, I've been at home all day with the baby. I give him all my time and attention (to the point I get no sleep, NADA...I can't even take a shower!). It just pisses me off that he could go out and then specifically lie to me about it...yet use the damn bank card so I can see where he went. The fact that he also went there the day after that...and then again last night, it fucking pisses me off.

I mean, we're trying to save money here and he's out having drinks every fucking night! Hell, you'd think spending time with your son and giving your girlfriend a break (who's been up and down, feeding, changing diapers, occupying the baby all day - on top of cleaning up Brian's messes for the most part...fixing dinner, doing the laundry, etc.) would be more of a priority...BUT...I guess not.

Seriously, I don't think he's grown up one bit since our son has arrived. I guess I have a taste of what it's like to be a single parent taking care of two kids...grr...

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You know, when you get the items on your credit report cleared up the amount of junk mail involving credit card applications roll into your mailbox. Seriously, this past week, I've gotten at least 10 credit card applications! That's ridiculous! Where's the shredder when you need it...seriously!

I went and ordered my free credit report and credit score to see how much it has improved since we cleared up some stuff, but now I have to wait 10 business days for my "secret code" to come in the mail. Ugh...why can't they just tell me now? I guess I understand why they do this, but it doesn't help me when I want to see it now versus later...oh well.

Anyway, I'm going to go eat some licorice and maybe heat up some leftovers and eat dinner before my little munchkin wakes up. He drank 4 ounces this last feeding (which is a lot for him...he usually only takes about 2.5 to 3 ounces...and here he ate this huge meal)...he may be knocked out for a while...lol

EDIT: Oh yeah, in my haste to go make myself some leftovers from the refrigerator, I forgot to mention that Brian has been getting lots of calls from people about jobs. I'm sort of excited for him, but I mean, this has happened before and nothing has changed...so I'm not even going to get excited until I can see that it may be fruitful. So far, some guy from IBM had called him 3 times this morning (and he was sleeping...didn't pick up...NOT GOOD) and he's been talking to people at Lockheed Martin...SO...we'll see *crossing fingers*

If he gets a good (fantastic job - making twice as much as I do with him alone or at least what me and Brian make combined), I may be able to stay at home with Gregory and possibly just have a part time job :) NO BABYSITTERS is what that means...I HOPE I HOPE I HOPE!

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I Love the 70's is on...version 2 (which I have not seen)...

I don't know what it is about those shows that I absolutely adore and I can't get enough of them. I need to watch them...I like the I Love the 80's series better because of all the stuff in the 80's that I do remember from my childhood and whatnot. I so wasn't alive in the 70's, so it doesn't hit as close to home as all of the 80's stuff does.

I can't believe tomorrow is February...and on Friday, Gregory will be 3 weeks old! It's just NUTS! The time really does fly by...AND, speaking of time...I have to contact my work tomorrow (not only to talk to the HR lady, but to see about figuring out a feasible work schedule). I figured I would wait until after end of the month because we're always so busy around end of the month. I'm going to attempt to see if I can go back to work at some point next week...as we need the money :( I wish money were no object!

Anyway...happy early February (15 days until Valentine's Day - I had a teacher that celebrated Un-Valentine's Day - I'll explain later)...

Here's some Gregory pictures (okay, I'm a little obsessed with posting photos of him...but he's seriously so cute, I can't help but share!)

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I'm excited for my best friend (I have two best friends...not to be confused...my Washington best friend [Mellanie] and my Colorado best friend [Melissa]) and Mellanie called me today to let me know that she's going to be getting married!

She initially called and stated that she wanted me to save the date (January 19, 2008) and I thought she was going to come out to Colorado to visit me or something...but then she's like "No, you're coming here," and I was really confused. THEN, she told me she was getting married and she wants me to be her maid of honor!

I've never been in a wedding before and it excites me that she wants me to be her maid of honor. Then at the same time, I can't help but feel jealous. It's like I'll never get married or anything...she did bring up the fact that I got to have a beautiful baby boy before she did, but I can't help but thing I was doing everything out of order. Should I have gotten married before I had a baby? Do I even need to get married now? Ugh...so confused!

I should seriously be taking a nap right now, but all I can think about is how Mellanie is getting married. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for her and I wish her the best...but at the same time, I wish it were me :(

OH WELL...

I am thinking about getting professional pictures done (since he's so cute...and I know someone can take better pictures than I ever could). Someone got me a subscription (I don't know who) to Parenting Magazine and there were coupons for the JC Penney photo studio and I was amazed at all the different options they have for photos now a days and I figured those would be perfect. They have such cute layouts for Valentine's Day, but I'm not sure if he'll be old enough by then. I sort of want him to be old enough to where he can smile...and hold his head up and whatnot. Maybe sometime in March or even for Easter in April or something.

Anyways, since I'm talking about photos, I figure I should post at least one of me and Gregory (since I rarely post photos of myself)...


here's me sporting my double chin...I didn't want one of Greg with the pacifier in his mouth, but oh well...


like mother, like son...here's Greg sporting his double chin...hehe


here's a yawning boy...

OKAY, I'm getting tired now...I think I'm going to take a nap.

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My mom is going back to Seattle today...we're leaving for the airport in about 2 and a half hours.


Mom (Grandma Sue) holding Gregory

You never realize how much you miss and adore your parents until you're away from them for a long time and then they come and help you. If my mom wasn't here for the past two and a half weeks or so, I don't know if I would have been able to cope with having a new baby. She helped me out SO much and I am going to miss her being here.

I'm already planning my vacation to go back home to see her and the rest of my family with Gregory in tow in July. We do a big family get together camping trip in the summer (on my mom's side of the family), so we're going to go home for that. Granted, we don't necessarily camp out like you would think with the whole camping thing, but it's all about being with family. We camp out in tents in my aunt's front yard (or sometimes, my other aunt's back yard) and we have fire pits and we sit around and barbecue and all that. It's just nice being with family...and I can't wait to show them all Gregory.

My mom and my aunt are going to drive out to Denver in April. I am hoping that the weather isn't too horrible going over the mountains and they'll make it here. They've got to drive over at least 2 mountain ranges that I can think of (The Cascades and The Rockies) and you know how the snow goes up in the mountains.

Anyway...I'm going to go sit in the living room and enjoy my silence at the moment (as Gregory is sleeping) and maybe I'll be back later.

I'll leave you with some pictures...


Gregory...thinking REALLY hard


Gregory sleeping pretty well right before we left to go to Chili's last night to eat dinner with "Auntie" Melissa!

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I'm sort of addicted to this website again (okcupid)...and I'm wondering if it's a bad thing. Granted, it's a dating site of sorts...but it's also a site for making friends and whatnot. You can take tests too on there. Here's one that I took (take it if you're interested)...The link to the test is at the very bottom of the results. They've got lots of fun, interesting test/quizzes that I like better than other sites.

Pushover - ISFJ 40% Extraversion, 20% Intuition, 46% Thinking, 66% Judging

Hah. Nice one. How does it feel to know that you're barely unique? Of all the personality types you could have had, you ended up with the most common in all of America. In a group of 100 Americans, 12.8 of them will be just like you. I bet you feel sorry for that one person missing 20% of his body. I bet you want to help him out, don't you? Cause that's what you like to do, isn't it? Help people. You don't want to save the world. You just want to help people out. Sound pretty good so far? Sorry, but you're just plain pathetic. You let people walk all over you all the time, because everyone knows that you just can't say "no." When you get time, email me your contact details. It’s always good to know where I can find another helping hand. What the hell is your problem? GET A LIFE! Stop cleaning other people's houses and go out and have a bit of fun every now and then. Sure, you feel responsible for doing what needs to be done, but sometimes it's just not you who needs to do it. You're dependable, predictable and practicaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... Whoops, that was me falling asleep on the keyboard. You're just not the most fun person. I wouldn't worry too much about it. You can go hang out with your other 12.8 mates, helping out at the soup kitchen together. Woohoo! ***************** If you want to learn more about your personality type in a slightly less negative way, check out this. ***************** The other personality types are as follows... Loner - Introverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving Criminal - Introverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving Borefest - Introverted Sensing Thinking Judging Almost Perfect - Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving Freak - Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging Loser - Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving Crackpot - Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging Clown - Extraverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving Sap - Extraverted Sensing Feeling Judging Commander - Extraverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving Do Gooder - Extraverted Sensing Thinking Judging Scumbag - Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving Busybody - Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging Prick - Extraverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving Dictator - Extraverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging

This test tracked 4 variables. How the score compared to the other people's:

	Higher than 36% on Extraversion
	Higher than 1% on Intuition
	Higher than 34% on Thinking
	Higher than 82% on Judging

Link: The Brutally Honest Personality Test written by UltimateMaster on Ok Cupid

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