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****ATTENTION****
*The things that are written in my blog are full of feeling, emotions and ideas that aren't usually displayed by myself in reality. Some will be shocked and surprised at my expressiveness and may take it the wrong way. The only things that are said here are the truth and not meant to hurt anyone but to just get my feelings out there. Pls understand this is my way of speaking out my heart and I do not intend any hurt. Please leave now if you feel that I'm being unreasonable...but this is me...*
PIC OF THE MOMENT


My sexy friends on a luxe night
from left: Jess, Jason & Mel

THE REALITY BEHIND THE DREAM


murasaki*dream
Age. 40
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. chinese
Location perth, Australia
School. Other
» More info.
YOUR OPINION
LYRICS OF THE MOMENT
Faye Wong

Eyes on Me


I never sang my songs
On the stage, on my own
I never said my words
Wishing they would be heard
I saw you smiling at me
Was it real or just my fantasy
You`d always be there in the corner
Of this tiny little bar

My last night here for you
Same old songs, just once more
My last night here with you?
Maybe yes, maybe no
I kind of liked it your way
How you shyly placed your eyes on me
Did you ever know?
That I had mine on you

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you`re never hurt
As if you`re never down
Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then
I will know that you are no dreamer

So let me come to you
Close as I wanted to be
Close enough for me
To feel your heart beating fast
And stay there as I whisper
How I loved your peaceful eyes on me
Did you ever know
That I had mine on you

Darling, so share with me
Your love if you have enough
Your tears if you`re holding back
Or pain if that`s what it is
How can I let you know
I`m more than the dress and the voice
Just reach me out then
You will know that you`re not dreaming

Darling, so there you are
With that look on your face
As if you`re never hurt
As if you`re never down
Shall I be the one for you
Who pinches you softly but sure
If frown is shown then
I will know that you are no dreamer
CHATTERBOX
CHILLIN'
Faye Wong -Eyes on me
(Classic!)






Job personality based on your b'day
Monday. 3.22.04 12.30 pm
*Try this out! I agree with the Western grid more than the Chinese one (So negative! Nothing like me...). Very interesting and accurate! :)

E-von - Born: 24 March 1984 Gender: Female Lunar Birth Date: 22 2 1984 (day/month/year)

Ki System
Natal Year number: 7

Although E-von may have taken a considerable time to reach maturity (SO TRUE! hehehe!), she is nevertheless a quick thinker whose ideas change as rapidly as her conversation. She's an individual who wants to be liked, and as such finds it hard to refuse requests. For the same reason she dislikes arguments, and wherever possible will compromise to avoid conflict. Not the sort of individual to be employed in litigation, but excellent in mediation.

Natal Month number: 7
E-von is a good communicator and enjoys discussion, but she will avoid stressful situations and arguments. She is a fund of new ideas that spill from her active brain with great rapidity, but her business dealings will always be constrained by her desire to be liked. She therefore lacks those long-term goals that would bring her prosperity.

Natal House number: 5
With independence of mind, E-von may have seemed to be something of a loner in her early life (hahaha maybe...). But as she matures that independent streak will lead her to positions in which others will rely upon her judgement and impartiality. Whatever skill she masters, whatever career she pursues, it should be one where her natural talent to command can be properly utilised.

Comments based on Western Grid:
1
Although E-von may be reasonably talkative in public, she finds it difficult to express personal feelings to those closest to her. In employment terms, this inhibition is of little consequence.

2
Sensitive to criticism and naturally intuitive, E-von has a natural ability to detect insincerity in others. Because she is a sensitive soul, E-von can be a solid friend and a good listener. As a result, she will get on well with colleagues, whilst being more than capable of handling office politics. (True true)

3
With a creative mind and a good memory, E-von is honest, straightforward and optimistic. She will achieve her aims. She is capable of creative thought, and will appreciate art and music (Ever since I was a kid). She also enjoys an excellent memory - a significant advantage in any employment.

44
A good organiser with creative ability, E-von is inclined to concentrate on pursuits that bring material success, to the exclusion of all else. She likes to take a project from beginning to end, and will work long and hard to achieve success in her chosen field. Potentially, there is something of the craftsman in E-von , who could well enjoy the creation of beautiful objects.

8
Good with details and with a methodical approach, E-von nevertheless is someone who enjoys constant new challenges to maintain her interest. She is a methodical individual with attention to detail, but is inclined to leave tasks unfinished if her active mind alights on something of greater interest. Routine tasks that fail to challenge her intellect are at greatest risk, so E-von needs a job that offers variety.

9
Ambitious to improve her lot, E-von will constantly push forward to achieve something in her life, yet this ambition will be balanced by humanitarian ideals that will lead her to support causes that may demand self-sacrifice.

[The Arrow of the Planner: the numbers 1, 2 and 3] Although less interested in the detail, E-von is a well-organised individual who plans ahead. If she absorbs knowledge through study, she will achieve great success, quite possibly in an artistic field (My dream!). The essence however of this combination is her desire to plan, and to organise herself to achieve her goals.

Comments based on Chinese Grid:
1
E-von will make some money and enjoy a reasonable standard of living.

222
Without the numbers 8, 1 and 6 in the Chinese version, E-von may not enjoy good health, and could well suffer from a major illness. (I'm one of the biggest health freaks- WTF??) Without the numbers 4 and 9, she will lack the drive and energy needed to work without supervision.

4
Intelligent and logical, E-von is not someone who acts rashly on the spur of the moment.

8
In the absence (in the Chinese version) of the numbers 1 and 6, she will be good with money and details. (Ahuh- shopping my hobby hehehe) She will be happier if the Chinese grid includes the numbers 5 and 7.

9
Although E-von is ambitious, her ambition is tempered with humanitarian ideals.

[The Arrow of Intellect: The numbers 2, 4 and 9] E-von is intelligent, articulate and enjoys a first-class memory. She has a logical and analytical approach that suits her to the legal, medical or accountancy professions. (PFFT! A doctor? Lawyer!? haha)

[The Arrow of Loneliness: Lacking the numbers 3, 5 and 7] E-von is so determined to achieve her objectives that she does so at the expense of all else, including friends, family, love and laughter. (I think not!)

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Weekend update - somewhat bleh!
Monday. 3.22.04 9:39 am
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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*Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*
Wednesday. 3.17.04 5.37pm
mood: sleepy zzzzzzzzzzz

SOOOOOOOOOOO Buggered right now! I'm just in the university computer labs waiting for my lecture that I have at 6.30pm. I'm just tired from the day because earlier this morning I had a class at 9-12. Had a HUGE break and went down to subi for oriels lunch and il gelato ice-cream! I'm getting hooked on that stuff hey! :) But so FULL by the end of it I don't really feel like eating the next 3 meals! That is soooooo bad! Now I wanna sleep cuz of the full tummy and dead tired!

Someone needs to slap me in the face so I my head won't fall on this desk! I'm seriously that sleepy...my eyelids are sooooooo heavy! How am I managing to type this? I'm blinking every 2 secs hehehe! I shouldn't do this to myself...should've just went home and slept then come out again for the lect. BUT WHAT ARE MY CHANCES OF WAKING UP? So demotivated right now lol!

I'm gonna snooze for the next hr...see u soon pplz...in my dreams...hehehe...oh yeH I got a class. DOH! *grumble grumble*

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say bye bye
Monday. 3.15.04 8.47 am
mood: clingy
listening to: here with you - 3 doors down

Last night at 11 pm, Perth time my family waved goodbye to my older bro at the domestic airport. My bro was dressed up so nice and looked so professional. In his snazzy jacket, his morrisey shirt, laptop bag slung over his left, business sling bag on his right and ticket in hand. I dunno that picture of him standing under the gate 5 - Canberra...I wasn't sad but proud of him! He is the big brother, he is setting the example for us...it is gonna be hard to match up to him. No doubt he is gonna make his life a GREAT one. Missing him already, even before he was out of the door. *sniff* . But he is already planning to come back in 4 weeks to pick up more stuff...hahaha...so nobody was really sad cuz this guy will be back. He is too clingy to PERTH. It was sweet to see him and Jocelyn hug at the airport gates, awwww...I think she is perfect for him. :) He better come back for her!

We also had an early b'day celebration for me...it was weird!!!! Cuz it could've been someone's birthday and yet I had the cake, cards and photos been taken when I have another 9 days to go! DUH! Nah....it was because my mum wanted my older bro in my pics...which is what I wanted too. I didn't take it seriously... hehehe...I didn't even get to blow out my candles! But the whole fam helped me out. Cuz it's tradition that 5 of us blow out at the same time.

It is tradition also that they give me a bday card, each if my fam members writing individual wishes. I was very touched by this cuz my bro said he will be back to guide me and also do business with me which we have talked about. My lil bro is just a jokester and appreciates me for being his big sis. My dad and mum just wrote that they are proud of me, no matter what and that was nice to hear. That is what a child needs to hear every now and then, that they are making their parents happy. Then me being stupid again...shed a tear (man I'm such a sook lately!) becuz I don't think I am worthy of such wishes. *sigh*. Ahhh..it's not even the DAY yet!

But it's all good...no need to celebrate any more...hehehe doing it earlier kinda feels like it never happened and therefore I don't feel like I'm getting OLD! Does that make any sense? hehehe...Being 20...have yet to know the feeling

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TSZUJ it for me BABY! ;)
Friday. 3.12.04 8.41 pm
listening to: things just keep getting better
mood: can't complain ^_^

I'm absolutely in love with the FAB 5, from queer eye (Ted, Kyan, Thom, Carson & Jai) and QAF (Brian, Micheal, Emmett, Ted, Justin) hehehe....why do all good things come in 5? These guys...as proud homosexuals, they truely inspire me - not to become a LESBIAN (So all guys lay down your fantasies) but the fact that they can live their lives the way they want it to be, have fun, don't give a FUCK at others' opinions and just be proud of WHO they are! But most gay guys I have met they have been so bitchy, when will I meet a nice one!! Hehehe...my goal in life to meet a NICE GAY GUY! Not getting my priorities straight here am I? hhaha!!!

STRAIGHT GIRL + STRAIGHT GUY = SUPPOSEDLY PRIORITY # 1 (???)

'Tszujing' - Taking something and tweaking it, fluffing it, nudging, finessing it to be a lil more fabulous and fun. e.g to tszuj your hair, tszuj your sleeves... (at first it sounded like some kinda ART OF WAR).

Time to tszuj up my life! Ahahaha....I'm doing pretty well after a week of HELL! I bumped into Danae - my long lost soul sis the other day and had a quickie with her (I mean catch up to all u sickos!) hehehe...and it was nice to hear about what she was up to! She went to M'sia! It seems everyone was going back to M'sia these hols except me! hehehe...I saw Amanda my MUD fren at the checkout today and that was another quickie. :)

One point today I was sad though...shouldn't really talk about it. But when mum came to ct to pick me up after work so that we could go home on the bus together. I didn't want to cuz I had some errands to run. Anyways she gave me a hug when we depart and said 'see u at home'...it was a odd hug - like the grudge was still there and felt like limp and gross and somewhat pointless. I walked away with tears welling up...but I just hate it when we're like this...

Anyways...generally happy with life atm. No complaints...so this should be ez reading hehehe! Hope u all have a great and safe weekend! TAKE CARE! *hugs* from Von....checking in on our blogs soon ;) Those who don't have blogs...join NUTANG! It's the best community eva...I love this place! :)

*IF you are just as addicted to QUEER EYE FOR THE STRAIGHT GUY click here Happy Tszujing pplz!!!

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SWANK ME!
Wednesday. 3.10.04 12.19 am
mood: much better

Hehehe...I just thought I would say that. That word is so cool - 'swanky' it's like funky but a bit more "modern" :) I'm feeling a whole lotta better today, the events of the weekend I just wanna forget about and look forward to a new day. I'm just trying to concerntrate on my studies, be happy, eat healthy (haaha not working) and just gain a bit of control of my life outside the house. Yeh...so far I have been breathing easy (checks pulse), STILL ALIVE!

Feeling it somewhat...but hope to go back to the gym and get back some extra energy and build that self-esteem again. But I was at uni today for a gruelling 9 hours! Straight psychology - which can get to your head when there's too much! PHEW! Think I need a bit of counselling after today! LOL! I got to catch up with Yo and that was nice. Got to see my friend's workshop at uni where she makes jewellery and it was so cool! I felt like I had stepped back into the past! :)

I can't believe my bro is leaving in a few days...I'm missing him already. Cuz I have never been separated from him not longer than 2 weeks, and this is gonna be a year. It's gonna be tough, but me the lil sis must go on and make her life special too ^_^ Dunno when that is gonna be but hopefully things will happen for me, or I shall be forced to make it happen ;p Awwww...gonna miss him soooo muchos!

I'm happy that Ron had a chat session with me after work on Sunday...we had dinner and just talked. It was good because it wasn't about the problem on my mind but just about 'normal' stuff that friends say when they are cheering u up! It felt comforting to know I still have ppl around me. I know they don't wanna hear my probs and I don't wanna cloud their world with em...just having that support of 'being there' is enough. Thanks to all of those who have listened ^_^

I wanna see the SHAOLIN MONKS perform when they come to perth -dammit! hEHEHE they r so unbelievable! The stuff they do! I wanted to take my dad to go see it cuz he loves this stuff! Plus I saw these lovely CONS at LIVE yesterday the CHUCK TAYLORS Knee high tops! Sweet AS! Me saving real hard from today onwards - AHUH!!!?? They are the classic casual shoes...everyone has to have a pair of CHUCKS MAN! Tiff loves these too...mind if I get em first girl? hahaha! Let's get em together :p

Wellz me a busy bee this week...will try and bring up more happier updates. Till then - I'm sending a ray of sunshine into everyone's life! TAKE CARE and have a great week!

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