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on another note
Wednesday. 2.1.17 11:37 am
Several updates with my life. Let's start with the small.

Today is day 3 (4 on the actual day I'm posting) of no soda. I just want a coke. But I know if I stick with it long enough then I will get to a point where I won't crave them, as much (if at all). I'll keep you guys updated.

Now onto bigger updates!

I'm going to an information session today (now yesterday for when I'm actually posting this entry) for an MBA program for working professionals. I'm still trying to decide between an MBA or an MPA with emphasis in HR or Gov't Admin. I haven't found any MPA programs for working professionals that aren't strictly online, yet, so I'll need to do more digging. My undergrad was in business, and honestly I'd rather go the MPA route 1) because it's more focused on what I currently do, 2) it would make me more well rounded, and 3) less math. I hate math, and I barely passed my math classes in undergrad. We shall see how I feel after the info session, I'll keep you updated.


I'm also really starting to think about buying a home. I need to figure out what I can afford and start looking, but also need to decide if I'm actually going to have roommates once I buy. I'm leaning towards no, not because I dislike my current roommates (they're some of my best friends and I love them), but I think I'm just ready to be on my own. Also need to decide town home vs. actual home not attached to other units. I also need to write down necessities/things I'd really prefer (i.e. garden bath would be a nice plus). And then there's the money thing. This is something where patience is a must, and, admittedly, I have lacked in this category in the past.

***UPDATE ON THE INFO SESSION***

The info session went well, it lasted about 45 minutes, and I learned a few new things that I didn't gather from the website. Acceptance rate into this program is about 87%, which is promising. For standardized testing I learned that it'll be better for me to go the GRE route instead of the GMAT route, as the GMAT apparently involves more math (which, as stated previously, is my true weakness). The program has several study abroad options for working professionals, they're super flexible if you need to take a term off, and the campus is super close to where I work. Win/win/win.

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want vs. need
Wednesday. 2.1.17 9:46 am
I often reflect on past relationships and look at what went "right" vs. what went "wrong." And something I come back to regularly is that either a guy I dated was someone I wanted but didn't need (i.e. attraction was there but sense of responsibility was absent), or that I probably needed but didn't want (i.e sense of responsibility was there/priorities were in order, but the attraction wasn't as strong).

Which makes me wonder if I will ever "find" (I use that term loosely because I am not actively looking) someone that I am attracted to but who also, to be blunt, has their shit together (and is emotionally available). I haven't been able to find that balance yet.

I've been a lot more stingy lately when it comes to giving certain people "chances" at dating, too. I know certain things that I want, and I know certain things that I don't want. If I see something that I don't think I could get on board with [i.e. if they have small children (I'm just not ready for that)] then I won't even consider a person. And I think: could this be someone I'm missing out on because I'm being too cutthroat? Or is this just me being assertive and straightforward with myself?

Who knows. Right now I'm content with where I am in life. Of course I want a companion, but I don't NEED one.

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anxiety
Wednesday. 1.25.17 4:25 pm
I traveled to ATL, this weekend, to visit one of my friends and ended up coming back a day early because I broke out in some kind of stress rash.

Pretty much anytime I travel my anxiety is more apparent, especially if it's a road trip. But this time I think there were several other factors that played into breaking out. The weather was absolutely crappy the entire time I was there, which already messed with my mood. I was stressed out about missing work, for some reason (even though I wasn't missing anything crucial). I told my mom about some personal things I was going through (sorry I can't elaborate on that). I just generally feel...flustered, and not in control.

...and I am a freak when it comes to needing to feel like I am in control.

Also, I decided to deactivate my Facebook account. I might possibly delete it, if I can find a way to mass download all the pictures I have/pictures I'm tagged in. I'm just tired of measuring my self worth based on how many "likes/reactions" I can get on a post. The political posts are also stressing me out, too. It's good to be aware and active, but anytime I log in there's NOTHING personal, anymore. It's all about how we're doomed (which may very well be true).

Just a quick jotting down of my thoughts.

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for one eye only
Friday. 1.20.17 8:41 am
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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It's been a while.
Thursday. 10.20.16 1:21 pm
Three years, roughly? Randomly today I came across an old Wordpress account, and it made me think of all of the other sites I had accounts on, and I completely forgot about nuTang (I'm sorry forgive me). A friend of mine had to remind me of the blog site AND my own username.

Weird to think how much can change in three years. I've graduated college, I have a full time job doing not only something related to my degree, but that I actually ALSO LOVE (what is that!? I think that's a "career" as opposed to a "job"). Crazy.

And a bunch of other stuff going on that I'll probably talk about at a later time. Right now though, I am content. Three months ago I left a job AND a guy that both drained the life and the ["me"] out of me. People can physically tell that I am happier, now. And I am.

Hope you guys are all well.

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Resolutions.
Tuesday. 1.15.13 10:33 pm
I used to make New Year's resolutions, but as of this past October (2012) I decided I wasn't going to make "resolutions" because it *almost* implied that by the end of the year the resolution expired.

I like to make "life changes" now. Remember last time I was most active on NuTang? (If you don't I won't be insulted, I promise.) I was constantly complaining about losing weight and going to the gym. Talking, but not doing.

So instead of waiting until the semester and year were over, I started running with one of my friends. In the beginning, I couldn't even run a lap around the track without completely being out of breath. Now, four months later, I can run a mile in 8.5 minutes. I am a notch size smaller on my belt, and now I've incorporated thigh and ab workouts into my routine. The best part was I didn't change a damn thing about my eating habits. Granted I probably would've gotten results faster, but hey, I can't help my sweet tooth.

I guess my point is if you're looking for change, just go out there and do it. Don't let opinions of others sway you, don't wait to start next year, or next month, or even next week. If you want to change something, start working towards it now!

Another thing that I've done (so far that I'm proud of that probably could count as a New Year resolution because I started after the break don'tjudgeme) is keep my side of the dorm room clean. Seriously, I am messy. I'm used to letting my room get pretty trashed (not literal trash, but just like clothes and books everywhere) and then doing a big clean up once a week. But now I've been consistently keeping it clean, and I LOVE coming back from classes to a clean room. It's a great feeling.


On a different note, the background on the "Create New Weblog Entry" is completely tripping me out right now.

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