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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

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I really do. Perhaps it's the anonymity that comes with this beautiful community, or perhaps it's the fact that none of my friends have a nuTang account (as far as I know). I'm pretty sure that very few people read my blog/readings/whatever else, so I can do whatever I want and not care. Whereas on Xanga I need to be careful as to what I say. Actually, I don't, but I do it out of courtesy for others? I'm not so sure, but I think no matter what I say, I will contradict myself. Sadly.
I feel like I split certain aspects of myself into certain blogs. For example, this blog gets the more emotional side of me, my xanga gets my general crap, and my diaryland gets all my amorous crap and girly girl crap. I hate to read over that diaryland. One day, I will combine all three of these aspects into one great blog. This might take some years seeing that I am pretty picky about how much stuff people learn about me. It's weird that I only want my friends to know the general stuff. Whereas I am totally okay with strangers reading this and whatnot. <3 strangers that aren't pedophiles and I really like those strangers that don't care. i.e. they read part of this, and forget about it within a hour. <3!

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

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I hate feeling two completely opposite feelings at the same time. Sometimes when I see someone I just want to hug them, but I also feel like beating them up. haha.

You know I've been thinking a lot lately.. Especially after watching last Wednesday's One Tree Hill episode. Anyone could turn into Jimmy. In fact, I could've been him. There were so many times I wanted to bring a gun to school and shoot the crap out of people I hate. You know, it really got me when he said "I just want this to end" I could relate.

Sometimes I feel really out of touch with the real world. I live my life as though I'm on some reality tv show. Sometimes I just sit on the floor in the dark, listening to music and just thinking. The thing I realized was that I think the most at night, before I go to bed. This is when I discover all the good stuff that I should be putting in my blogs, but I always forget them when day comes.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

Comment! (0) | Recommend!