it seem like my father is going to lose his job if he is going to make another mistake and my grandmother fell down again and the bill is like only my family is paying and the rest only know how 2 make phone call to act act filial only... and like my father is the 24 hrs driver on stand-by and i think my father is really tired...and to prevent him from getting tired i have to start to grow up and be a good gal... and not like ask them for anything...so now i have decided tt when i grow up i will earn a lot of money..in order to do tt maybe will give up nursing cos nurse is like have to go overseas or study a lot b4 u can have a real promotion and increased of salary...so dream will always be dream, at the very least it will stay very beautiful in my heart....

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i find out tt when i finally say out i hate her,i will be better but now i hate her even more..and i don wan 2 tok about her le....cos now everyday she is doing thing tt irritates me...and now i like wan 2 go to sch early cos now i actually wan 2 go to sch late..i always take my own sweet time to go to sch but now the timing is tt i will meet her in the sch on the way to class!! suay~

today sch is the same...and we have 2 buy a recommended text which cost $30 and can use for 2 yrs o can fill up ur knowledge..to me is a good book cos like i always daydream in lesson and nv do my revision and once tt lecturer explain it i will forget it the next sec..and like most of my classmate got work like tt and like they haven received their pay and i feel a bit angry lor... actually can get it on mon de but now dunno when can get it liao... and we have to like give our grp member c wat we have done for our project next mon but i have not find a single thing yet lor... sian lei..duno where to find..doing about taiwan and i doing about the pace for business ppl and leisure ppl...actually easy to do but too many thing so dunno wat to do and online search only give small paragraph only.... :..(

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today i was really angry!!!...as there is a saying do not be too confident of urself i be too proud...i wan 2 add another 1 do not be so positive thinking....!!! cos u will anger ppl even more....today she was complaining about her cosplay again...and during break she was making phone call....and i was like going to another classmate to tok to her..then 'yn' start to tok to..then a while we were laughing..and guess wat she say...she said SHHHHH! so loudly!! lor...and another 2 other malay come in and they were oso call to shut up lor.. and we went out laughing...cos they oso kena chase out...and u noe later she say wat..she say we noe she is toking and feeling angry and so we automatic leave the room not like the other ppl...i was like damn fuck angry lor...sorry for my word cos i m really angry lor...i was being chase out lor..i don wan 2 leave the room lor...then during lunch break she went out with them and i tell the malay gal(lonely gal) about wat i feel lor..i noe i shld not tell any1 but i was like need to released it out..then she say she will ask her want to change seat but in the end unsuccessful..and later tt fake yw was telling them how the gal wan 2 change seat..i was laughing lor cos is tt gal wan 2 help me lor...and every1 is really avoiding her lor... sy u say in ur msn tt if some1 need anything can go look for u rite?..NOW I WAN U TO GO AND FIND ME A KILLER!!!!!!

and she has a more serious mood swing than i am...now then i noe how irritating i was in the past.. i will change...thz to all those ppl in the past for bearing with my nonsense...i will be a good gal from now...i come to sch for holiday day de lei not to suffer all those stupid thing de lor..somemore i am sitting next to her...save me pls someone!!!!

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yesterday when i was on my way home i kena birdshit lei...but i was really proud of myself cos i stay very calm lor..i was at the msl backgate and as i walk by a tree suddenly something drop on my hand.. at first i thought it was a tree branch lor.then after 1 sec i felt tt my hand was hot and turn to look at my hand and i found out it was birdshit!!!..then i calmly like as if nth happened..i took a tissue in my bag and wipe off..when the birdshit fell on my hand there was 2 msl gals walking in front of me...but they did not laugh la..maybe they were shocked..even if they laugh later i think they r laughing at my reaction..cos i react quite slow..but lucky..i roll up my sleeve if not my uniform get it i will be very panic... thx god...

and today i really let out my burden..felt great lor..like a balloon fill with air is released tt kind of feeling... today tt gal who is sitting beside me had a serious mood swing...and dunno y she left the classroom..and later i noe is she go and ask if there is any place in the restaurant..but now let tok about her first then later i will come to the restaurant...then when i went back in the class adn the rest ask me wat happen to her and i replied 'haiz..i dunno' adn they ask me y i haiz first b4 saying i dunno...at tt point of time i dunno wat to ans cos i don like the gal and find her irritating so i don wan 2 care about her... then later we all come and tok and it is like evry1 got thing to tok..and every1 is feeling the same lor...so now i noe i not the 1 who is sentitive..i thought my sec sch attitude has return and tell u(wk and sy) 1 thing..her mood swing is a lot more serious than mine lor.. they also felt tt she tok a lot in class..most of it is rubbish..and today she really make me irritating..cos is break time soevry1 will be toking rite???!!! then she was like concentrating on copying note again neatly and ppl was toking at the back and she asked to closed the door and then 'yee nern' ask her wat happened she just tell me to leave her alone and she is pissed off...i was even more pissed off than her lorr!!!!..she really concentrating at the wrong time lor..when ppl wan 2 study she will tok tok tok non-stop then when she is studying she wan the whole world to shut up..pls la..i own the sch meh.... tok big... really feel like slapping u!!! do u noe tt..u sure wont noe de la..cos my acting so good...

today went to the restaurant to eat..is was lamb today and we were like dunno how to cut it lor..then half-way through the teacher came and tell us how 2 cut..today learn 1 thing..and i really like 2 eat in the training restaurant...cos can teach us how 2 eat..cos i feel very uneasy eating this lor..cos i feel like ppl watching me cut then i was like dunno how 2 cut..so go there practice eating..then next time can go fine dinning~ we were like asking our teacher y red wine and white wine glass is diff and a waiter took the initative to explain to us!! exceed expection!! good service..today service was good! thumb up!! and while i was drinking my "wine" i was like saw something like ant in my glass then i was like looking so carefully then my teacher ask wat i was doing so paiseh..but it was not ant la..today tt guy not on duty..so sad..to day not handsome but got babe to c..so not too bad..but we saw him,he walk past out class and like listening to music and was like playing with something and dropped down...should go out and help him hor so i can c his front view in good light...lol...

today francis go for interview so we combine class..and so paiseh lor..maybe i not in the pink of health..so when miss lim is a licence nurse must go to where she work to do check-up... i was called three times todays.. 2 times cant ans and the last time finally can ans...the first 2 times i was called i cant ans the qns and my face..from wat my classmate say turn super red lor.. really paiseh until cannot paiseh liao lor...

so tt all for today... and ya..wk go uk funfair today and asked me but i was at hm le..bath le ate my dinner and was practicing my gz at tt time so next time called earlier!!!!!! goodbye..

o ya..and just now wk oso remind me tt to be careful tt my classmate will betray me so now a bit worried so now mst learn to be careful with my word instead of not toking..if not might end up like today..1 whole thing just released..i willl learn to be careful de and thz for ur reminded..

and actually i hope to be like u lor can skip lesson..and i wan 2 nag le... so easy for u to get in but for me lei..u c...u c...pls don skip lecture again..pls think of ppl like me then u wont skip lesson le...think of japan.... thin think think!!

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i really hate her voice..cos when her voice travel to my ear..i really hope my ear will shut away her voice cos it is really irritating...she must tell her story to ppl...i hate to communicate wif her..cos is like she does not wan 2 listen to me and i was like must listen to her toking so tt is y i nv ans her when she tok to me...

and i think the more i hide the more the teacher will call me...tt wat i feel lor..but i really don wan her to call me..but she now will always call me to read..and the first person... -.- and today my class chairman tell me tt i will be the captain for the inter-class game..then i was like...sian lor...but he say my job is to tell instruction...i hate it..i hate to face a lot of ppl.... sian...

and today more sian is tt when i get to sch and on my phone and i was shock tt only left 1 bat...and i was sian lor...cant sms wk...only sms a while then give me low bat warning...

and today got debate and was like boring... stupid gay... end here...

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just finished reading yun yun story and tt really make me cried..finally ur story make me cried le...cos its about me... -.-

and ya..my prepaied card left a small amount of $$ le..so if 1 day i nv reply ur nag tt means no $$ to reply... cso my bro haven buy for me..y must he buy for me lei cos i have him $$ to help me buy...y ask him buy lei..cos i everyday study till very late and he like everyday dunno wat time come home..all i noe is a lot more early than me... but i noe how 2 buy cos he demo 1 time for me le..just go there and say 'uncle, and point my finger to a card ans say this 1!!! and pay $$'

today got tok a lot..and record a lot of stupid videos..and i got do the 36 qns and those who stay in class during break get the wns from me...finally i m useful le..and today francis nv come so for our accommadation we go next class and tt lecturer always recap..then after a long time she come to me cos i was 'hiding' myself but luckily tt qns i noe how 2 ans...heng lor..ok tt all!!

o ya..make up..who don wan pretty..but i dunno how to do lor..later become ru hua..then i faint..and like exp lor and got a lot of diff brushes but diff part of the face..i was like seeing star lor...and some like can only last a few mth..and those sponge from wat i watch from tv is like must change a new 1 very often like 1 week must change o 2 days must wash 1 time... got foundation(cream,gel,powder) conceler all those... wk...after u learn le..then teach me la.. ^^

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today went to the library..wan 2 find information about my project but i search and can only find lots of information on china which i don wan..the chinese section was worst lor..everything was about CHINA.. i was like thinking other than china we wont go any other place meh... and i cant find information about taiwan... then oso wanted to find about chocolate for my oral presentation,going to do it with hui fen... but then cant find o there is too much where i don noe where to start and on the webste oso got a lot but dunno where to start wif lor..then instead i took a book on make-up and find a place to sit down and read..

and in the library i really find it irritating if some1 phone ring lor..i mean u oso in the library then u don wan other ppl to disturb u but there u r nv switch ur hp to silent...and i saw a man taking a book covering his face and sleep..i was like cant u go home and sleep..u r wasting a place for ppl who wan to read lor..and is a china ppl...cos later his gf i think come and sit infront of him to block him like tt...

and for the first time i feel like i was really disconnected from the outside world..feel so strange..like the borrowing book machine like somehow change le..and i was asking myself on my way home when was the last time i come to library le...omg...so now i noe y i cant communicate wif my classmates...i live in a diff era...and they say i belong to the cai qin and fei yu qing tt kind of time..but i was like not bad wat.. at least their living pace was not so fast like now..singapore is the world no 1 fastest walking speed lor..i m a singaporean when i end my lesson i was the fast to get out of the class and leave the sch...but when i go to sch i was like super slow...

and on my way home i think a lot..i think tt i got enough $$ to spend can le..so i decided if i pass my math i will go for nursing..even thought nurse wont earn must unless i study and upgrade myself but the working hrs is not long and i can enjoy myself..enoy my life slowly...so now i finally noe wat i wan le...and because long time haven step in the library, now i feel like going there to read books..miss reading books..so i decided le..i fine day during my holiday i going there to read books for the whole day...

and huijia like tok to me in friendster... and she heard from some1 said tt i was going to RP..the first thing in my mind was u r lying...cos i nv ever mention i wantd to go to rp lor...and after taking my o lvl result i was like nv contact any1 lor so how can she heard from some1 saying i was going to rp..anyway go there for wat...from my o lvl..i don even have a single course from rp...but nvm..i was like no feeling..so its okay..just treat it as chit chat lor..and add her back in friendster too..cos nth better to do..

and on my way back home do a lot of thinking..so now i only want to enjoy my life...so i think i will start to pamper myself le..but will still save $$ la.. ok tt s all for today..thz for tunning in to zhutoulin news..have a nice day good bye!

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miss lim it seeem likes u have forgotten ur f&n...chocolate will be converted to fat..so it will nv be able to end up in the sewage de... at first i thought i will learn to be independent in this course but somehow it make me more quiet instead...

i did try to walk out lor...but i really hate it... from the minute i was born out till now..there is no DEPENDENT in my dictionary.... if next time i choose to work in the hotel o during my attachment there will be food provided so not to worry.. ^^ not to worry for the time being..erm so now i just take 1 step at a time... frm the start of the sch till now i only secretly cried once..so it considered very good le...

actually i have decided tt if i passed my maths i will sign up for the nursing course after i completed my ite..then after i have done wif the 2 courses i will then decided which path i will take so if everything go smoothly(hope so) i will still have 5 more yrs to think carefully ^^ hehez....

so now u better go find out all the hospitals in japan and in future u can go there 1 by 1 to find a place fro urself.. ^^

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