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To the window... to the WALL!!


Noodle
Age. 18
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. Sexy
Location Merrimack - DO IT UP,
School.
» More info.
AMB ONLINE??
Sunday. 11.30.03 11:13 pm
So... appearantly you can get the AMB online... cept its like madness expensive... i cant get it from the only person that i know has it here because he promised scott that he would never give it to me.... matt e said he would work on it for me.

Hmmm... today... wonderful day. Home... finally.... at 12ish... scotty came back and i helped him upstairs, with his rents, then the 4 of us went out to lunch. After that scotty and i came back... for some reason had the whole room to ourselves, and... well made the best of it to put it blunty. I already told ma, and lara... Scotty dropped the L-bomb on me today.... hmmmm..... dont know what to say still... i dont know i dont know...

Chillin with the girls "I CANT FEEL MY FACE" love you guys! hahaha. and medori land? ah, the endless possibilities. chillin at ash now, doing some readin, talking to mikey, and waiting for scott to not be playing video games. Gunna sleep soon... then.... the last week of the semester begins.

The hair is a hit G... good job

and im out.
3

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hahaha suck my kiss
Sunday. 11.30.03 3:43 am
hmmm... i kind of wish i could sit still... i wish i could sleep as well... this is slightly upsetting to me because i know i have to be up in three hours and 15 min... its my own fault im still awake... hmm

lets see... i suppose i could start updating from the long weekend.

Had a great time with my scotty on tuesday and then my daddy came, took us out to lunch, and we went home. Tuesday night i went to laras to see lara christine and heather. Chilled there, then went to matts house cuz my bro was there. Chilled with matt, paul, kris, wolf, LIGGET!!! i know... wow... and then some ppl left and elise came.... we chizilled, i talked to danny vento... nothing but drama all the time in my life here in weston... sigh.... i did think it in the end, just a bit, and im not totally convinced, but he may have been sleeping with allyson while he was with me... sad fucking day... oh well.

Wednesday... ummm... wednesday... oh i had a doctors apt at 11, got meds, ran some errands... then i met up with heather lara and christine at christines. We all went to CVS, and got some hair dye WOOT WOOT IM A RED HEAD..... sort of... i likey a lot. PROPS TO G FOR THE DYE JOB! went to my dads to have dinner with the fam, and gram... and then was taking micah home and kota called, so i saw him for some hugs, then took micah home, and elise came over... we chilled with kris, dee, lazar, paul, and amanda for a while, and then we went to chizill and to cvs...

Thursday i worked from 9-2, came home.... thxgiving dinner with the sad excuse for a family... micahs friend, and yes, moms boyfriend... yes... that was fun, walking down the stairs, and not knowing he was coming, and meeting him, and he shaves his arms... whatever, it was over... and that was good. Movies with lara christine and elise... we saw runaway jury. good movie. good color changing cup... im drinking out of it now.

Friday work from 8-12 then TO CLINTON I WENT!!! went to go see scotty... chilled with him and 5 of his friends for 2 hours... THEN I CHILLED WITH ASHLEY!!! WE WENT TO WALLMART AND TO A HEAD SHOP!!! so much fun with them. i missed you guys so much... all you mack ppl.... honestly. I really did miss scott though... and i think the feeling was mutual... this would be why i drove all the way over there instead of wating till sudnay. It made me feel happier to be with them. sat night with lara clarke and laurahill at laras... sad day cuz i didnt get drunk, but it was fun. movies and chillin just like we used to do.

Today is saturday. I woke up.... frumped around.... went to westport.... BIG MISTAKE! so many ppl... came back, went to the mall with lara... a good time as usual, and some short skirts in the winter to go with it.... its only getting colder g.... adn what do we buy? ASS SHORT SKIRTS WHAAHHOOO. dropped lara off and went to the center to get some dinner.... said goodbye, and came home. chilled by my lonesome tonight... getting ready to go back, and keeping my bad mood away from the peeps. i was thinking of going out with chrisitne... no cally tho... i think thats my fault... well not mine, kris'. he left the phone off the hook all night and our line was down... watched drumline tho... and tv... helped rob from philosophy pick out a bracelet for his gf for xmas... he gets her some nice ass stuff let me tell you that... wow. anyway... then kris came home wtih paul and matt, and i really should have gone to bed, but i chizilled with them instead... was bad... puked... that felt good, i was feeling sick all night... i needed a good puke... chizilled more and more and packed and chilled and now im up like woah... and i have to be up in three hourse... greeeaaaattt..


IM GOING HOME TOMORROW! yes, i have gotten into the habbit of calling good old mack home... my mom doesnt like it... i would just rather not consider weston my home. Buddies: i dont want you to think i hate you all... i cant really explain it, but being here just makes me so depressed... i jsut... i dont know.. you know the slumps i used to get into ... thats what happens when i come home... it felt weird to be here in october, but i was too busy to think.. being home from tuesday till sunday just... i dont know... i dont like it... sorry though... i love you guys a lot, and i miss you too... i just dont miss it here.

Gunna see scotty... i cant wait. Hes been so sweet the whole weekend... i just want to see him.
Ma- i have a lil sumin sumin to show you... i think you'll be rather shocked. whahoo

AND GIRLS WE HAVE HOCKEY ON FRIDAY!!! ash and i have decided that over break were going to go to all the hockey games, i hope everyone is down for that STREET GANG REPRESENT.

aaight, im out to go see if kris is still awake. night all... see you soon.... or later'

peaceout

sarah

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hate home. miss school.
Thursday. 11.27.03 4:10 pm
miss my scotty:

aimlow401: awww i wanna be w/ u so bad right now, i can't wait till sunday... >skimo<

ill update bigger eventually... maybe tomorrow... i dont know... maybe tonight... i blah.

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Random
Monday. 11.24.03 11:56 pm
I just found this on ash's journal... decided to throw it in there

Name? Sarah Courtney MillsMills... wow... did i studder?

Age? 18 whhaaahoo

City/State? CT

School Grade? Freshman at Merrimack College

Music? alittle bit of everything no country

Talents? hmmm... well... i can play a mean game of hockey, and i can do this weird thing with my thumb... I CAN FISH DANCE!!! I CAN DANNNNCEEE!

Shy? hahaha. hardly. "HEY CANADA! GREAT GAME LAST NIGHT" "WE'RE VERY PROUD OF YOU HUSBAND!!!"

Screen Name? Meaning? hahaa. tongue ring. rabbit... hop. hop. hop..... dont ask

Quote? "im gunna go play with barbies... and drink some more" "im going to get arrested for sexual harrassment AND HOMICIDE!" - both me

With two days left to live... hockey players anyone? lots of sex.... hmmm... bungee jumping, take a really intense drug. tell ppl i love them.

Life Goal? succeed

Life Dream? To be happy... really... truely... happy

Ever Been in love? yea... ... i have nothing to say

What is love? love is a feeling that can not be defined

What Else should i know? my wrist hurts. it looks like i tried to kill myself. i like barbies...hmm drinking....

had a great night with mr. pytlik...ill have to write about later... so nice...

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Waste of a day
Monday. 11.24.03 6:17 pm
Today has got to be the biggest waste of a day ive ever had. I dont know... i just... blah.. all day. Went to my 8am late cuz i had to take care of something... then i went to DD's with laura and megz, then to study with Kate... useless studyin... i had an exam. a 3 fucking question long exam. thats such shit if you ask me. quiz's are 3 questions... well i guess exams are too... 30 pts 30 pts and 40 pts. great. motherfucking great. well anyway, i get my bio exam back tomorrow... i failed that too... becuase you know, im just that cool. im so happy that everything is going so well at school. seems the only thing i can do here is party right... everything else has just been fucked.

Ive been sick for waaaay too long. I really dont understand this. Its beyond pissing me off.... too many days on meds... all these meds have bad side effects... and ive been on them for 25 days... and counting. Honeslty WTF. I just dont understand.

Today i just feel gross. Sad. Tired. Drained. And more than ready to leave here, but not so much ready to go home... guess i have no choise.

Havent seen scotty all day... well once, but i ignored him... one more day to go... yes this time im avoiding him... its going to be a long time without him... hmmm nothing i can do about it now, i might aswell stop being a baby about it, thats not the way he wants me to be either. He says he'll miss me... i think he'll be too buttfuck drunk, to notice that we're not together. what.ever. again, nothing i can do about it now. anyway... i spent the rest of the day skipping class and hiding in my room... yes i really have been in here all day... im not listening to drum and bass... hmmm dave.

I just dont know man. Class tomorrow... packing... then im out out out of here... my daddy is coming to get me, and i actually dont know how im getting back up... sad day.

Anyway... im outski... later foo's

sarah

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From bad to worse to better to shit.
Monday. 11.24.03 11:47 am
Oh yea... thats the way life goes i guess.

I really wish i could be happy... im just... not. and this time i have a valid reason, its just just cuz im sad or whatever... i omg... just want to go home.

Friday night would have been great Hockey Game, and Third Eye Blind at Merrimack... got a nice little UTI right before the hockey game... uhhuh... dont know if you all have ever had one... i just wanted to cry. honestly, i almost did. LaLook during the whole hockey game... mmmm Lalonde! The concert was so much fun... well should have been so much fun... if i didnt feel like i was dying. I had to leave early, and came back to my room to cry. called my mom, and she was no help, so i called mommy britt (chrissies mom) actually, i called lara first, but she no picky up. so anyway, mommy called police services, because she didnt want me to suffer till monday, cuz there are no doctors here on the weekend... so i went down there, adn was going to go to the hospital by myself, but when scotty found out i was going he wouldnt let me go alone, then kate like ran down there cuz she wasnt going to let me go alone either... no one wanted me to go alone, but i didnt want to ruin anyones saturday night... so, the cab came 45 min later, and i went to Lawrence Gen Hospital... gross.... sick.... scary.... disturbing.... ew. I was there for like an hour... told them what i had... and an hour later they told it right back to me. What.ever. So yesterday i got meds... wonderful... not really... so now im on 4 different meds... im afraid to sleep and i feel like i cant handle this. I just want to cry all the time, because im always sick, and i just feel like im not going to get better ever.

Im going home this weekend... everyone tells me to relax. RELAX???? i have 2 papers to write, and one to start, and col writing reading... and ahhh i have to work 2 days because im a broke fuck, and i have to have family time and family time, and family time.

Im hiding. I wanted to go home today, but i couldnt get my mother on the phone... surprise surprise... well, anyway, chrissie is leaving today, and im just gong to stay in my room and pack and sulk till i get to go home, so i can sit in my room... in my closet... on my floor... in my bathroom... and sulk more.

Buddy Countdown: t minus 2 days. i cant wait to see you all... cant promise the best of moods, but i love you all still.


well... im off to the SAK soon so i can check my mail. then im back to the dorm for the day.... not going to philosophy. fuck that.

pizzzout yo.

3

Forgot to add friday night... which was the "better" i had such a great night:

after a bottle of twisted green apple 70 proof, and the captain... me, chrissie, ash, kori, carolina, and doug went to tewksbury. ma and i played some drunken beruit... we all chilled, i got to sing cake with james... and mullhearn, so much fun... so much fun. had a little run in with a radiator, and it looks like i tried to slit my writst, no joke:
"no, no guys, nope, i really dont want that there... no, no i dont think i want that there... no thank you... nope"
"sarah where are you going"
"im going to go play with barbies... and drink some more"
thanks guys for your help... washing that and stuff. bad ratiator. grrr... lol so after walking back at like 23o the whole way martel was trying to talk to me, and scotty was trying to force me to tlak to him... when i really didnt want to. its not that im mad, im jsut... i dont know, sometimes i get a sick feeling in my stomach when i get around james mullhearn and martel... jsut... so much shit.... i almost cried when james was so nice to me... i just couldnt understand how you could be so nice to someone, and then have the heart to hurt them so badly... i dont knoe... but hmmm we get back to find out andy wolffe is fucking some... coughcowcough in his room.... hmmm "from 12 to 7 with one half hour break" its been fun listening to the boys harrass him. last night was so funny i was chillin with mark mike and aj, and they were like ew.. it was so gross ive never seen mikey like this before... he was like talking about how she was so fat "you dont even have to find the hole, just put in in one of the fat rolls" "cover her in flower so you can find the wet spot and put in in there" g-ross


well, id love to stay, but i must go. ash and kate are waiting.

peace

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SEE I DONT NEED NO FUCKING HOOK ON THIS BEAT

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