How can I not be angry when you keep on implying that I am when I really am not angry?

Seriously woman, stop doing that or I don't care if you're a year older, way cuter, more polite, much more innocent and very much more likable than me, I will explode on you, in front of the class, in front of the lecturer. Seriously, you don't know me well enough to differentiate my expression when I'm angry and when I'm trying hard to remember and keep remember the instructions that were given to me. Stop saying "chill" or "relax" or "don't be angry" every 30 seconds, does not do anything other than infuriate me. Also doing that right after the lecturer gave back to group work for some touch ups IS NEVER GOOD. I am not like you, I usually absorb all the information I get and try to remember as much as I can before I forget any of it instead of processing it when it is delivered to be because sometimes there is too much to process and I'll miss things out.

I only have that set of expressions and unless you can decipher the small details which makes it different, keep your mouth shut. Giving me hugs and encouraging talks after that doesn't help either. What helps is you keeping your mouth shut.
I wasn't even grumbling or ranting or anything, I just sat there, staring at that piece of paper. Furthermore, it wasn't my fault this assignment wasn't looked through, it is because of you who didn't have time to finish the conclusion in a week. Funny, huh? And which idiot would be angry when your lecturer gives you back your work so that you can get better grades?

I am tolerating you because you don't know me that well yet and because you have a slightly different kind of views than I do. I pray hard that I will continue being able to tolerate you.

Hugs To: ranor, renaye and AlexisNg.

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The Book Thief is full of sarcasm!! It’s like watching House... I like it for some weird reason. Though for some odd reason, I can’t really detect much of it in speeches. One of the phrases in the book went: “What’s worst than a boy who hates you? A boy who loves you” I was trying hard not to laugh in the bus at that. It is so true when you don’t have the same feelings for the guy. Poor guy...

Anyway, I know getting average 6 hours is good, my eye bags from those are horrible that some of my classmates wonder if I am over working myself. It sucks! I need to get used to not getting at least 8 hours average.

I need to get my uncle a Christmas present... But I don’t know what because he either gets whatever he wants himself or his girlfriend will get it for him. What is left for the niece to buy? Everything else he doesn’t really need.... which is why there are so many unused things here. Sigh... I guess I shall be his personal assistant for a little while longer, since he becomes my driver on certain days.

Seriously, I hate not knowing what to get people I want to give something to!
I also think that I’ve chosen the wrong course. Seriously, I don’t know if it is right or wrong to think that some people think that I’m their personal psychologist or something. I don’t give the best opinions or advices anyway. Sometimes, people tell me things... I don’t quite want to know. I hope I don’t blurt things out unconsciously. I don’t want to lose their trust, well the trust of some people whom I consider important that is. I sometimes wonder if I am chosen on purpose.

Is it me or most girls don't like being out of their comfort zone? I mean, most people have their very own comfort zones, some bigger than others but I do notice that girls are more reluctant when it comes to expanding comfort zones..

What to do? What to do? I don’t know what to do. I’m babbling at this point, I know, just need to get the random points out of my head, read some more of The Book Thief, go to bed early and wake up tomorrow to do my assignment!

Hugs To: randomjunk, renaye, AlexisNg, jolenesiah, bluetopaz and ranor.

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......fun yet not fun because my deduction is right! My feet are aching! Resting them right now.. I thank god I don’t need to walk tomorrow, just short distances up and down the stairs.

My mother, grandmother and youngest brother came over on Saturday. I was tired after working a full shift so I started shouting at every noise they make. Seriously, I don’t know how a person can drive while blasting some disco music in the car. Totally “ah-beng” ( The term is used to describe people with the most horrible fashion sense and the things they do which is thought to be cool but totally NOT!)That was alright. After that, they did their usual gathering in my room when all I wanted was rest. Even if I’m sitting here in front of my laptop, I am resting. I totally don’t know WHY they like to do that.

Damn the smell of my brother’s instant noodles is making me hungrier. I want to sleep early so I don’t want to eat but it smells so delicious!! T___________T

I think I’ve turned into some kind of an insomniac.. The average sleep I’m getting nowadays is 6 hours without having something waking me up. It’s either that dreaded pump or I’d wake up by myself and I can’t go back to sleep. It is so annoying! The worst part is that no one would buy me beer! Based on the hours I slept after drinking any alcoholic beverages, I would be able to sleep through the noise. I would need to go get it myself during break and sneak it into work. It creates a bad impression if I were caught.

Anyway, I’m sleeping early though I clearly know what it is that I want to cook right now. I shall do that tomorrow morning.

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I got the job! I’m starting work tomorrow evening since they need to rush to get the shop ready for the opening on Saturday. Renaye, I don’t know about the staff discount yet but I might ask later. Technically I’ve started work yesterday right after the interview, for an hour. It was nice...

Wish me luck guys... I hope I can cope with this then I’d get to go to Aussie the moment I graduate from this course! I am having my uncertainties, as usual, nothing much. I’m sure Natalie or Estrella can do something about it... I hope. I shall not procrastinate as much.

Oh yea, I’m 9 PPS short of the 500PPS I need to buy the “@nutang.com” thing for emails from the NuStore. I hope I can get them (PPS) soon! I'm a few days pass my 2nd 'Tang-niversary! I can't believe I forgot about that.

I hope my lifestyle won't alter too much from before, other I spend less time procrastinating. I do hope I get to come here as often as I want.. it sucks to get left behind.

Till next time (which would probably after work on Sunday), be safe.

Hugs To: randomjunk, jolenesiah, AlexisNg, and etheracide.

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I lack focus lately. Need to focus!!

I cleared this small personal issue which was stuck in my head for the whole day yesterday. It's hard to reason with myself when I overreact.. Sorry Estrella for disturbing your at the wrong time, sorry Max, I think I got on your nerves with something I said, thanks EW for cheering me up and thanks Ralfie, cousin.. thanks for answering my stupid questios. Ironically all I need to do is to look back into a period of time and pin-point that one person and I had an epiphany of some sort. I feel so relieved right now that I'm blogging at about 3AM. I told myself that I'd study but a post won't hurt I guess...

Natalie says that she'll be taking my laptop away =P

I hope I can focus on studying before this side of the world wakes up and start making a lot of noise.

I finished my part of my AIB report and made a lot of incoherency and inarticulation. Well, my eyes hurt and my head throbbed. I still can't start straight at the laptop for long periods of time.

Anyway, have to go study for Economics and forget about my mother coming this weekend thinking that she can change one's plans with the snap of her fingers. I'd like to see her try though...

Hugs To: randomjunk, jolenesiah, AlexisNg, bluetopaz and renaye.

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This is a picture of her.

What? You don't see anyone there by the cupboard?? What d'you mean you DON'T SEE HER?

Ouch! She just whacked me on the head saying "I'm invisible to everyone else but you, Stupid!"

She also says that if I don't finish this stupid post quickly, she's going to make sure that it never makes it onto the net.

Yea, she's a frightening chap but very effective at making me stop procrastinating.

Okay, procrastinating time is almost over. Got to go before she take my food away.

She asks if anyone else has an invisible friend? She wants know them just in case she wants to ditch me and go hang around with them for a while.

Take care everyone... I have to go study for this Thursday's Economics test which will be 20% of my overall marks.

Hugs to: jolenesiah, renaye, AlexisNg, bluetopaz and Dilated.

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