So earlier I was thinking about how to appologize to Stuart for my behavior on Sunday. I pretty much figured out what I'm going to say, but I'm debating on whether to just wait and hope I see him soon {before its too late for an appology} or to text him tomorrow or the next day. I'm not going to call him, just simply cuz I don't really call anyone anymore.

What I found interesting about it is that I read my horoscope every now and then just to see what it says and how funny it can be in regards to my actual life. Well, the ones I read for today are pretty interesting {even though I don't believe in 'following' them}

Here's one:
It could be that you are feeling a strong sense of guilt at this time, dear Libra, because of something you did in an effort to feed your own ego. Be aware of how your actions have affected others and apologize for what you have done. Guilt is basically a useless emotion that you should rid yourself of as quickly as possible. Don't let this feeling keep you from opening up your heart the way you need to in order to restore it to its original innocence.

And here's the other one I read:
Do you know your limits? Its time to find out what they are -- especially in terms of your social relationships with others. If you have ever be accused of 'oversharing,' then try to hold back a few of your inner thoughts today. Its not that no one cares; its just that people have a lot of other things to think about. Wait for people to ask you what's going on in your head instead of spilling it all at the very first opportunity you get. A little mystery couldn't hurt, you know.

After reading them, I just had to smile. These actually sort of go along with what I'm dealing with at the present time. And I didn't read them until after I had already planned on appologizing to Stuart. Its sort of funny just how things seem to work at times.

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Mid-January it was in the low 20s. Barely two months later its up at 90+.

How can Mother Nature change the temperatures so rapidly in such a short period of time?

~ *This is actually just sort of a rhetorical question. I'm just frustrated that it was snowing less than two months ago and now they're calling for record highs that haven't been reached in years.

Okie doke, small mini-rant over.

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This was originally going to be password protected, but I think I might need some advice.

As you may have read on my other name, I haven't had much of an appetite lately. I eat something small once a day and that's about it. I'm not completely starving myself, but I thought about it and I think I'm doing this on purpose. I'm purposely ignoring the cravings for food. I found that if you ignore it long enough, the cravings go away. Its not even cuz I am dissatisfied with how I look. I'm actually pretty content at my appearance. I just don't want to eat.

Another thing is that I know I need help, but I will only admit it to myself. I won't admit that to anyone else. Even though I know I need the help, I still refuse to go cuz I don't feel that they can do anything for me. I feel as though its a waste of time and money to pay someone to listen to your problems. I'm anti-medication so if they were to prescribe me for anything, I'd never get it filled or take it.

I have a tendency of over-analyzing everything too. Its a bad habit I've had since I was younger. Right now I'm over-analyzing the Stuart situation. I even know that its got nothing to do with him. Its everything to do with me and my problems and issues. He's done absolutely nothing wrong. I'm trying so hard not to push my limits and I'm almost afraid I've already done that. I keep asking myself why this had to happen. Why I became interested in someone when I was doing so well at not. I really want it to go somewhere, even with the knowledge that it'll end in a few short months due to the inevitable moves we are both making, but I know that it can't.

Yeah, I think that's it for now. I'm really tired so I'm not thinking as clearly as I normally do. Maybe if I think of anything else, I'll come back on here and write about it. If you do leave any advice/help comments, here's my thanx ahead of time.

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The only problem with having a day off from work, is when I have to work the next morning. I sleep in cuz its my day off, but then when I have to go to bed so that I get enough sleep for the next day, I find that I'm not tired.

I try waking up 'earlier' on my days off so that I don't have this problem, but when I look at the clock and its before, say 9, I think to myself 'I don't have to get up. I'm not working this morning' and I go back to sleep.

Its ten till 1 in the morning and I should probably be laying down for the night. But I'm not. I'm on the comp. I even have music playing to maybe help put me to sleep. {I can't sleep in silence; whenever the radio signal goes out or a CD I have playing ends, the silence wakes me up}

Ugh! I'm out of stuff to say so I'm gonna lay back down now and try to sleep.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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